Antidisingenuousmentarianism

 Does this sandwich at IHOP actually look appetizing to you in any way? The cheese appears gluey, the bread too toasted, there's some glob of white stuff poking out, and (most of all) the color of the roast beef is bleh. Y'all couldn't pretend it's high quality? You had to go for the shade of purple between the pink of medium rare and the brown of well-done? The idea sounds delish. The sandwich itself could scare me away from IHOP for a long time.

Also, know that Dallas seasons 1 and 2 have been completed, sadly meaning there may be fewer opportunities for a while to walk around the house asking one's spouse to do things in J.R.'s accent ("Bebbah... how 'bout weee watch sem Deh-llas?"). With the exciting conclusion and the episodes that preceded it, there was also a brief discussion about how much more people used to drink in this country. I mean, clearly Sue Ellen has a problem, but a) the amount other people drink is amazing (Jock had a frigging bypass, and he still drinks plenty o' brown liquor after a brief resting period), and b) the amount she has to drink to be placed in the "drunk" category is likewise. She seems to finish off a good-sized decanter within a few hours. Hot damn, Sue Ellen! Anyway, so presuming (big presumption here) this is not entirely a tv thing, why do we drink so much less these days? Sure, health reasons can be suggested, but drinking a little is recommended by doctors, and when would we ever pass up an excuse to indulge ourselves? Mr. Brown suggests it is that so many people have quit smoking. Another possibility that has occurred to me just now is the rise of evangelical Christianity, which is not a big fan of drinking. Have googled briefly around to see if there are widely available/publicized studies, but no luck so far. Guesses? Resources?

Stanley Fish will tell you why it is. He is a smart motherfucker and a hell of a writer. What I would like to think is that students know this stuff by the time they hit college, but they do not. Here is a paragraph to suck you in:

Most composition courses that American students take today emphasize content rather than form, on the theory that if you chew over big ideas long enough, the ability to write about them will (mysteriously) follow. The theory is wrong. Content is a lure and a delusion, and it should be banished from the classroom. Form is the way.

He is lying, of course. But he is doing so because form is where the kids need instruction. And some people think grammar's not sexy and don't want to teach it... pfft. [bugmenot NYT and thanks to Hassiotis]

1) UGA faculty, white as snow.

A more diverse faculty is important, said religion professor Jace Weaver, partly because a university wants "to have people in front of the classroom that look like the people who are sitting in the classroom."

Apparently, it does, except that most professors are dudes, and the majority of UGA students are female.

2) Oy vey. Those who will be affected by the ordinance restricting sidewalk displays downtown are fussing about the fiberglass bulldogs also there.

The fiberglass fidos can stay up because the Athens-Clarke Commission specifically approved them, Mayor Heidi Davison said. An agreement between the woman's club and the county government lasts until July 2006. It could be renewed, but Davison and Ford said they haven't discussed it yet.

3) Tony Eubanks writes about ACC taking control of Milledge and Prince Aves instead of the state. He thinks this would enable local govt to make them both more pedestrian (and bike) friendly. I'm not sure he covers the way it would get paid for well enough.

4) Letters: Don't insult Clarke County School System. Kidd says she's not a newbie. All immigrants are murderous gang members? Proposal that would expand seating at Sanford but leave it open. It also costs money to indict Wilbanks.

5) ABH photographers rock.

6) Actual program of Head Start is working, but administration has real problems.

7) Perdue gets to choose a GA Supreme Court justice, the first Republican to get to do so in years and years. It is suspected that politics will play a role. Considering the remaining six justices were appointed by Democrats, even a real hardliner isn't going to make a huge difference.

8) Perdue reaching out to the press to try to pretend there's a compromise on HB 218 (the secrecy bill that would've kept economic development negotiations in the dark until they were actually gonna happen). ABH not buying it.

9) Jim looks at Michael Thurmond's chances at GA Lieut. Gov.

10) But it's compassionate conservatism.

11) This Oconee County ordinance re: brick homes is a bit strange, but presenting Hardiplank as a genuine alternative to brick, one that's being explicitly requested by consumers and not used because it saves builders money (although it does) is equally so.

12) Slow news day.

13) Outdoor lighting regulations coming up. ABH supports it, a bit surprisingly. Will be curious to see if Safe Campuses Now or similar organization clashes with astronomers over this.

14) Courtesy 4-eva!

[Possible update later] [bugmenot ABH]

Maybe there will be a chance at it someday. After a fine first round (victory at a score of 6 to 2), Quiz Bowl ended with a narrow defeat in the second round, at least partially due to a seriously flawed bracketing philosophy. Why, brain? Why couldn't you remember that ethanol is the chemical released by ripening/rotting fruit? Or that "order" comes between something and something else in the classification system? You knew things that were considerably more obscure. I must have faith that it will come around again, with better results.

1) The Seven-Per-Cent Solution: If the summation "Sherlock Holmes meets Freud" gets you salivating, you are as big a nerd as I am and the target audience for this movie, which is a pretty solid Holmes outing with an interesting veneer. You have the real detective and then you have the detective of the mind/consciousness, beginning to find his way, both working off evidence that others would overlook. Whether or not you give real credence to Freud's conclusions, it's an interesting parallel, and there's plenty of action in the movie, what with people swordfighting on top of trains and being chased by killer horses and playing tennis in fascinating fashion (indoors, where you can boonk the ball off the slanted walls, creating some crazy trajectories). Also, Robert Duvall as Watson is rather strange, but does a nice job. Neato.

2) Ghost Story (1981): Most of what I'd heard before renting this was that it wasn't all that scary, and considering the cast (Fred Astaire, Melvyn Douglas, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr., John Houseman), I assumed it was for reasons of tastefulness. Howevs. Within the first fifteen minutes, we have full frontal male nudity, a dude falling a seriously long way out of a building, and majorly gross corpse makeup. Not bad and not what I was expecting. Also, not an anthology, though there are some stories in flashback. The central mystery is a bit lacking (both easy to figure out and not as horrifying as one would expect, given the makeup that shows up throughout), but there is a gooey terror of female sexuality that underlies the whole thing, and that makes it interesting. Alice Krige brings some depth to her role too.

3) Primer: How about a little exposition, douchebag? Good ideas at the heart and a weak grasp of the actual events make it frustrating that it's not explained more clearly. Really, how about any exposition at all? I like the idea of a new take on time travel. And I understand that including such always leads to complicated scenarios, but I don't need a diagram to comprende. What I could use is a sense of, for example, which dude is Aaron and which dude is Abe. The current user review featured on IMDB begins, "You remember the first time you saw The Matrix . . . and you could barely keep up with what was going on, trying to piece together the pieces of what you were being told into a coherent story." You know what? That wasn't that hard for me. This was. [Update: Kottke apparently also watched this this weekend. He seems to be at peace with not knowing what the fuck happens, though.]

4) Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events: Three books jammed together into one movie and yet it still feels thin and stretched. The pacing at the end is painfully slow. And why in the fuck is Dustin Hoffman even in the movie? It is pleasant to see Jim Carrey not working on the Oscar goal, and he is amusing at times, but it's all a bit tiresome. Beautiful art direction. No one acts badly. I wish that were enough. Much of the darkness of the books (which is nothing compared to Edward Gorey's stuff) feels lightened and brightened. Fidget provoking.

Carrie Underwood = New South, and Bo Bice = Old South. "The new new South - the victor - is Republican; it's cheerful, it's Bible-happy" and "In Mr. Bice's long-gone version of the South, people are still Democrats, or at least hippies and outlaws, and they're kind of mad and trapped and defeatist. They're happy only when they're home." Oh, wait, except wrt Carrie, "Her trademark cover song is 'Independence Day,' by Martina McBride, in which a woman gets jubilant revenge on her battering husband." That's not so very lie back and think of England, childbirth and obeying one's husband is the punishment for eating the apple, is it? And Bo? "Come on, didn't you know Mr. Bice would lose when he sang Lynyrd Skynyrd's 'Sweet Home Alabama'? 'In Birmingham they love the governor.' Of the 75 or so viewers who actually paid attention to the lyric, it can't have landed easily: a white Southern man singing nostalgically about segregation." Which, you know, goes along with the Democrats of the time, but not so much these days. So, eh... it's a wash. [bugmenot NYT]

1) Arch Foundation really not to the stage of actually existing yet.

2) ACC budget not changing a whole lot.

Commissioners cut two of 54 new positions proposed by Davison in the $155 million budget - an urban planner and a coordinator for government Web sites - but made no other changes.

No opportunity to build killer robots after all. At least not in one place. Work will be contracted out, most likely.

Commissioners removed the two positions to balance the budget because they recently decided to let county employees count unused sick days toward retirement, which will cost an estimated $133,000. About $131,000 was budgeted for the e-government coordinator and urban planner.

So not because they thought the positions weren't necessary. Still no money for transit. It's all wait and see what the people want.

3) Not a ton of options for childcare for poor families during the summer.

About two-thirds of students in the Clarke County School District - almost 8,000 children - live in families poor enough that they qualify for free or reduced-price lunch during the school year. Those students - children of the poor and the working poor - don't have enough inexpensive summer activities they can participate in, Gardner and Tucker said.

Wrap your brain around the first part of that.

4) Yeah. You know that Simpsons episode? It becomes reality in Athens this fall.

5) State House Speaker takes a page from O'Reilly.

6) ABH explains what needs to be done about the ACTION board. e.g., people need to show up to meetings.

7) Graduate school is working on diversity (more so than undergraduate).

[bugmenot ABH]

It's easy to think Eminem's new single/video, "Ass Like That" (at aolmusic) is just a collection of randomness: Crank Yankers puppets, jokes about the Olsens, Janet's boobie, Jessica Simpson, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. It's always easy to think that. The ILM discussion definitely seems to. But, as usual, Em has slightly more on his mind. I'm not going to argue that the song is one of his better ones. It's far too slow to show off his particular verbal talents. But what it's about, which the video makes clear, is the prevalence of sexuality and particularly (of late) underage sexuality in our culture. Between the Olsens, the lines about Hilary Duff, and the R. Kelly reference, it seems pretty obvious to me that that's what he's doing. Using a puppet dog to convey this lust half the time is a way to deflect a little outrage. Point is, I'm not sure he thinks it's wrong to think Hilary Duff's ass is hot, especially if it is. It's a little strange that so much attention gets paid to who's technically at the age of consent and who's not, when we're animals in terms of the way our sex drive works. An ass is an ass, in a lot of ways, and you can't control who makes you go "ba doing doing doing."

As in "people vote for the guy they'd rather have a beer with," isn't exactly either proved or disproved by the lengthy McCain profile in this week's New Yorker, which, as seems to be the case a lot lately, isn't on their site (there's a Q&A with the author that reveals some of what it's about). It is a smart article, and Bruck does make it clear that McCain is a politician, however much he strives not to be seen as one, but it also shows that, like it or not, the dude is on the neocon train as far as America's right, nay need of, exerting force in the world abroad in the name of democracy. I know liberals like him. Hell, it's hard not to. The way he speaks of public service is genuinely inspiring. And yet. And yet. Someone who, if elected, might've gotten us into more wars than the current administration, someone who has kind of wussed on the whole torture issue (despite having been subjected to it), someone who has absolutely confirmed that he would appoint pro-life judges to the Supreme Court should make you real damn nervous, no matter how much he can seem like your fun uncle.

Meet the Fockers: Expectations were not high, so when this didn't completely suck* it was nice. So, yes, no comedy of this sort should be two hours long, and there is a bit much revisiting of previous jokes in usual sequel style (for fuck's sake, we saw the first movie and we have a memory that lasts longer than two seconds). But also, people were right in talking about how fun to watch Hoffman and Streisand are, him because it doesn't take a huge leap to think "this must be rather what Dustin Hoffman is like in everyday life" and her because, well, you don't expect to like her, but she's so loose and warm-seeming, as opposed to evil Barbra with the insanely manicured nails and the worshipful audience. The Ben Stiller stuff is obviously pretty old by this point (cringing, fucking up, being awkward), to the extent that really you'd like him to buck the hell up and act like he has some balls. And the plot has way too much shoehorned into it, so the end rushes up in seriously deus ex machina fashion. Anyway, not awful and made me laugh from time to time, which is more than I expected.

*Why bother to rent something you're pretty sure will suck? Like you don't do it?

Let us revisit two songs covered in the past that have, oddly, in the way that things do, stayed in my brain somehow. They've taken up residence, and I can't evict them, so I might as well get used to it.

1) Tegan & Sara, "Walking with a Ghost," which ended up with a 6 originally. It disappeared for nearly a month, and then it showed up on my doorstep again, holding its tune above its head John Cusack-style. Okay. I'm sorry I gave you a 6, little tune. As long as I'm not thinking about the haircuts of the people who sing you, I like you quite a lot. In fact, you might be an 8, because you're short and sweet and don't sound like much else. (listen at their myspace)

2) Black-Eyed Peas, "Don't Phunk with My Heart," which I tagged with a 4, but found myself singing while clipping hedges last weekend. And by singing, I mean, I couldn't stop myself from doing so. Arg. Fergie, I suspect that you are a dude, and your whine is really kind of awful, and there is something very wrong with the song, but evidence of stickiness provides pretty good evidence to the contrary. Fine. You jerkasses have done it again. Where is my cred gonna go? 7. (media player at their site; also video)

No, the Times ain't on it yet, but thanks to a timely email from eponymous, I certainly am. In the tradition of Catholic Parent magazine, I bring you this latest underwear innovation, which simply cannot be real. For one thing, the dude on the lefthand side of the "testimonials" page appears to be John McEnroe. Ask yourself, "Would John McEnroe have a problem a) with his daughter fucking around or b) controlling her if he did?" For another, good luck convincing your woman to wear these dowdy things. If she does so willingly, chances are she ain't showin' 'em off to anybody.

1) Commission chairs from northeast Georgia discussing what to do about ACTION. Even the Republicans seem to be trying to save it, which is heartening.

2) Police Training Center will move into old Athens Regional Youth Detention Center, to the disappointment of Advantage Behavioral Health, also a state agency, which hoped to use the space for mentally ill prisoners and as a youth emergency center, all of which seems to make more sense considering the building's division into cells.

3) Economist says Navy School closing will have minor impact on Athens economy, makes predictions for job creation next year: Athens won't have much, as per usual, and what does exist will mostly be in the area of government. Also, Oglethorpe County is technically part of the Athens metro area for these studies.

4) Another potential lieutenant governor.

5) Lovin' on the nickname.

6) Yeah, just give Adams the money. He deserves it. Also, more mischaracterization:

Many UGA Foundation members insist the rift that led to their group's demise came as a result of concerns about Adams' use of foundation funds, but an audit ordered by the foundation failed to convince the regents that blame for any serious fiscal shenanigans could be laid at the president's doorstep. The roots of the troubled relationship can more accurately be traced back to Adams' decision not to extend the contract of popular former UGA athletics director Vince Dooley, and the subsequent decision by some foundation members to flex some political muscle with the audit.

Because they can't both be true.

Failing to keep Adams in a position to do his job effectively carries the risk of hampering the school's ability to get those ever-more-important private dollars.

You mean, like the ones Foundation members are now refusing to give? Not antagonizing people is free, you know. Added: There's also this letter in the AJC, which reads:

The much-discussed 2003 report prepared by Deloitte & Touche at the request of the University of Georgia Foundation describes a falsified board of trustees resolution relating to future compensation to President Michael Adams. The document is signed by two foundation officers and certifies that the board adopted the resolution in February 2003. The report makes it clear the board never considered or adopted it.

I cannot understand why some authority (including Attorney General Thurbert Baker, the Clarke County District Attorney or the foundation board itself) has not investigated this falsified resolution. In the publicly held company world, it would set off alarm bells. Even if law enforcement officials did not become involved, the company itself would launch an investigation. Many publicly held companies today require employees to cooperate with such investigations, and such a policy (applied to UGA employees and foundation trustees) would have gone a long way toward getting to the bottom of the falsified resolution.

7) Brad Aaron corrects the way he was quoted wrt public transit.

8) Ryan Lewis says Athens music scene is close to dead.

[bugmenot ABH]

And survived. This morning, not yet awake but waiting for the bus, I saw rushing toward me at extremely high and bouncy speed, a squirrel, crossing Gaines School Road (between four and five lanes, depending where you are on it) in a friggin' hurry. Why? It was pursued by two birds, which swooped around it and seemed to peck at it. All this with plenty of oncoming traffic heading their way and they heading right in my direction. Nothing collided. Thank God for that. But I now think Yeats's rough beast should perhaps be modified to three very tiny ones, bobbing and weaving in feared anticipation of being squished by whitewalls.

I'm not particularly comfortable with over-attentive, aggressively friendly service in a restaurant. Maybe this is due to nigh on nine years in Athens, where you can consider yourself lucky if people don't actually spit in your food. Maybe it's simply that I understand that the best waiters are omnipresent without seeming so. Anyway. Team Brown has been to Carrabba's and has been thoroughly freaked out by the entire experience, from having the door opened for us both going in and out to feeling mobbed on entrance by three or four people who seem just to stand around the entrance to being served by both chirpy young waiter and some dude who may or may not have been the manager (this all leading to confusion) to the bit that almost made me lose control of myself: Usually, when people ask if you've been to their restaurant before and, if you say no, proceed to explain the menu, this means that there is something complicated about it, as with Craft, in NYC, for example, where you must choose your ingredients and preparation. It means there is something conceptual or otherwise out of the ordinary. What it does not mean is that the waiter should point to the antipasti section and explain that it consists of appetizers. I've been to a restaurant before, bub. You can save your breath. Two lessons learned, on the whole: 1) Carrabba's is nothing special. The food is not awful, but I can't see any reason to go back. 2) When they ask you if you've dined with them before, it is wise to lie and say "yes" even if you haven't. In the long run, it will save you trouble.

On my desk in two hours. Stat.

The reason this story was a problem is that E! hasn't polished their crystal ball lately. Yes, it's a reality TV couple that's involved, and yes, the girl is kind of slutty and the guy a little weird, and there's a hottie coming between them. I use Windex on my prognosticator of the future, though, and I see things a little differently. Coming soon, to a gossip blog near you...

Okay, they're not really famous or anything, but it was pretty unexpected to find Tim Schreiber and the rest of Col. Knowledge and the Lickity Splits at my local bagel haunt last Thursday. Unexpected 'cuz I live in Boston, you see. They had played a show the night before, and were loading up on some bagel sandwiches before shoving off to Pennsylvania. Good to see them.

Note that it is the context that is crucial here.

"Blue Orchid" video is up and streaming online, with Tori-like imagery. Very different from previous video efforts, but remains interesting. Jack's got kind of a musketeer thing going on, facial-hair-wise, and the cane gesturing is ringing a tiny bell in the back of my brain, but I haven't made the connection yet. Ideas?

1) Audit of Sheriff's Office says a) Edwards should fill the open positions first, and then b) should be allowed four new hires. ABH reports Heidi's position hasn't changed. Maybe because nothing else has.

2) Ready for your daily teeth-gritting? Headline reads, "Adams hopes foundation keeps up discretionary funds." No really. He still wants his $92+K for golf club memberships and the like despite being perfectly happy to have a new foundation and not particlarly so with the old. Admittedly, it's not like he spent all of that money last year, but still...

3) Mass grading restrictions next on the agenda.

4) Neighborhoods fighting over a bridge. Adrian covers at AthensWorld.

5) Thurmond's thinking about running for Lieutenant Governor, a move that wouldn't be a terrible one for him politically. I'd rather he move into a position with more actual power, but it would still be a step up. In other LG race news, somebody's pissing Reed off with emails alleging his consulting business isn't doing so hot.

6) ABH advises caution to Navy School redevelopment advisement authority, which I'm sure they're planning on.

7) Shipp thinks all the filibuster fuss isn't that important, paints the issue without mentioning the Supreme Court.

8) Letter writer explains why Heidi wasn't at BRAC press conference. Also: big freakin' deal!

9) All prisoners wants to take our wimmen.

10) Pete discusses the this-leads-to-that nature of local political races.

[bugmenot ABH]

How to get to your destination 

Do we call this a victory for feminism?

Assault: On May 21, deputies were called to a home on Rogers Road in response to an assault. When they arrived, a man in the house said Daisy Mae Priest, 62, had told him to get her a beer. When he refused, she picked up a knife and tried to stab him. During the struggle, he was cut on the arm. Deputy Shane Partain saw Priest sitting on a couch with blood on her hands. She was arrested for aggravated assault.

The length of this tale is what impresses:

Arrest: On May 16, Deputy Jay Parker was at the Oconee Connector when he saw a Toyota Avalon pass and noticed the passenger was not wearing a seat belt. When he turned on the blue light, the car didn't stop, so he turned on the siren and it still continued. Speeds got up to 65 mph and he noticed a lot of movement by the passenger. After nearly 3 miles, the car pulled over, and Parker exited with his gun drawn and ordered the passenger to the ground. He placed handcuffs on the passenger and he noticed several bags and some residue of a substance on the floor of the car. Deputy George Roberts arrived and pulled out a Quick strawberry milk container and poured it out. Some blue pills came out, but they were dissolving. A plastic bag also was stuffed in the milk. The deputies recovered some scales and three cellular phones. The driver, who falsely identified himself as Under Wilson, said he didn't know why those items were in the car, but he said he had been with a girl at the Perimeter Inn in Athens. The passenger said the drugs belonged to the driver. Deputies contacted Athens-Clarke police about the woman. The driver, James Robert Paul Miller, 24, of Rose Drive, Watkinsville, was charged with failing to yield to an officer, driving while his license was revoked. The passenger, Samuel Henry Wickster, 19, of Prince Avenue, Athens, was charged with not wearing a seat belt. Both suspects were charged with possession of methamphetamine with intent to distribute. In Athens, a police drug and vice unit officer went to the Perimeter Inn and arrested Ashley Brooke Yarborough, 20, of Loganville on charges of possessing marijuana and methamphetamine with intent to distribute.

All the rest.

1) SMN also buys that Perdue's staying out of the Regents/Foundation fight.

2) CertainTeed still trying to increase amount of pollutants (now by even more).

But the increased emissions would not significantly harm Athens' air quality, state regulators said after reviewing CertainTeed's first application.

Most of Athens' air pollutants come from such sources as the vehicles we drive, state officials say.

And y'all are doing a ton about that, right?

3) If we can't get rid of partisanship, we should reinforce it, says Perdue. What now?

4) ABH editorial criticizes Edwards for asking for that extra funding to hire more people when current positions are unfilled.

But a good heart and a good academic background don't necessarily combine to produce a good administrator. And there is reason to question whether Edwards has the skills needed to handle the serious responsibilities of his job, particularly with regard to management of the Clarke County Jail.

This isn't very fair. I believe Edwards's point is that the reason those positions aren't currently filled is that when they are, the jail is still understaffed, leading to stress and high turnover. Whether or not his request should be granted is another question, but it's not totally crazy.

5) Forum says we should think about not what the Navy School can do for Athens, but vice versa.

6) Letter writer seems to imply Athens would be better off without any schools.

7) A different one asks questions about what is being done to increase diversity at the graduate level at UGA. You mean the part of the university that's actually diverse to begin with?

8) Loran writes with much love about Chip Caray.

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot SMN]

All. I do apologize for not discussing the last episode of Cooking Under Fire, which has again sprung to mind. Summary is here. Short version: do not think for one second that if you win this competition it is anything more than an advertisement for Todd English's restaurants.

I understand well that a kitchen is run like a dictatorship, but dude, for Ming Tsai to tell Yannick Marchand that wearing sunglasses is a sign of disrespect (after Marchand had the balls to criticize the seasoning of a dish they were supposed to recreate for their challenge) was a clear display of power in abusive fashion. Yannick, I am Spartacus too. I admired much your sarcasm in your interview to the camera in closing, where you said that maybe if you oversalted your fish you too could be a celebrity chef in Vegas.

Rules seem to be changing from episode to episode. Sometimes neatness is important, other times not. Ditto for preparing one's dish within the time limit.

20) For a certain segment of the population, Nascar's raid on American culture -- its logo festoons everything from cellphones to honey jars to post office walls to panties; race coverage, it can seem, has bumped everything else off television; and, most piercingly, Nascar dads now get to pick our presidents -- triggers the kind of fearful trembling the citizens of Gaul felt as the Huns came thundering over the hills. [from NYT Book Review article "'Sunday Money' and 'Full Throttle': Nascar Nation" by Jonathan Miles, 05/22/05]

21) "My mom hates my music, but the other night one of the hostesses in the restaurant came in and was rocking out on her iPod and it was one of my songs, which was a big thrill," he said. "Now if I could just get her to throw her panties at me." [from "So Long, Garage Jammers. Nowadays Laptops Rock" by David Carr, 05/23/05. We also learn that "computers are the new garage." Not unless I can store my lawnmower in one, dude.]

[previously] [bugmenot NYT]

New Basement Jaxx video, this one for "U Don't Know Me" and featuring HRH QE II. Missed opportunities for corgi jokes mean it may rank a bit below "Oh My Gosh," but still is dancy and fits with what they've done so far.

Dear 24,

I'm very proud of you. You've learned well how to have things both ways, and this time you managed to do it without seeming too wussy. I only wish you'd had the guts/clearance to cut Jack's hand off, Skywalker-style, but I understand that the FCC has been a bit grandmaish lately. Maybe next season, eh?

Love,
Hillary

1) Crazy Frog, "Axel F" -- Yes. I am a little confused. But I am not all that annoyed. The revving of the voice is muted by the song itself. I'm not gonna head into 8 territory, like Mr. Barthel, but I'm not on board with the zero people either. A 4 seems about appropriate. (excerpt here)

2) John Williams & the London Symphony Orchestra, "Star Wars: Battle of the Heroes" -- Mike, if we're going to embrace the idea of pop, do we then have to embrace everything it incorporates? We are so still allowed to think some stuff sucks. Or not care about it. I don't listen to film scores on my own time when I could be listening to songs, which have words and much shorter structures. Am I saying I don't walk around the house singing the Imperial March sometimes? I most certainly am not. I'm just saying I don't care enough to bother to listen to more than a few seconds of this. Nor can I assign it an appropriate rating. (excerpt)

3) My Chemical Romance, "Helena" -- Another shocker in lack of coverage here. This is such an Aerosmith song in goth-emo-whatnot clothing. And therefore, it's perfectly listenable, if not excessively creative. 4. (will stream on their site)

4) The Bravery, "Fearless" -- So I wouldn't go out and buy this album, and it's all bla bla derivative and so on. That doesn't mean it's not a cute little tune. It's paced fast enough for me. It has good drums. It's hooky enough, if not to perfection. And this band is 2 for 2 in cool videos (plus, they have good hair). So not hating. 5. (video here if you register)

5) Daniel Bedingfield, "The Way" -- Gosh but it's hard to keep up with more than one pop scene. I do have a day job, you know? Anyway, I take it that this fella is sort of a Buble or Groban or something across the pond, so this is surprisingly cool for him. The loop on his website, without context, is indeed Coldplay-ish. It's faster, but also somehow less good than that band's stuff. Maybe it's just the yodel. 3. (his site)

6) Coldplay, "Speed of Sound" -- Coincidences, coincidences. Discussed and rated.

7) Audio Bullys v. Nancy Sinatra, "Shot You Down" -- Yay! But then... aw. There is a brief rush of enthusiasm, because the beat is very much fun, but it wears off in a hurry, leaving one feeling empty and craving better dance remixes. 3. (video here)

8) The Magic Numbers, "Forever Lost" -- Why am I so cranky and suspicious about this? It is rather as though The La's met the Mamas & the Papas, but the extreme catchiness of the former and the actual real singing abilities of the latter were dropped. Handclaps are nice. 3. (cutesy video that you will hate here)

9) British Sea Power, "Please Stand Up" -- Haven't cared yet. Apparently still don't. (video here)

10) Sons & Daughters, "Dance Me In" -- In what universe is this dance music? An angry pogoing one, I believe. Would mash up quite nicely with "Take Me Out" (call and response style), but is otherwise just not my thing. 3. (video here)

11) The Mitchell Brothers, "Harvey Nicks" -- Everything is rubbing me the wrong way, and this is contributing to it. It makes my brain hurt in a bad way, with the vocal rhythms not matching up at all with the underneath. Irritating. 2 for mild innovation alone. (video here)

12) Teedra Moses, "Be Your Girl" -- Amerie's tone without the clangy beat. Or maybe Tweet. Maybe too sophisticated and smooth for its own good. Or maybe I'm just too wound-up right now. 5. (video at AOL Music)

13) The Arcade Fire, "Power Out" -- Probably my favorite song of theirs I've heard. It's up-tempo and squeaky, with bells and vaguely Sabbathy guitar. Still, I wouldn't get it stuck in my head because there's not enough melody there. 5. (still here for download)

14) Gwen Stefani, "Hollaback Girl" -- I think my original 8 holds up as the appropriate rating. Because it gains, but then it loses a little over time, and the mix that goes with the video (which you'll see plenty right now) blurs and mutes the horns too much.

15) Amerie, "1 Thing" -- Talked about when it came out a few months ago, but not rated at any point. I think it's a solid 10. As good as "Crazy in Love."

The question is: Does 24's portrayal of torture normalize torture, or does the use of torture normalize torture? [bugmenot NYT]

No Katie Holmes?

1) Foundation can no longer officially raise funds in UGA's name post-split, but not much else will change legally.

2) OMG. Fifth-grade graduation dress-code quibbles! Because the whole idea of a graduation ceremony at the end of elementary school is incredibly important.

3) Ira Edwards wants more deputy positions, despite not being able to fill vacancies currently. Article establishes reasons for high turnover in the positions and explains that with more police on the streets making more arrests, there are also more inmates (ignoring the crucial step in between?).

4) Barrow not in favor of closing any bases, because we're at war. And will always be so?

5) It's irrelevant that Heidi wasn't at the announcement of the Navy School's closing. The important thing in this article is the blurb about showers possibly being installed in the ACC Courthouse for county employees who commute by bike. Hottness! Commission also has appointed 16-member panel to consider what should be done with 58-acre Navy School campus. But when did they do it? Back in February, despite saying there was no plan in place previous to announcement of closure. UGA officially interested.

6) Have not kept you up-to-date on ACTION story that has been ongoing. Short version: Feds not only anti-poverty, but also anti-anti-poverty. (This is glib. There do seem to be some problems with how ACTION was administered.)

7) More positiveness wrt Terry branch in Atlanta, despite $500K rent that they swear is covered by cost of programs.

8) ABH supports increase in public transit funding, at least to the extent that Carl Jordan proposed. That is, a pilot program to see if demand exists. (Gives props to BikeAthens.) Also, happy with retention of Meredith.

9) Responses to Jim's "Holy War" editorial. Huffy and misrepresentative.

[bugmenot ABH]

Put a checkmark by that bitch.

Saw my first Real Celebrity all by myself without someone pointing him out to me: Danny Masterson at Starbucks on Friday. Woo, that boy is some cute.

"Blue Orchid" : "Seven Nation Army" :: This* : "There's No Home for You Here"

Just because it ain't on the SAT these days doesn't mean the skill's not important.

*scroll down to below Poehler cleavage

Update: Whole damn album is streamable at Scenestars. I am resisting. Almost all the time, if you ask me if I would like some candy, I will say yes. Occasionally, I like to delay satisfaction. I believe I can hold out a few more weeks.

1) The Muppets' Wonderful Wizard of Oz: Eh... It was fine, especially for a TV production, but when 2 hours with multiple commercial breaks feels a bit draggy, you're not doing everything right. One fantastically amusing joke. And greatness from Fozzie. But no Rolf?

2) What the #$*! Do We Know!?: Annoying new-agey bullshit. I mean, Christ. I can deal with watching a movie where I don't agree with the ideology promoted, as long as it's an entertaining film, but this really isn't. Marlee Matlin plays a cranky bitch who becomes uncranky and magically happy once she decides to draw hearts on herself with an eyeliner pencil. Because of, um, quantum physics. Or something. We are all God, and we can control everything in the universe if we only make use of our entire brain? Apparently, you filmmakers have an answer to the question posed by your title. I, on the other hand, do not. And I don't particularly like my science and my religious mysticism mixing.

3) Incident at Loch Ness: Implausible fakeumentary about Werner Herzog making his own documentary at Loch Ness and the a-hole Hollywood producer who keeps trying to sex it up (casting a Playboy model in a bikini as the sonar operator, for example). Look, you really wouldn't buy this as an actual documentary for more than about five minutes. As long as just Herzog's onscreen, it could be one, since he's very natural, but the filmic devices used to make one think it's real actually detract considerably. The boom mic dips really obviously into the frame, for example. Not to mention the events that occur. None of this means I didn't mostly enjoy it though. It made me laugh sometimes, and the Blair Witch twist means there's slightly more to it than the average mock documentary. I wouldn't go into it expecting great things, and the insistence on maintaining the reality created is aggravating (commentary track in character), but it's a nice little flick, esp if you like Herzog.

4) Flight of the Phoenix (2004): Yep. It is a competent B-movie and then a touch more. Gorgeously shot; the moonlit scenes that seem to come just before dawn or after dusk are amazing looking, and the dunes as seen from above are practically Leanian. Money has been spent onscreen in appropriate places. Actors are for the most part competent enough. Ribisi's quite good (though there was a lot of theorizing that he was somehow a Nazi spy). There are implausibilities, and they do seem to spend an awful lot of time making signs instead of working on getting the damn plane off the ground, and the musical montage is kind of lame, but the whole thing works because nobody's trying for greatness, just to entertain you. Mission accomplished.

Don't give me any of that "I have a life and like to go out with my friends on Friday nights" crap. I know you don't.

Quentin Tarantino + Muppets = Solid fucking gold.

19) ''The next thing you know, I seen a lady run by in a bra and panties,'' said Charlie Fairbanks, owner of Executive Airport Engines, who was in a hangar when he heard sirens. ''A policeman grabbed her and threw her in back of an unmarked car. Right after that, we heard gunshots.'' [technically an AP story, titled "Suspect Charged in Kansas Bank Heist," 05/19/04; does this count or not? It is a pretty great occurrence.]

[previously] [bugmenot NYT]

1) Since Gwinnett will be its own college in 2008, UGA program there is being phased out.

When the UGA program began in 2002, the university did not know the regents would create a new college in Gwinnett County, said UGA Provost Arnett Mace.

Isn't the college being created there because the UGA programs have shown the demand for it? Some UGA programs will continue there, just not undergraduate-level ones, and they'll have to find a new space.

2) UGA will require the SAT writing scores, but not actually use them to make admissions decisions yet. They're going to see how they correlate with academic achievement here.

But UGA professors and instructors who teach freshman English courses said UGA freshman generally perform well on writing assignments.

"My experience is that freshmen at UGA are extremely well-prepared," said Bob Cummings, who has taught at other universities and now serves as the assistant director of UGA's First-year Composition Program.

Compared to what?

3) Clarke County school board votes to raise property taxes by a half mill. Why?

The state cut about $2.7 million of the money Clarke County should have gotten under student funding formulas for the 2005-06 budget. State mandated pay increases, health care cost increases and an increase in the number of required teachers increased the budget about $3.8 million over last year's budget, but the state only paid about $2.2 million toward those expenses, according to figures put together by school district staff.

4) ACC Commission does realize night and weekend bus service is needed or wanted. Credit to Dodson for speaking up in favor of it. In sidewalk display ordinance news,

A section of the ordinance banning the display of live animals concerned Commissioner States McCarter, who said it could allow merchants to display dead animals such as a skinned goat.

"That never occurred to me," said County Attorney Bill Berryman, who wrote the ordinance. "I think health regulations would take care of that."

5) Kidd will run for Kemp's seat.

6) ABH also likes Internets. Will miss Jean Spratlin. Loves heroes. Knows God does too (?).

[bugmenot ABH]

Boooo! I am not a fan of the new format, which requires much more reading and comprehending, and many fewer positions on the given songs. Revert, please. Damn the torpedos.

1) Coldplay, "Speed of Sound" -- Nothing too different here. Bigness but not vulgar bigness. A little more bass to it than I would expect, but much too classy without the purtiness that made "Yellow" very hummable. Also, the speed of sound is a lot faster than the tempo of this tune. 3. (I believe you may have to hit iTunes for this one. Or email me.)

2) Kelly Clarkson, "Behind Hazel Eyes" -- Ha! To say it is not "Since U Been Gone" is not to denigrate this song at all. Every song in the world except "Since U Been Gone" is not "Since U Been Gone." This grows on one slower, but the video is incredible (note specifically Goth fashion with torn-up black bodysuit and classic, classic use of water flying off the cymbals) and, again, the girl can fucking sing. Current favorite part? Insane belting of "anymore." World, beware. You are on the verge of being taken over completely. 8. (video and song at AOL music)

3) Foo Fighters, "The Best of You" -- Arr. I keep waiting for the melody to start, but it never does. It's not awful, and I could see it being played in stadia for a long time to come, but you can be angry and still have a tune. See above for example. Grohl can do much better than this. Video is very 1990s grunge, cutting between band rocking out and pseudo-profound images (a bride, a baby with its head being stroked, shots of a graveyard). That is not a good thing. 3. (also on AOL music and iTunes; I wish I had another source for you)

4) The Game, "Dreams" -- This is the first song off his album I heard, and I was favorably impressed. Y'all know I love the Kanye, and this is a nice, relaxed beat with a RZA tone. I'm not sure I have a great idea of what or who The Game himself is, but he knows good people. Lyrical flow a little slow-paced, but at least adequate if not better than that. 5. Because "Hate It or Love It" is a little better. (back to the same place at AOL music)

5) Fat Joe, "Get It Poppin'" -- By far the best Fat Joe track I've heard yet and that only because I really consider it a Nelly track. Nelly's on the song practically as much as fatty mcfatterson and does the little sing-songy bit that'll make it stick in your head. Uncomplicated dance song with rap bits occasionally referring too strongly to (or ripping off?) "Work It" in rhythm and structure. 4. (video at MTV; may work here too)

6) White Stripes, "Blue Orchid" -- Discussed, but not rated. I think I'm only going to give them a 5, and that's mostly credit for the riff. The hugeness of the sound is excellent, but the song's not creative enough. I will be expecting more of the album. (also listenable at AOL, if you hadn't heard it yet)

A Tale of Two Sisters: Better late than never, right? This only went MVP a week ago, so it's understandable that it's taken me a while to get around to it. Anyway. Scariness overrated considerably but still present in some parts, to the extent that even when you know something is coming, it can still make you jump. More about building that whole atmosphere of dread. It's got a very French look to it (the score too), quite stylish with the meadows and all that. At about ten minutes from the end, one is annoyed and a little frustrated in a "does this movie make any sense?" way, but then things get resolved. Sort of. There's still plenty that doesn't exactly add up (scenes from some characters' points of view, for example), but enough does to make it non-irritating. Possible Charlotte Perkins Gilman influence (i.e., what's with all the wallpaper?).

So that's what they've been up to... 

1) Fan 3, "Geek Love" -- So she's apparently this 17-yo chick version of the Beastie Boys, which is true in that her flow is really primitive, but her rhymes are much worse. It's all a nightmare, except that it's cute enough to work because a) the message is good, and b) the video is full of bright colors and dancing. Sure, it's been CW before that the geeks are about to inherit the earth (during the dot-com boom, for example), but between this and girls literally screaming at Jon Heder's hotness bc of Napoleon Dynamite, we may be entering a whole new phase. (Video is on her site, on this page)

2) Kings of Convenience, "I'd Rather Dance with You" -- Have been hooked on this song for months, but video may even improve it and goes nicely with that above. It's a fine line it's walking between fun and horribly cutesy, but I think it falls on the right side of that line because of the clear glee of the little ballerinas. That is, if we are saying that things are either Kidz Bop "Since U Been Gone" or Decemberists' "Sixteen Military Wives,"* it is mos def Kidz Bop. (choose the "audio/video" tab on their site)

*Ah. This is what people don't like about Wes Anderson. Except he, at least, keeps politics out of it and doesn't suggest diplomatic problems can be solved with tunes. (It is here.)

1) Regents to renew Meredith's contract, but there are rumors he may not last the year (not exactly undermined by repeated quotes saying he will).

2) Intelligent Design is insane and liberal says letter writer!

3) Other letter writer only wants benefits of university, not drawbacks.

4) Finally, some good press for the football program (and Mark Richt uses the word "awesome" in a way that is unclear whether he means "awe-inspiring" or "dudical").

5) No more bomb squad unit for ACC, since UGA has a more advanced one and can take over its duties. Will save $64K. Please note photo and caption.

6) ACC discovers Internets:

Future possibilities for so-called "e-government" including streaming video of commission meetings on the Internet, along with relevant documents and other information; or holding virtual town hall meetings where residents can chat with government officials, he said.

Local officials haven't discussed those possibilities, Davison said, because commissioners' laptops aren't capable of sending e-mail, and holding meetings on-line is a legal gray area. "It's an intriguing idea, but I'm not sure we're ready," she said.

Davison is proposing about $70,000 in the county's 2006 budget for an e-government coordinator, who would help maintain the county's Web site and design separate Web sites for county departments, Davison said.

Now hang on a cotton-pickin' minute. $70K? In this town?

[bugmenot ABH]

It is a marvelous idea, but missing, off the top of my head, greats like Jean Arthur, Bela Lugosi, and Donald Sutherland. And how do you include Woody Allen, but not Bob Hope?

Yeah. It's him on guest vocals.

There's not a ton that allows us poor souls without TiVo to feel superior to the people who do have it, but the constant bitching about this and that starting or ending a few minutes early or late provides some satisfaction. You love your show that much? Then schedule your life around it the same way I do. Does TiVo not allow you to set times like a VCR? Or have you not figured it out yet that the networks will do whatever they can to keep your ass on the couch? [bugmenot] [via]

Is that she's such a colossal fat-ass. I mean, her nickname is minivan. Problem officially solved.

1) You didn't think anyone could remix "1 Thing" and make it as good as it is already (and why even try)? Take that! Those of you especially who think the original is too stompy and loud may be fond of this version. [via]

2) On the other hand, if you woke up mad at your ears today, get back at them by subjecting them to Bruce Willis's version of "Under the Boardwalk." Make it stop! Please, lord. (In the same place is also a kind of yeh-yeh Asian version of "Buttons and Bows," which I love to begin with.)

Doesn't wear a dress.

1) Adams reports to Regents on Tate II.

The student fee will generate about $1.6 million a year for the next 30 years, enough to finance the Tate Center expansion, Adams said. Parking fees would pay for the garage, which would be free to students after 5 p.m. to try to relieve parking problems near the learning center.

"We think we have a satisfactory plan," he said. "We think we have satisfactory support from the students and the staff."

So 1.6 million times 30 = $48 million. If parking fees are paying for the garage ($16 million, according to Adams), and the total cost of the project is budgeted at $41 million, then what is the extra $24 million collected from students going to? Also, they're talking about a sales tax exemption on textbooks, which would save you, oh, $10 a semester. Whoop-de-doo. Other suggestions are better.

2) Foundation only has about $5 million not tied up, is not planning on giving it to the new foundation (as if). Some of it goes to scholarships, and they're saying they won't touch those. The rest?

This year's budget for the UGA Foundation's unrestricted funds also included nearly $400,000 to support the $500 million Archway to Excellence Capital Campaign and $92,300 in discretionary money for UGA President Michael Adams.

Somebody's not gettin' a new boat this year...

3) T.S., bike lane people. Commissioners are not supporting them being painted on Milledge.

"I believe the culture we have, we'll never have a lot of people riding bikes," Athens-Clarke Commissioner States McCarter said.

"This idea of people riding bikes is a dream. People in my area (southeastern Clarke County) will never ride a bike to the University of Georgia."

Um... you do read the paper, right, States?

4) Navy School people seem to stay inside their palisade.

5) That first Georgia Power hike? It wasn't the only one.

6) Yay! Public works are cool.

7) Another qol letter calls ABH "smugly superior." Because that totally doesn't describe the Friends of Five Points or anything. And this one provides the cautionary example of Tuscaloosa.

8) "New Park" to get name.

9) Where is the line drawn in Oconee County?

10) Pete tries to make peace between ABH and Heidi, because he likes them both and thinks they're all nice people; says former should talk to latter more, which is maybe true, but doesn't really grant that sometimes ABH is right and judges on actions more than words.

[bugmenot ABH]

Someone's writing about the Charmin ads that have been running for a few years now, you know, the ones that answer the age-old question we like to use as a substitute for "nuh duh." The answer, apparently, is yes, but far more neatly than you might imagine.

I don't read Creative Loafing very often these days, but when I do, I realize how much I miss their man-on-the-street section and how we could use something like it in Athens. This week? Revenge of the Sith. Your theories as to the part that made me guffaw are welcome.

We're going to have to have a talk here, Dan. 1 and 4? Not a good record for anyone, and certainly not for a closer. I understand that bad luck happens, but there's a point where, statistically, it's more likely that you suck.

Seriously. Don't.

Harassment: On May 12, a female resident of Price Mill Road in Bishop reported she received a telephone call from a Texas woman, who threatened to come to Georgia and "stomp her. ..." She also called her some names.

Cover-up not effective, part 1:

Arrests: On May 12, Deputy Brad Williams came up on a Chevrolet Yukon traveling 75 mph on U.S. Highway 78. When he stopped the vehicle, he smelled the strong odor of cologne and the slight odor of marijuana. The driver, Demetrius Dowdy, 24, of Stapler Road, Athens, got out and Williams frisked him. He found $2,077 in cash on Dowdy, in numerous bills including 10 $100 bills and 16 $20 bills. The passenger, Nicholas Antione Rowe, 36, of Rustwood Drive, Athens, also was patted down and he was carrying $206. A bottle of liquor was found under the passenger seat and some marijuana was found in the console. Dowdy was charged with speeding and possession of marijuana and Rowe was charged with possessing marijuana and having an open container of alcohol.

Cover-up not effective, part 2:

Arrest: On May 14, Deputy Marvin Williams was in a parking lot of Oconee State Bank on Old Macon Highway when he saw a car drive into the nearby Arbor Express store. Williams knew the driver, Willie Gene Ambers, 46, of Moreland Heights, Watkinsville, didn't have a license. As Williams got on his radio, Ambers walked to a vehicle at the gas pumps and got into the passenger seat and Williams told him to get out. "I'm just talking with my friend," Ambers replied. He was charged with driving while his license was suspended and obstruction.

The rest.

Boston's "Life in the Pop Lane" columnist wants her Chappelle's Show now, dammit! [bugmenot] [via]

1) Regents meeting, but most likely not doing anything.

This month's committee agendas include run-of-the-mill items such as authorizing construction, and rental projects and making administrative appointments.

But, two potentially significant items do appear on committee agendas: the presentation of the University System's annual financial report and discussion of textbook costs.

2) Navy School closing will lead to psychological pain?

3) Alice Kinman responds to previous editorial about quality-of-life ordinances.

This newspaper has consistently framed the issue of quality of life as a residents-vs.-students issue. Yet this is a flawed argument. It suggests that most, if not all, of the 20,000 students who live off campus would prefer a town with decaying neighborhoods and a polluted environment. I have spent more time around University of Georgia students than perhaps anyone on the Banner-Herald editorial staff, and I can say with some authority this is a ludicrous idea. The loudest objections to quality-of-life enforcement come from those who profit by the students' presence, not the students themselves.

Well, yes, but they don't respond to much of anything, do they? It's not like students are agitating for qol ordinances.

4) ABH piles on wrt Newsweek.

5) Perdue's vetos summed up by MNS correspondent, who says they're consistent with his philosophy of smaller government. A philosophy that seems to come and go as desired.

6) Letter writer agrees with Smith on hotel-motel tax, thinks local govt is all tax and spend.

[bugmenot ABH]

Oh thank God there's a bit of a break here, with Stylus listing the top 50 and bottom 10 U.S. singles they've covered this year so far. I will say I'm surprised "Drop It Like It's Hot" made it to #1, but people seem to dig that song a lot more than I do.

As far as the U.K. edition is concerned...

1) Oasis, "Lyla" -- Snore. I'm not gonna cop to Oasis hate. They make some good tunes. This is not awful, but super-duper meh. You know how I don't care about U2? I don't care about this in the same way. 3. (Pops up when you visit their site)

2) Turin Brakes, "Fishing for a Dream" -- Am not hating it, because I like acoustic arpeggios and the melody is not bad. Cranky Mikey says no one is allowed to start off with an acoustic guitar and vocals except Leonard Cohen, but he is wrong. Acoustic guitar is pretty. Admittedly, the lyrics are bad and so is the video (dude #1, shave your head; dude #2, would you please take off that scarf?), but those who say it's lesser Belle & Sebastian are kinda right. 4. (it's on their site)

Motherfuck! Explorer crashes. Here's the redo.

3) Jennifer Lopez feat Fat Joe, "Hold You Down" -- Covered and rated.

4) Black-Eyed Peas, "Don't Phunk with My Heart" -- Ditto.

5) Kaiser Chiefs, "Everyday I Love You Less and Less" -- Aww, it's not so bad. It's kind of cute and new wavey. I could potentially jump around to this at a party with a few drinks in me, but they're no Futureheads. 4. (horrible video here)

6) Rob Thomas, "Lonely No More" -- It is only a matter of time until it infects you too. Like the BSB/N Sync beat on the verse and the "woos" from both keyboards and people. Really don't want to like the song, yet sing it to myself already. Minus points for his dancing in the video. Ugh. 5. I hate myself. (video here)

7) Hot Hot Heat, "Goodnight Goodnight" -- Covered and rated.

8) Javine, "Touch My Fire" -- Doesn't live up to the title in the slightest. Obligatory pancontinental touches don't a good song make. And I like Eurovision. 2. (streams automatically at her site)

9) New Order feat Ana Matronic, "Jetstream" -- Just not my thing and never has been. I think it sounds dated and not dancy enough. 3. (video here)

10) Sleater-Kinney, "Entertain" -- Halvsies. I like aspects of their music (drums, pace) and dislike others (guitars, it can be a little yelly). Also, they appear to be trying to say something, which, icky. 3. (video here)

11) Mylo, "In My Arms" -- Not enough of a song here. Mike writes about how it's all intro, and that's true, but he likes that and I don't so much. I keep waiting for stuff to start. This confirms that I am impatient. It is good background music. 4. (video and more on his site)

12) Stevie Wonder feat. En Vogue and Prince, "So What the Fuss" -- I will say that I think it's really cute how much Mike likes this song. I enjoy it, but it is no "Superstitious." It is no a lot of things. Because he is aging, and therefore it is more mellow, though still with nice keyboard sounds. It makes you want to sit around with a lemonade more than dance kung-fu fighting stizz. 6. (video and, yes, video with audio description from Busta Rhymes here)

13) Trick Daddy, "Sugar" -- Another one I'm surprised I didn't cover when it came out here. Kicks "Candy Shop"'s ass all kinds of ways. Nice sample, actual candy-making in video (!), and I am an admitted fan of Trick Daddy, who has got charisma to spare, and a style that I think combines aspects of both South and Chicago flows. 6. (video on ifilm)

14) Eels, "Hey Man Now You're Really Living" -- Mix (just for video?) rather frustrating. Bits where he doesn't sing (or at least drops back) and the chorus comes in are much better. Video very annoyingly wacky and, I believe, is biasing me against the song. Something's ringing false about it. 3. (video on this page on their site)

15) Antony and the Johnsons, "Hope There's Someone" -- Yes, the voice is interesting, but it's not clicking with the "love" part of my brain yet. And when people are saying things like "Listening to Antony's voice is like hearing Elvis for the first time: two words and he has broken your heart . . . when he sings it is the most exquisite thing that you will hear in your life" (Laurie Anderson), it is hard not to have expectations. Intriguing but not punch-to-the-gut great. 5. (video here)

Are lovely. Images are too, but sometimes they don't live up to their brief descriptions.

e.g., Fire knocker tank.

Also, this is a thing, not a dude. Whew.

So, I may have seen everything on LD's list of universals (fist pump!), but as provoked by this discussion, there are still a few major flicks I haven't notched yet. These are on my list in a big way:

Being There
The Birth of a Nation (Have seen a good chunk of it more than once, but never completed)
Breathless (I could include some other Godard, like Alphaville, but I'm not exactly raring to go on that one)
Day for Night
Eraserhead (really wanted to see this on the big screen or at least a really, really nice print)
Fatal Attraction
Freaks (not exactly a classic; I'm just surprised I haven't seen it)
Marathon Man
Metropolis
Night of the Living Dead
Nosferatu (see Birth of a Nation)
On the Waterfront (the highest-ranking film on the AFI list that I haven't seen; I'm at 94/100)
Ordinary People
Out of Africa
Rashômon (also Ran; this is just silly, since I've seen at least six Kurosawas, just not these two)
Rio Bravo
Scarface (have seen the original; one of my last few De Palmas)
The Seventh Seal (also Persona; I kind of suck on Bergman)
Terms of Endearment

So this is not so terrible. It's just something to work on. I'm sure there's some cult classic that everyone's seen and I haven't, but I haven't come up with it yet.

Salon establishes yet again that TV is not real. But doesn't ask: Why is everyone who works at CTU pretty darn hot? Sure Audrey Raines was a little horsey, but she was DOD. And the techies, not so much. But on the whole, that is one good-looking workplace. Does flawless make-up help you fight terrorism better?

So-so much stuff to catch up on. Will try to be brief.

1) Foundation round-up: Head of Development Committee resigns. Adams wants real-estate foundation to be independent. This is one of the few areas in which the current Foundation actually has a little bit of clout. For now. Chances are that, rather than make the existing real-estate foundation independent, a new one will be formed. Note this: although Chitty has technically been fired, she will still earn $23K a month as a consultant. In addition to her $285K severance package.

2) 20% of incoming freshman to be non-white, potentially. ABH says, "good progress." True dat.

3) Navy Supply Corps School closing. In this corner, the 500-lb monster known as UGA. In the other, the relatively svelte but feisty ARMC. Who will win the battle for the land? Barrow certainly alludes to this:

"We're fortunate in that the Navy school is prime real estate in a community that's experiencing a tremendous amount of economic growth," Barrow said. "So, if the defense department makes a mistake, Athens will not suffer as much as others. In fact, we might actually come out of this pretty good.

"But we recognize the Navy School is an economic engine that's already in place, it serves the community well and, more importantly, serves our nation better here than it can anyplace else," Barrow added.

while saying he'll fight the good fight. ABH says there's a shot at keeping it open and here.

4) ACC Commission grills Smith wrt hotel-motel tax. ABH says, "Make a sign ordinance that works and make it fast." Letter writer says to hell with what the public wants.

5) Contenders for Kemp's seat.

6) Perdue speaks at graduation, tells students to do helpful things, makes Pope/Kaufman reference. Doesn't sound like anyone booed.

Perdue and Adams clashed over money when Perdue proposed budget cuts in 2003 and 2004, but at the ceremony Adams lauded Perdue's "forward-looking programs and initiatives," and thanked him for fully funding UGA this year. Other than a graduate who waved a Perdue campaign sign, politics were kept to a minimum. Adams gave Perdue a gift after his speech, joking that it was "within the new ethical guidelines" Perdue approved.

Ethics are hilarious. You know what else is awesome? Making a speech about charity while signing into law legislation designed to pick on the poor.

7) Barrow will always represent the people of this community, despite his choice, um, not to. Also, interesting mayoral race speculations. Chasteen? Sims?

Most observers think at least two challengers will emerge: One of a group of lawyers, such as Jeff Rothman, Dean Clark or Regina Quick, who are upset with Davison over the Municipal Court judge controversy and what they see as overzealous ordinance enforcement, and a pro-business, Chamber of Commerce-backed candidate.

8) And Jim thought he got a lot of letters about the bike column. Hoo boy...

9) Shipp doesn't favor reopening Williams case. I think statements like this

Today, metro Atlanta is awash in violent crime. Local TV news has turned into little more than a daily recital of drive-by killings, domestic homicides, kidnappings, rapes, robberies, etc.

are not only inaccurate but dangerous.

10) ACC Tax Commissioner Denson explains why she thinks HB 501 (reorganizing DMVS) is a bad idea.

11) A Hull of a place to live.

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

So all I hear about Of Montreal, even from people who like their last two albums, is that they went through a shitty period. Hmm. But after making use of the listening guide thingies at Barnes & Noble this weekend, I am curious what that supposedly shitty period is. Hassiotis passed on The Gay Parade. Team Brown went ahead and purchased Coquelicot Asleep in the Poppies. Neither of these is shitty at all. Am not sure that they live up to heart-ache provoking fabulousness of Sunlandic Twins (or Satanic Panic), but motherfucker. This is good stuff. Also listened to bits of Cherry Peel and Aldhils Arboretum and appear to like those too (the former would've been purchased if it were there, but it was not). I'm not entirely calling bullshit yet, but I'm on the verge of forming the B.

For now, until YSI expires, y'all can resolve the first cliffhanger and discover a second. All this = "Trapped in the Closet (Part 2 of 5)" is making the rounds. Here is the picture I like to think of as an illustration for the song. Oh, R. You do not disappoint.

Update: New source.

Notes on an Arby's experience, strongly featuring the Reuben, as previously discussed.

1) Arby's is surprisingly expensive. The Reuben combo is $6.99. Not a ton by sit-down standards, but far more than most fast food.

2) The one located on Barnett Shoals is insanely UGA-themed inside, decorated in red and black and with a plexiglass pyramid containing some (kind of lame) memorabilia.

3) There is a bell you can ring if you thought you had great service. A child did so while we were there.

4) The sandwich itself is large, maybe 5 x 8 x 2", maybe even bigger.

5) It's supposed to be toasted, but in fact it has barely been so. This is the main problem with the sandwich: it's too squishy. It compresses considerably under light pressure, and the bread sticks to the roof of your mouth. You don't have to grill a Reuben, but you could at least make the bread a bit crunchy.

6) The corned beef is tasty and the Thousand Island plentiful. The Swiss is also nice.

7) The crucial sauerkraut factor: they have wussed big. You can taste it a little, but it's hard to locate in the sandwich, and there's not nearly enough, certainly not a good handful as is suggested by the pictures in the ads.

8) You get a choice of fries? Madness, I say.

Yet more on this whole pop culture makes you smart thing, from Malcolm Gladwell in the New Yorker. Howevs, one thing I'm getting mighty tired of is this:

To watch an episode of “Dallas” today is to be stunned by its glacial pace—by the arduous attempts to establish social relationships, by the excruciating simplicity of the plotline, by how obvious it was. A single episode of “The Sopranos,” by contrast, might follow five narrative threads, involving a dozen characters who weave in and out of the plot.

Dallas comes up over and over again (presumably because it's in the book?) as an example of old, dumber TV. But y'all, I've been watching Dallas, and such a characterization is grossly unfair. There is less plot than in 24. But this is the case of almost every show ever aired, and it doesn't mean that there's not plenty going on. There are lots of things that aren't spelled out. There are long arcs. There are knowing looks exchanged between characters. There are plenty of relationships to keep in one's head (so and so is married to so and so, who used to date so and so, who's now going out with the first so and so's ex-boyfriend, and they all live on the same compound!). Pick another example, jerkasses.

God but it's been forever since I was able to post one of these. That is what happens when life interferes with entertainment. So:

1) Arrested Development, season 1: Oh fine, damn it. You were all pretty much right, and Team Brown actually did end up getting into it, though it took about the whole first disc to reach that point. Now I will be mildly annoyed if it's canceled, and I'll admit that it's one of the best sitcoms currently airing. It does err a bit toward surreal for surreal's sake, especially earlier on, but things come together nicely as it progresses. Here's a question, people who are big fans: Do you think you like it at least partially because of the continuous narrative, which is the main thing that differentiates it from other sitcoms (and even some, like Friends, make use of that device relatively frequently)? I do think it's odd that everyone acts as though it's the most out-there, nontraditional sitcom ever, and yet it's the characters that end up drawing you into the show. I.e., it has much more in common with Everybody Loves Raymond than with The Simpsons. [Update: Hmm. Team Brown = tipping point?]

2) Curb Your Enthusiasm, season 3: Larry David is one of the few people who can make me cry from laughing. He managed to do it again in season 3's final episode. One important thing about this show and specifically his character is the primacy of the funny. It's what gets him into trouble over and over again. If he thinks something's funny, it's impossible for him not to express it, because even if it's offensive or whatever, he thinks other people share his appreciation of the amusing. Unfortunately, they mostly don't. This is the tragedy of the easily amused.

3) Sada: So a bazillion times better than In the Realm of the Senses, which covers the same story. This gets a little draggy toward the end, but it's mostly very visually exciting and has a more comic take on the material. It's also stagy in a good way. That is, there are lots of presentations that remind one of a play. One scene in particular, when Sada plays the shamisen during the great earthquake, is practically worth renting the movie for.

4) Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason: Meh. Amps up flaws of previous film (way too soundtracky, obvious), while not providing enough compensation in form of bad boy Hugh Grant. The first one is forgettable, but pleasantly so. This one isn't unpleasant, but it isn't the opposite of that, and it's even less memorable.

5) The Final Cut: The kind of movie that seems like it should have come out in theaters and quite possibly did, and yet, I have no memory of it doing so, which I ordinarily would. Nice to see Robin Williams doing his affectless thing (much preferred to mania or cuddliness or, god forbid, cuddly mania). More a good idea than a great execution, and it is a good idea, but the film doesn't go the places you want it to go or explore the things you want it to, limiting itself to a less interesting story. It's mostly classy, but (therefore?) lacks oomph. (If you want to know more about the idea, you might want to read this NYT review.)

Who has begun to debate his book, Everything Bad Is Good For You: How Today's Popular Culture is Actually Making Us Smarter, with Dana Stevens in Slate. What is strange is that someone currently working as a TV critic would write the following:

Quantitatively speaking, our brains may well be evolving so as to take in, sort, and make sense of more information than ever before in human history. But what is TV leading us to think about? Consider the complicated plotlines on a show like 24: Perhaps, as you argue, they require more of the viewer than Starsky & Hutch once did. But mostly, it seems to me, 24 trains us to tolerate ever-increasing levels of stimulation, distraction, and finally, a docile receptivity to increasingly implausible plotlines (not to mention some pretty dubious stereotypes). One man's mental challenge can be another's hamster wheel.

Her original response is better, but still. It kind of sounds like she should be reviewing video games instead, based on enthusiasm.

But lest you think it will be all fun and games and watching MTV with my feet up on the coffee table, know that it is in fact adult life intruding yet again. I will be waiting for the tree dudes to come and paint my tree's wound and cut parts of it off. Am sure it will prove exciting as all get out.

Dark's memed.

1) ABH says more are stopping donations as uncertainty of Foundations continues. Did I miss who? Or does it not say? Justice Norman Fletcher, head of Arch Foundation, wants kissy-kissy. Perdue's not saying a damn thing, maintaining the appearance of not being involved.

2) ABH comes out and says it: it's a frigging college town, and the Commission should maybe get a grip on that fact. This doesn't, of course, apply to the smoking ordinance, despite the fact that it too could be characterized as "quality-of-life." Also, sidewalk display ordinance crafted and to be voted on next month, even though it makes everyone unhappy:

Lea, owner of the East Clayton Street store The Art of It All, said she is fed up with county regulations and is removing two famed frog statues from the front of her store.

"I'm tired of the city and all their crazy stuff," Lea said. "They change the rules every two days.

"If anybody wants to come by and take pictures with the frogs, they can do it this week," she said. "After that, I'm taking them down."

3) Giant scoreboards will pay for selves through advertising. So they say.

4) Kemp wants to run for agriculture commissioner, though he's not confirming it yet. Fine by me. Get him out of Athens's hair.

5) Perdue signs Volunteer Medicine Act, exempting doctors who aid the needy from lawsuits in those cases.

6) State employees who smoke and want health insurance will have to pay $40 extra a month beginning July 1. UGA is on a different plan, but teachers and many others aren't.

Burgess said it's unclear exactly how much money the tobacco surcharge will raise because the state does not know how many of its employees or their spouses smoke. Perdue's initial recommendation of a $9 per month surcharge estimated a savings of $1.7 million in insurance costs. Legislators increased the surcharge to $27, which would have raised $5.1 million.

...Tim Connell, director of the state Office of Planning and Budget, said the surcharge was raised to $40 because the legislators' plan still left a $4 million hole in the health program's budget. The final decision was made by staffers in the governor's office, Community Health and Connell's office.

All this is is a way to push a lot of people off the state health plan to save money, and it's pretty transparent.

7) John Barrow, proud Democrat, wants to build up the military structure (or at least not close a base in his district).

8) Letter writer says fund public transit, dammit.

9) You thought you were pissed about Chitty's compensation before? That bang-bang is the sound of the door on her way out and a sack of cash being dumped in front of her.

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

Or is this a coincidence. Story at the Agonist points to this piece on new pope's coat of arms (pictured here), which contains a brown bear with a pack on its back:

Finally, a brown bear loaded with a pack on his back lumbers up the upper right-hand section of the shield.

The bear is tied to an old Bavarian legend about the first bishop and patron saint of the Diocese of Freising, St. Corbinian. According to the legend, when the saint was on his way to Rome, a bear attacked and killed his horse. St. Corbinian punished the bear by making him carry the saint's belongings the rest of the way to Rome.

Archbishop Cordero Lanza di Montezemolo said the bear symbolizes the beast "tamed by the grace of God," and the pack he is carrying symbolizes "the weight of the episcopate."

The pope said in his 1997 autobiography: "Meanwhile, I have carried my pack to Rome and wander for some time now through the streets of the Eternal City. When release will come I cannot know. What I do know is that I am God's pack animal, and, as such, close to him."

Shins, Decemberists, Spoon Head Believer Comp. What? The Arcade Fire was too busy?

This discussion about context/lack of it, far from going gentle into that good night, has hopped vigorously over to Al's place. Three and counting.

As per discussion last night with Mr. Brown resulting from list meme, esp wrt musical heroes, new term has arisen to describe the moments in an artist's career when he/she/it produces something almost irredeemably bad, i.e., cornily produced, packed with groan-worthy lyrics even by my standards, destined to be or already extremely dated, all-around cheeseball. This term is "Jazz Police" or "Jazz Police moment."

Those of you who are Leonard Cohen fans know automatically what that means, as "Jazz Police" is by far the biggest blemish on the man's long and worthy career (much more so than Death of a Ladies' Man). That is, you become embarrassed for him as you listen to it. None of this, of course, means that you're not allowed to like the song. You often will, in a part of you that you want to smother with a pillow. Lou Reed has a great many of them ("Disco Mystic," "Original Wrapper"), contested only perhaps by John Cale in sheer number ("Fighter Pilot," "Honi Soit," pretty much all of Last Day on Earth). Both The Who ("Did You Steal My Money?") and Pete Townshend solo (most of White City) have 'em too. Really, it's difficult to find important, prolific musicians with long careers who don't. Lennon is a bit of an exception, but 1) he was shot, and 2) he was shot, crucially, in 1980, before the decade that produced so many "Jazz Police."

The other point here is that having your "Jazz Police" really isn't a bad thing. In fact, it's kind of endearing, in the way you might occasionally reflect on your parents' embarrassingness when not actually experiencing it. I.e., Flaws lead to affection.

Other examples? Corollaries? Contention?

Stereogum links to Kidz Bop video for "Since U Been Gone," providing another entry in the animal costume ledger. Slowed down instrumental break bits are particularly great. Anyone hit her show at the Fox last week? Most likely not, so we can pretend she did indeed have a walrus drummer.

Flagpole apparently doesn't publish reviews of ancient albums. So here's the Akon review I wrote that can't make it in.

Here’s a shortcut to getting where Akon falls. The album is called Trouble. The song on it that seems to provide the name is called “Trouble Nobody.” Yes, there’s one of those parental advisory signs on the cover, the font is sort of tough looking, and he’s not wearing his shirt, but Akon’s not much more threatening than Usher and about equally sweet and listenable. Sure, the dude’s done jail time, but it’s so hard to buy. Born and raised in Senegal, then immigrated to New Jersey, Akon still has the tone of Afropop in his vocals combined with the smoothness of modern R&B. His first two singles, “Locked Up” and “Ghetto” (again with tough titles and topics, but repetitively nice soul-influenced beats and great use of his voice; “Locked Up” has the best gate clanging sample since “Thriller”) charted mildly, but “Lonely,” his third, seems guaranteed to work its way into your shower singing. Built around a chipmunked-up Bobby Vinton sample (What? You thought only Kanye could do that?) that kicks it off, the song then drops in a silky, twinkly beat, a touch of narration, and lovelorn lyrics, all coming together in the chorus. Is it twee-B? In a way, but there’s also something soulful here that puts Akon above, say, Har-Mar Superstar. There are some less interesting songs on the album (“When the Time’s Right” is pretty undifferentiated), but the unselfconscious mish-mash of instruments, the vague fuzziness of production, and that pretty pretty voice add up to a disc suitable for junior-high slow dancing and mooning over both girls and injustice. Mr. Raymond, you might want to take a look in the rear-view mirror.

1. The good: The theme of the Mentos commercial that is currently running. Yes, it is full of birds, and they want Mentos and communicate with one another in a way that pushes my freak-out buttons, but the song, complete with all its weird tweets and squeaks and quacks, is good enough to have given me thoughts of including it in my instrumental top 5 (this week, at any rate). I can't exactly sing it to myself, but I can play it in my brain and nod along. (It's apparently "No Limit" by 2 Unlimited, but doesn't have the bird noises in the original.

2. The bad: Damn you, Ford Focus. I cannot go around singing "with my 35 mpg," which rhymes with "five-year warranteeee." It is rare that I will admit that catchy can be bad, but in this case it is. It's using parts of my brain I would rather devote to Kelly Clarkson.

1) One Foundation member (ex-head and big supporter of Adams) resigns. His doing so would seem to weaken the Foundation and reinforces the split between the Adams folks and the Foundation folks.

2) Parkway Group has some new options wrt 316 and tolls, including discounts for some. Of course, with all this secrecy in place, we no doubt won't know what's going on until it's official.

3) UGA and Tech pushed hardest for donor shield bill, "even as they recognized they would be criticized." Because it was the right thing to do?

4) State budget signed, with a few line-item vetoes:

Perdue, also a Republican, said he wasn't entirely happy with the $3.5 million worth of special projects which GOP House leaders inserted into the spending plan, but decided to let the items stand as "a special dispensation to first-time appropriators."

He said House and Senate leaders have promised him they will devise a more formalized way of distributing special projects - often derided as pork-barrel spending - by next year's session.

Also, abortion 24-hour-waiting period bill signed. Wait, wait, I'm sorry. The "Woman's Right to Know Act."

5) Ted fucking Olson speaking at Law School graduation.

6) ACC commission wants to change responsibility for prosecution of ordinance violations from an elected official to one hired by the commission. There are a lot of points made about efficiency, and these do seem valid. It's just that combined with the Simpson/Giese thing, it does seem that the ACC doesn't want these ordinance enforcer to have much independence. Is that unfair? If so, it's their own damn fault.

7) Holy hell, is ABH supporting the school funding lawsuit against the state? Sure, the insane sale tax funding idea comes up again, but only briefly. It stops short of saying "sue the fuckers," but it's in the ballpark.

8) Shipp tells GA Democrats not to be distracted from actually winning by focusing on narrow-appeal issues (even if they're valid).

9) Heh. Greg Benson points out the irony of appointing a developer (Kemp) to the State Forestry Commission.

10) Swain has to serve a 45-day sentence for continuing to drive. Richt's going to catch some heat for not suspending him:

Richt said Swain will be disciplined internally. He has indicated in the past that misdemeanor traffic violations did not rise to the level of game suspensions.

"With the time in confinement, Darrius is paying a heavy price for his license violations," Richt said in a statement. "Hopefully, he has learned an important lesson."

They're trying to get him a place closer to campus, too.

11) "Something interesting happened around noon May 7 while some women were having lunch at the Crimson Café in downtown Watkinsville." Overstatement?

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

  You read the signs it posts in its windows. Enlarge to read.

Gosh but it is nice when the universe decides to spin the right way. Here, nice people. Have some money. Confirmation, though, that all that hoo-ha about adoption at the orphanage was pretty much just that, i.e., for the cameras. Howevs, is it not a bit unfair to strip the last-place team in the penultimate leg (which is really part of the last leg) of possessions and money? That is a major disadvantage. Also: how do none of these people know how to chop an onion properly. I would've smoked everyone on that particular challenge. During soft-focus Ramber: The Wedding lovefest ad, Mr. Brown comments, "I'll watch Rob & Amber: The Divorce." Wouldn't we all?

Yard stuff thief active once again:

Theft: On April 29, a resident of Arborwood Ridge near Bishop reported someone entered his yard and stole a flagpole and two flags, together valued at $40. One flag was green with a rabbit picture. The man said this is the third time in a year someone has stolen something from his yard. Previously, thieves had taken another flag and two concrete bulldogs. (The man told the Banner-Herald "I've worked hard for what I've got and it kind of *** me off that someone would come and take the stuff. It's not the value. They weren't that much. It's just the principle.")

Theft: On May 6, a resident of Astondale Road reported someone stole two 2-month-old billy goats from his home. The goats, both brown and white, are valued at $65 each.

Explanation is awesome:

Threat: On May 4, a Watkinsville reported he was pulling out of a gas station on Greensboro Highway shortly after 9 a.m. when another car zoomed through a traffic light. The man said the driver of the car began shouting obscenities and shot him the bird (a gesture using the middle finger and considered vulgar). The man then passed him and slammed on his brakes. The culprit then held up what appeared to be a BB pistol. The victim contacted the sheriff's office and Deputy Scott Underwood caught up with the car near a fire station in the lower part of the county. Underwood frisked the driver, placed him in cuffs and searched the car. He found a BB pistol, which the man admitted he shook in the air at the other man. Ryan McPherson Stansell, 19, of Pleasant Hill Church Road, Winder, was arrested for pointing a pistol.

You should be training for this:

Arrest: On May 7, Deputy James Hale was dispatched to a party on Daniells Bridge Road about 3:30 a.m. When he pulled up, a bunch of people ran for the woods while others ran into the house. Hale went inside the home and got all 19 people to congregate in the living room. He took down their names and had all the remaining alcohol poured out. As he was leaving the scene, he spotted one of the people who ran, so he chased the person. He managed to capture him when he fell in a creek. David Anthony Glessing II, 19, of Oconee Crossing Circle, Watkinsville, was charged with underage possession of alcohol.

There is one part of this that is confusing:

Arrest: On May 3, deputies were summoned to Wal-Mart after a shoplifting suspect ran after being confronted with a theft. The suspect was seen with a 1998 Ford Explorer in the parking lot, which was towed after deputies could not locate him. The suspect's wallet, which included his driver's license, was found inside the vehicle. Security told Deputy Jason Lowe they observed the suspect in the store with a cart containing groceries. He put the items into Wal-Mart bags which he already had, then exited the store. When they confronted him, he ran and was last seen running down Epps Bridge Parkway toward Athens. Sometime later, a woman reported to deputies she had been in Wal-Mart looking around "for pleasure," when she returned to her Ford Explorer and it was gone. They asked if she knew the suspect and she said no. However, Lowe confronted her about lying about the suspect. Lowe already had found out the suspect was driving the Explorer on March 30 when he was stopped on U.S. Highway 78 for a traffic infraction. Karah Hagins, 22, an unemployed woman who had addresses of Willow Street, Athens, and Carrollton, was arrested on a charge of giving false information. Warrants and a lookout have been issued for the suspect, Stephen Carl Metz, 26, of Maysville.

Robin Hood on da loose:

Complaint: On May 3, a resident of Daniells Bridge Road reported someone had been shooting arrows in the vacant lot next to his home. He said he was concerned someone might get hurt. Deputies said they would patrol the area more frequently and be on the lookout for the shooters.

The rest is here.

Ken tells me part 3 of the Kolbert article is finally up on the New Yorker site. Go freak yourself the hell out.

I'm going to go ahead and link to the post on LD's blog where there's been a lot of discussion (okay, fighting) in the comments about how much context should be considered when recommending something to someone. LD and Zig maintain that it's extremely important to couch your recommendation in familiar terms and not to reach too far. I'm on the other side, maintaining that I don't consider myself able to judge what someone will and will not like (I could, but I don't think it's fair because it places limits on what I think they're capable of and that's not very democratic of me). With family members who have, say, more conservative morals than I do, I might hold back a little, but this more in the interest of family harmony than anything else. Here's the thing: I might call you a retard if you fail to appreciate what I am bestowing upon you, but I will also forget this quickly and (mostly) not hold it against you. I recommend a lot of things. If you want to pay attention to me, you can do so or not. The point is: it's your choice much more than it is mine.

1) Perdue signs "donor anonymity" bill, spouts bullshit about who it applies to. Also no more fingerprints on driver's licenses, so your chances of voting with a counterfeit one are raised; here's to everything evening out. And film tax breaks in Georgia went through.

2) He also signed the smoking ban, while outlining his arguments against it and swearing polls showing Georgians were in favor of it didn't affect his choice.

"I have some real concerns with it, because I wonder about the effect it will have on businesses that serve alcohol, but also serve food," said Commissioner Elton Dodson.

"I think we need to make sure the playing field is evened out," Dodson said.

Complete smoking bans, he said, have been shown to boost business, but partial bans could have a disparate effect.

This whole "whatever I want to happen is awesome for business and everything else is bad for it" attitude is really working my nerves. ABH getting in on the act too.

There is, of course, the argument that the private sector ought to control the issue of where smoking is, or is not, allowed. That argument holds that business owners will make decisions in their own best interests, and that if it makes sense to ban smoking in their establishments, business owners will do so. That is a compelling argument, but it would become moot with a total ban. If smoking is banned in all businesses, then no one business will have an advantage over another in terms of attracting customers.

You mean, "if nobody has any rights, the argument over whether people should have rights is moot"?

3) "The Kennon's home hasn't always been a repository for defaced and deformed food."

4) Shouldn't this new information affect their stormwater bill?

5) News I don't like = editorial.

6) Tee-hee. Outhouses.

[bugmenot ABH]

I'm just gonna go ahead and snag it. Though these things are top fives, consider them not ranked but jumbled together.

A. Top Five Lyrics that Move Your Heart:

1. Billy Bragg, "The Saturday Boy"

But I never made the first team,
I just made the first team laugh
And she never came to the phone
She was always in the bath
In the end, it took me a dictionary
To find out the meaning of unrequited
While she was giving herself for free
At a party to which I was never invited

Oh, Christ. I don't think I can do this part. They all look awful written out. And it's so much more the combination of the words with the sound than anything else. Let's pretend it doesn't exist except for those of you who can deal with it.

B. Top 5 Instrumentals:

1. "Rumble," Link Wray
2. "Classical Gas," Mason Williams
3. "Take Five," Dave Brubeck
4. "King Kong," Frank Zappa
5. "Jessica," The Allman Brothers

C. Top 5 Live Musical Experiences:

1. The Residents on their Demons Dance Alone tour at the Variety Playhouse in Atlanta; quite possibly the only time they've been through that city in my lifetime; yes, it was a sitdown show, but it was theatrical and moving, with some extra lyrics not on the album thrown in at the very end.

2. The White Stripes, in Athens at the 40 Watt, before they blew the fuck up; it was a short show and there was no encore (Jack gets pissy when people don't dance), but you never thought two people could make a noise like that; my ears rang for days; my body was exhausted just from standing there; it will never happen again, but at least it did.

3. Of Montreal, earlier this month in Athens; yeah, I see you smirking over there; wipe that shit off your face; it was a great show; Kevin Barnes is a rock star; I had practically nothing to drink, but felt as though I had; encapsulated pretty much everything I love about living here.

4. Elvis Costello, 1996, at Chastain; so the Crash Test Dummies opened and Chastain sucks and someone stole our t-shirts, but all that pales in comparison with the way everyone got the hell out of their seats and up to the stage, a real rarity for the venue; about two seconds of talking in between and an hour of tearing through the songs; old dude still has it.

5. Pylon, last summer, at Little Kings; did I mention I love Athens? I love the crap out of Athens. There are no doubt huge shows I am missing here. I will rely on y'all to remind me.

D. Top Five Artists You Think More People Should Listen To:

1. The Beatles (I know you bitches aren't listening nearly enough)
2. Love Tractor
3. NRBQ
4. Lil' Flip Scoldjah
5. Jon Anderson

E. Top Five Albums You Must Hear From Start to Finish:

1. Abbey Road
2. Tommy
3. Red-Headed Stranger
4. Brother Is to Son (Brother Danielson)
5. Transformer

F. Top Five Musical Heroes:

1. Pete motherfuckin' Townshend
2. Woody Guthrie
3. Harry Nilsson
4. Poly Styrene
5. George Martin

Go to, go-to kids.

Update: Gardner listens.

Arby's is doing a fine job in general with its ads for its new Reuben and turkey Reuben, which have a game show theme with a dude answering questions only with ingredients that are in the sandwich (thinking Arby's, a la their current campaign). But here is the weirdness: he fails to mention sauerkraut. He covers corned beef, Swiss, Thousand Island dressing, and turkey, but not what I think of as the ingredient that really makes a Reuben what it is. Nor does the summarizing voiceover at the end of the end mention it. Do people hate sauerkraut? Is it the least appealing aspect of this sandwich and, therefore, Arby's corporate has decided to deemphasize it?

Mr. Bauer, I know you can totally start a war with a billion Chinese. Just think of what it would mean for next season: you and Chloe, she scantily clad for once, throwing a grappling hook over the Great Wall; President Palmer of course reinstated to his rightful position; Lady Palmer, brought back from the dead by ancient Chinese secrets, staggering around as a zombie; Edgar, tricked out commando stizz with a headband, gesturing to the troops with one hand as he checks schematics on his palm pilot with the other. Besides, with the east coast obliterated, it's time to take it to a new front. We don't know the difference between a hallway in L.A. and a hallway in Beijing anyway.

A drought of over a month, but the panties are showing up again.

17) When he is not munching on pain pills, doing a line or two of coke or popping Vicodins, Sugh tends to be draining handfuls of 16-year-old Lagavulin, gunning shots of cheap tequila shooters, sucking down six-packs of Pabst Blue Ribbon or grabbing small beer coolers. This prodigious intake hardly blurs Sugh's keen eye for the telling character trait: ''I'll give him this: he didn't faint when I jerked the pen out of his forearm, poured vodka into the wound, stuffed cotton balls into the hole, then, for the final touch, tied it down with a pair of Lorna's thong panties.'' [from Ron Powers's review of James Crumley's latest book, The Right Madness, 05/08/05; gore galore just in the review]

18) OH youth! Oh beauty! Oh age of Botox, carb-cutting and dermabrasion! Now that it's impossible to divine a woman-of-a-certain-age's age for certain; when, for the first time in history, girls and their mothers flaunt the same hair colors, the same hemlines, the same kitten heels, there lingers one last divide between generations, one way to distinguish among females, between youth and youthful - you've guessed it. It's the size of her panties. [It's a whole damn article about the things, or an op-ed really, by Helen Klein Ross, called "String Theory," 05/08/05; a goldmine for panties and one that really makes up for the recent dearth]

[previously] [bugmenot NYT]

After actually watching both Family Guy and American Dad last night, I can say that yes, it is lovely that the outcry of fans can bring one show back and lead to the creation of another by the same folks. Would that it were true of Firefly or something comparably quality. But McFarlane's stuff is only occasionally funny (and much more so with the older show). I can see that he writes himself out of most criticisms, but here's the case with such: when it comes down to it, you still have to be funny. It predicts and parries the boring criticism that cartoon sitcoms have a bunch of jokes about farting by acknowledging this before including a bunch of jokes about farting. Fine. Well done. You're now where The Simpsons were ten years ago. The difference is that that show 1) has spiralled into much more complicated meta-humor riffs, and 2) manages to make them more than mere observations. Just pointing something out can be funny, but it is less so that bothering to write a real joke.

1) System of a Down, "B.Y.O.B." -- Covered and rated.

2) Doves, "Snowden" -- There must be something more than this. Padded with a little-bitty Who rip-off that is also not enough to be interesting because it is overshadowed by the sweeping U2-ness. 3. [video here]

3) KT Tunstall, "Other Side of the World" -- Too ballady and sentimental. Sounds like a million things you've heard before, and also is just simply meh. Not quite Paula Cole, but in that area. 2. [video at her site, under "album"]

4) Juliette & the Licks, "You're Speaking My Language" -- Mid to upper range of actor music and at least as likeable as lots of other folks doing this garage rock thing. If there's not much there there, it doesn't really seem to be her fault. 4. (video at NME in real)

5) Gorillaz, "Feel Good Inc." -- Covered and rated.

6) Praise Cats feat. Andrea Love, "Shined on Me" -- Sample will probably do ya. It's this week's not hatable but not exciting dance entry. 3. (sample here)

7) The Coral, "In the Morning" -- A little twinkly, but not really folk despite that word showing up a lot. Video resurrects awfulness of 1980s stuff that appears to be hand-colored very badly. That should be stopped. 3. (NME has link to video if you register)

8) Lemon Jelly, "Make Things Right" -- For this kind of layered, looped slightly trancey thing, it is fine enough and the appearance of colored things in the video makes it a little hypnotic. Ultimately not chorusy or structured enough. 3. (video here; real only)

9) Hall & Oates, "I'll Be Around" -- What in the hell, England? Not that this isn't tapping my feet, and listen to that clear guitar sound we used to think of as twee indie. Is it primo H&O? It is acceptable. It's so nice to hear something with a melody this week, but 4:02 is a little long. 4. (thank you, AOL Music)

10) Kelly Osbourne, "One Word" -- This goes in the "would like to like but don't really" pile. Too classy, if anything, and much too laid back. Sure, the video looks great, but come on, Kelly, have some fun. 2. (video here)

11) The Game feat. 50 Cent, "Hate It or Love It" -- Hype can be ignored. I don't know if he's rap's MVP or not, but the song is good, the flow appropriately paced (sometimes it slips a bit), the track behind the vocals proof of who can get the fucking job done. Even 50 doesn't make me hate it. If he'd just guest like this, I'd have no problem with him at all. Did I cover this already? If I did it's not showing up in my searches. 6. (video is here)

12) Cliff Richard, "What Car?" -- No luck.

13) The Futureheads, "Decent Days and Nights" -- Only now this is the single? Quotes "My Sharona" with the guitars, but quickly kicks off and moves into multiple vocals. Not as full of harmonies as some of their stuff, but the "carried away" bit is esp nice. Yes, they are boys with guitars, but this is not always bad. It can be cute and singable, and this is. 8. (video here)

1) Heh. Karma is a bitch, huh? Giese, appointed in place of "ineffective" Simpson, declares definition-of-family ordinance unconstitutional (in one area). Ha! Heidi says she has no problem with it, but ABH editorial calls her words "artful" and says the reactions of commissioners and mayor are eroding trust in court system. Winders thinks maybe this will encourage ACC to craft better ordinances.

2) Fewer ACC high school students are enrolling at UGA after graduation. One reason that's not brought up in the article (quite possibly because of constant letters to the editor complaining about negative coverage of local schools) is that UGA has become progressively more difficult to get into, while Clarke Central and Cedar Shoals are not highly ranked these days among Georgia high schools.

3) Perdue signs Honesty in Government Act, says "The people of Georgia deserve to know that the business of state government will always be conducted in the highest ethical standards" (they just won't be allowed to know what a lot of that business is).

4) ABH approves of the very gradual approach to NPUs.

Instead of taking the plunge into a full-fledged NPU program, commissioners opted for something called a Neighborhood Notification Initiative, with the county planning department using the Internet to notify residents of given neighborhoods about proposed development or zoning actions in or near their communities slated for review by the county planning commission and other government bodies.

This is indeed a step, but Internet notification has a flaw; namely, not everyone has the Internet, especially those in poorer neighborhoods who are less organized about this kind of thing to begin with.

5) Letter writer suggests registration for cyclists to collect accurate data. Jim explains further what his two weeks of cycling to work werelike and where he stands on funding for bike lanes.

6) Stormwater fee proceeds will lead to property tax cuts; plenty of money for firefighters and cops and extra raises (above the standard 3%) for high performing employees, but not for buses on nights and weekends. Again. Clarke County school district wants slight millage hike to pay for, you know, school.

7) UGA needs more steam capacity.

8) Yarbrough cranks out cliched "Southerners talk awesome" column.

9) Doug Haines maybe not quite so out of the ordinary. Speed humps merely encourage people to speed up in between humps, as I can confirm from my daily walk.

10) OMG! Evil hipsters are corrupting our children who are of age? Mention of possible revisiting of smoking ban in ACC has this gem:

Commissioner Elton Dodson spoke about an R.J. Reynolds stealth marketing campaign that sends smoking "hipsters" into bars and restaurants, which he said influences unknowing young people.

Carabello has ABH column re: state smoking ban, which will become law tomorrow if not vetoed. She likes it, makes the old smokers are a drag on our tax dollars argument. Perdue will hold press conference today on it, at National Museum of Patriotism, where he will either sign or veto it.

11) Shipp says Perdue hates Meredith.

12) Another person making the point that Adams sucks and the Foundation knows it.

[bugmenot ABH]

Since The New Yorker didn't see fit to put part III of Kolbert's climate change/global warming article online, even though they had done so with the first two parts, here is some of the conclusion:

As the effects of global warming become more and more apparent, will we react by finally fashioning a global response? Or will we retreat into ever narrower and more destructive forms of self-interest? It may seem impossible to imagine that a technologically advanced society could choose, in essence, to destroy itself, but that is what we are now in the process of doing.

Bam. Period. End of three-part article.

I will be out o' office, due to:

1) final exam in the middle of the day

2) need to get shit together for obligatory Mom's Day trip to the ATL

If you are damn lucky, I will manage to hit the library and type you something nice. Then again, that may not happen, as my right hand will no doubt be crippled from writing pages and pages (while trying to keep my handwriting legible) on James and Cather.

Wook at the widdle elfin princey.

You will also get this marvelous sentence:

Having shed the twenty pounds of muscle he put on for his role as a crusader in Kingdom of Heaven, Bloom is lean and toned, cutting through the water like a dolphin in green board shorts.

OMG! Shorts are so over this summer. All the cool dolphins are wearing flowing skirts.

There is an ad in my New Yorker for The Jane Austen Book Club, the cover of which you can enlarge at the Amazon link. At any rate, there is a quote on the cover that reads as follows:

"If I could eat this novel, I would." -- Alice Sebold

My question is: Who's stoppin' ya, sister? Is this book made out of poison? Last time I checked, paper products were eminently digestible, if not exactly nutritious. I would hold her to her word if I had the power.

1) Whoopadeedoo. Arch Foundation will be accepting donations soon.

But Arch Foundation trustees may be expected to donate more than their UGA Foundation predecessors.

"One of the things the university has done recently and is trying to do going forward is to place more an emphasis on an expectation of philanthropy among its volunteers," Wrigley said. "In the past, we probably haven't placed as much of an expectation on donations."

Hey rich people. Chop chop. Start lining up and opening those checkbooks. We need more giant planters on campus. Also: Mother. Fucking. Fuck. Would you get it through your incredibly thick skull that Dooley is not the only issue here? Way to buy everything Adams is selling.

If there is anything good to come from the difficult relationship between the UGA Foundation and Adams, it is the clear indication that oversight of foundation-managed funds is critical. That lesson comes from the UGA Foundation's ham-fisted attempt to generate enough negative feeling about Adams to force his ouster by ordering an audit of his expenditures.

...The issue of fiscal responsibility with donor dollars will be particularly critical in connection with the Arch Foundation, which is being put together by the university and will presumably comprise members supportive of Adams and the current UGA administration. That support should not be allowed to drift into rubber-stamping of Adams' use of donor funds.

Well, you know, if it doesn't drift that way they can always disband it, right? AJC is a little more nuanced, explaining that, if the Foundation is cooperative, it's not out of the question that we could have two, but they also call for a laying down of arms.

2) Commission votes to hire a planner to implement NPUs. Verrrry slooowly. Fee hikes pass, with Jordan the only vote against water increase and unanimity on trash. Also, bike lanes and sidewalks to be added way the fuck out on Mitchell Bridge Road.

3) This headline highlights the minor changes Perdue signed into law. The ones that are more important than sparklers are buried. e.g.,

Perdue also signed measures further restricting the information which journalists and private citizens can obtain under the Open Records Act

4) The second boy makes a good point...

5) Dude, the time to call attention to a "not to be missed" show is not after most people have missed 70 percent of it.

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

Sure, the explanation of the 86 pan seems to drag on for five minutes, but Cooking Under Fire is mostly continuing to be pretty brutal. If you cannot cut the fucking mustard, such as finishing your dish within the hour (+10 minutes) time limit, your ass is getting that pan. Apparently, the bit of America that watches the show thinks Blair King or Autumn Maddox should win. Neither is untalented, but his last dish was a bit of a mess, and she's a little by the book. I am still going with Katsuji, who not only plates by far the best, but is creative, contemporary, and has the giant ego necessary. He fucks up sometimes, but he's not afraid to fuck up, and he knows exactly what he wants to do. These are important skills to have.

“Saget is the dirtiest motherfucking cocksucker that ever walked the face of the earth!” said Mr. Jillette. “Doing those little bullshit family shows, playing the retarded fucking squeaky dickless dad—that’s not Saget! That’s a joke. You go to a restaurant with Saget and before he orders food, he’ll be talking to the waitress about fucking his daughters in the ass.”

The title for NBC's next reality show is greatness. The actual subject considerably less exciting. We were picturing more of a cross between Nanny 911 and The Contender.

There is more new Sufjan stuff at Stereogum. I'd wager Illinois will top Michigan based on what I've heard so far, but it's possible that is just the appeal of the shiny and the new. Certainly better than Seven Swans, which I didn't like as much as most people (even if I did buy it for my dad). Don't see a date yet, but I'm buying this motherfucker.

1) UGA forms new Arch Foundation, with board including loads of university representatives (like SGA president). Only one member so far overlaps (Adams).

It was no accident that the announcement came the same day the 68-year-old UGA Foundation met to decide what its future would be. Jackson said university officials thought the timing of releasing information about the new foundation "would be helpful to the old foundation" as UGA Foundation trustees discussed their future in an Atlanta meeting, during which the foundation's two top officers announced their resignations.

UGA Foundation not disbanding yet, but will lose their UGA space and one employee July 19.

Barber told trustees Tuesday to carefully consider Cooper's suggestion of some sort of merger between the UGA Foundation and the Arch Foundation.

"When two people are contemplating divorce, they need to love the child more than they hate each other," he said. "In this case, the child is the university."

AJC certainly puts all this differently, referring to Adams's "hand-picked slate of boosters" (Arch Foundation). Shipp has some semi-facetious suggestions for how to work it all out, but dude, "superego" doesn't mean "big ego."

2) Marilou has new job, which seems to have been created expressly for her.

3) Commission not giving County Auditor Wolfe the money to hire two new erosion enforcers. Sounds like it's a budget thing to some extent. States thinks reorganization is needed, and Carter is the only one to vote in favor of it.

4) Perdue babbles about balance, signs redistricting into law.

5) ABH on courthouse security: thinks we should definitely know who's in charge and that there should be graduated (according to whether it's a rural county and so forth) state-set standards. I understand the point, but the way people are hammering on this issue, you'd think folks were getting shot in courthouses on a daily basis.

6) Pete gives Jim credit for trying the bike thing.

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

What is more phallocentric: the actual track "Girlfight" or writing a review of it in which you mention the two "featuring"s, who happen to be dudes, way way more than the main artist, who wrote the song.

Lil' Jon = 5 mentions
Big Boi = 1 mention

Totaling = 6 mentions

B. Valentine? 2 mentions.

That is the sound of me punching myself in the brain to get this image out of my head. Damn you, functional short-term memory! That out of the way, whose horribly misshapen and huge hand is that? It looks almost achondroplasic.

AP: In your career, what are you most afraid of happening?

Hilton: I don't know. Nothing.

AP: Nothing? What about in your personal life?

Hilton: I don't know. Death.

AP: Why? What's so scary about death?

Hilton: Because I don't know what happens.

AP: Neither do I, Paris.

This is the deep part. The part about bikinis and whether or not Hawaii is a state can be found here.

Please read Adrian's letter in the Flagpole re: UGA's pathetic excuse for pedestrian safety, which consists more of planting flowers and making life more difficult for everyone. Adrian, could you send a copy of this to Adams? You are so right on all of this.

It's really the whole picture:

Theft: On April 26, Deputy David Gilstrap was dispatched to a home in Circle C Mobile Home Park off Monroe Highway, where a woman explained a man she knew only as Milton had stayed at her home. When she awoke about 6 a.m., the man was gone and so was her purse. She found the purse in the yard, but the wallet containing $8 cash, a food stamp card and a forklift license was gone. She said the man was wearing camouflage pants, boots, had short hair and was in his early 40s.

This dude says what he means and means what he says:

Assault: On April 26, Deputy Brad Williams was dispatched to an assault at a house in northern Oconee County. The woman explained her husband and son were arguing and the husband said he was going to kick some rear end. She said she bent over in front of him and he kicked her in the buttocks. When Williams arrived, the husband had left the home. The wife made a complaint, but the son told Williams he didn't think his father had kicked her hard. Williams checked the woman, but couldn't find any physical marks from the alleged assault.

All the rest here.

Dude! Nobody told me the Facebook is the best thing ever on campus right now. I mean, I heard the kids talking, but I didn't listen enough. I should always, always listen to the kids. But so the spotting of Blue modifying his profile led me to investigate. I can tell you that it is interesting stuff and that Gordon Ely-Kelso is not only a kickass punter but majors in art, loves LOTR and Interpreter of Maladies, and likes the folk music. Rock.

Matthew likey. Why you no likey?

1) Foundation vote on disbanding is today. It's expected to be close.

"If the new board is a self-appointed board by the president, there will be no checks and balances," said trustee Nelson Bowers. "There won't be anybody with any kind of objective opinion."

Trustees seem to be doing a slightly better job of getting it out there that this is not (or at least not exclusively) a Dooley thing, pointing out that "their concerns with Adams began earlier and centered on his spending. An October 2003 audit, commissioned by the foundation, accused Adams of misspending donors' money." Adams has said that other people will help select trustees of a new Foundation. Macon Telegraph sides with the Regents, but not very enthusiastically. Columbus is apparently playing a large part in this, being the home of Leebern, Wooten, Amos, Morton, and Blanchard. Whew.

2) Trash pickup inside city limits? Also probably getting hiked.

3) Wait! Kemp totally says something else sensible, mentioning that new courtroom regulations might not be fair unless money is provided to implement them.

4) Ralph Reed says he's grassroots. Cagle says he's more grassroots. Both of them appear to have plenty of money.

5) So apparently the ABH is on board with prosecuting Jennifer Willbanks. I see the reasons, but I'm just not sure it's right. This paragraph in particular bugs me:

Lasseter should be applauded for her effort to make an example out of Wilbanks. Holding Wilbanks responsible for her actions could cause someone else to think twice before contemplating a similar headline-grabbing stunt.

Was that the intent? Publicity? Is that why she had a towel over her head coming back?

6) Matt Karzen responds to editorial bashing Mauldin by explaining that prosecutors unfortunately work in the real world, where things are often messy, and don't get to cherry-pick cases.

7) Loran Smith consults the Internets.

8) French-fry powered car? Almost.

9) Lumpkin Street repaving will be done by fall semester. But Tate Part Deux won't be started yet. Some kind of planning is needed. Also, it has a webpage, from which we learn that it will have restrooms. No more peeing out the windows, kids!

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

Oh Shit I saw:

Does Greg Blue count? Granted, he's a Dawg and it would
make sense to see him on campus. But at the same time, he was wearing Thomas Davis's NFL tags on his bookbag. Is Blue a sure thing for the NFL? I have no idea. The legitimacy of this post may depend on that factor. Actually, I guess that I really can't count this until he officially gets drafted. Oh well.

What was he doing at Club SLC last night? Hittin' the books for finals? No, not exactly. Just updating his profile on thefacebook.com. Course, if I were as attractive as him and played safety at Georgia, I'd probably be more concerned with my facebook profile than with studying, too.

And special bonus Oh Shit Someone I Know Saw:

My ex-girlfriend Brandy who lives in Manhattan last weekend hung out at a party with New Kid Joey McIntyre (sp?). This guy she is dating is apparently friends with him. And then also she's volunteering at the Tribeca Film Festival, and last week Griffin Dunn told her he'd "really like it if she came to his premiere."

So I may be a bit late in noticing this story exists, but not as late as they are in printing it. You mean there is cheese beyond Kraft singles? Next thing you know you'll be telling us we can eat those poisonous tomato things. [bugmenot NYT]

It's just somewhere in that range, and that's going to have to be good enough.

Oh shit I didn't see but am really loosely connected to:

Apparently my father-in-law knows the runaway bride's daddy (works with him, I believe). He also apparently got to meet Greta Van Susteren. More details if I find 'em out this weekend.

That's what 24 is doing, but in a good way. At this point, I would honestly not be all that surprised if they did go ahead and nuke the east coast. The strength of the show has been (not always, but at its best) its ruthlessness. After wussing out and not actually killing the president earlier this season, the least they could do is let something big blow up, and while the explosion of Jack and Audrey's relationship was definitely something, we will not be satisfied with that alone, even if it did also ol' Velvet Tones to do some fab devastated acting. When Jack swings from despair and compassion to wanting to punch everyone around him to shutting down emotionally in order to put his career and life on the line? That is what we love. More, please.

Part Two of Kolbert's global warming story is up, this one having more to do with the impact of drought on civilization. Long story short? It's not small.

Rather than lessening, my esteem (word choice so wrong there) for Backstreet is in fact growing with further listens to "Incomplete." The video is only helping, with its thorough ridiculousness. Look! They're coming together! And being buffeted about by different elements, like wind and fire and water! And that one dude is playing a piano in the fucking snow. You know how God supposedly tests your faith sometimes? The one who is in charge of pop music appreciation is sooo doing that. Mezzy boys, I am curious what you think of it, as its over-the-top quality may actually make you like it. I swear I won't tell anyone. [Video can be watched on AOL Music or at MTV and probably elsewhere]

People getting really pissed off in three, two, one... i.e., Manderlay trailer is up and is designed to make you uncomfortable. I don't think he'll win at Cannes. Some people will be annoyed, and others will express their jadedness at his antics. And I'll probably wait half a year at least to see it. Still. It'll be on my brain from time to time.

People who get thrown out of the game for complaining shouldn't be bitching about other people complaining too much. Is it that Cox is such a genius that he makes the umpires love him with constant complaints about their strike zone? In which case, poor little Tony LaRussa can't fucking compete? This is the kind of crap that screws the Braves repeatedly in the playoffs, when umpires over-compensate so as not to be seen as biased. Is LaRussa just setting it up this early in the season? And, if so, is it a kind of compliment? Or is he just a douche?

1) ABH finally mentions Foundation's problem with Adams and expresses that it's not about athletics v. academics; sure, it is for a few, but not most. Number who have withdrawn or pledged to withdraw support up to eight, but apparently the university doesn't care about their money. The article makes it clear that they really don't make up a huge portion of gifts, but when you're getting dick from the state, dollars do count. Lynda Courts, Foundation chair, is a hard-ass. I'd bet she has a job waiting.

2) Haines plea-bargains out, depriving us of the fun of a trial. And the judge throws out all but one of Braswell's challenges (that last being the possibility of getting her job back, which is damn unlikely).

3) Lee Shearer does a great job talking about the way the state has raided hazardous waste (and similar) funds, passing down costs to local governments.

4) People are bitching about the sample stormwater bills, less because of the cost portrayed on them and more because of the cost of mailing all of them out. (Also, Brad Aaron is new BikeAthens administrator. Look the hell out.)

5) Neighborhood planning units on the agenda. Also, bad-ass picture of States, and Tom Reynolds just blurts stuff out.

6) Also interesting: growing number of cases require Spanish-English interpreters. Seems as though ACC is at least making a good effort in this direction.

7) Jim sums up his bike commuting experiment, which changed his mind in some ways and didn't in others.

8) ABH trashes Mauldin, but if anything, neither of these cases should really have come to trial. I'm not sure there's much you can do if you can't find a reliable eyewitness or any physical evidence linking the accused to the crime. Am curious if the suggestion is that he shouldn't have brought cases at all?

9) UGA student writes about how the music the kids listen to sucks, but doesn't bother to check his spelling.

10) Sara Baker is surprised at the lack of coverage of the anti-nuclear-option protest downtown. Because Washington was so paying attention. Reinforcement.

11) Aw... You can't spin this to say Adams hates service workers? Seriously, though. Both points are valid.

12) Fuckers! I cannot believe they are trying to pull this again. Admittedly, the two commissioners spoken to are nutjobs for the smoking ban, but still. Oy.
13) UGA still slinging students' SS numbers all over the place.

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

So it has and can be done. Team Brown set a personal record by indeed hitting five shows in a month (none of which started before 10 p.m.), far more than we ever ever made it to when yet young and strong and in school. I can't promise this will happen again while months remain 31 days long at the most, but for two people with real deal, office-type jobs, I think we deserve a god damn medal.

1. Eminem, "Mockingbird" -- Truly thought I had covered this here, but either I imagined it or it's somewhere else. Anyway. Song transcends its terribleness to become actually quite awesome. Em can't sing, but as usual in this current pop-rap era, that's turned into a virtue. Song is creepy (he does that), and video even more so with its use of home movie footage. Among the people I would really not like to be in this world is Kim Mathers. It is all pretty psycho, but it's psycho that gets stuck in my head. 6. [streamable here]

2. Blaze feat. Barbara Tucker, "Most Precious Love" -- Tedious indeed. Thump thump. Sing sing. Makes me think of last week's Black Rock/Debra Andrew track, only now I'm appreciating that one anew. Still have to end up with a 2 though, as it's not incompetent. [minute-long sample should do you]

3. Lucie Silvas, "The Game Is Won" -- Bleh. Oversung. Tom Ewing compares to "Beautiful," but that song is leagues better. This could have a nice little Elton John quality to it (listen to the way it sounds at the beginning), but it's taken in the wrong direction. Ends up being most things I don't like about ballads. 2. [video linked to here]

4. Akon, "Lonely" -- Covered, but not rated. Still filled with love for this song to the extent of buying the album. I may have to give it a 9, and it's certainly among my top few for the year so far. Dude. He misses his girl. [Note: only one excerpted reviewer goes for the middle ground, with a 5; everyone else opts for a 0 or a 9; now that's what I call music]

5. Willy Mason, "So Long" -- He really can't sing, and the song is incredibly simple and not interesting, and yet he's amiable enough to pull something off. Would probably prefer it minus the harmonica. As is, I can feel okay about giving it a 4, though it goes nowhere and half steals from the "Battle Hymn of the Republic." [video here]

6. Weezer, "Beverly Hills" -- Covered and rated.

7. Faith Evans, "Again" -- Sort of a mess, but I do like the beat that would sound great coming out of some massive car speakers (much as I may disapprove of such in reality). I don't know why whoever produced this decided to combine mid-90s "soul" wailing with the strong drumbeat, but it's at least interesting, even if it doesn't really end up working. 4. [video on her flash-heavy site]

8. Lil' Jon feat. Usher and Ludacris, "Lovers & Friends" -- Another I am shocked (but then not) that I haven't covered. This because it may be too ridiculous. I do encourage you to go listen if you haven't, but I don't think a song that has me practically in tears by the time Lil' Jon's verse rolls around is really possible to rate. I do like thinking that these three fellas are the lovers and friends of the title, but it doesn't work like that. [listen here]

9. Raghav, "No I" -- Augh. From the sample I've heard, I think I'd love this, but I can't find more than a bit here and there. Very Backstreet with bubbly sounds on the track, and I already like Raghav. Not as Indian as some of his other stuff, but sigh. Not rated. [teeny sample here]

10. The Killers, "Smile Like You Mean It" -- Am I allowed to penalize them for annoying me by selling out the 40 Watt and filling it with children who did not appreciate the Trachtenburgs? I am probably not. I think this is okay. Not that I'm crazy about their previous singles, but they're a little hookier. The guitar noise is good. I just don't care. 4. [video here]

11. Maximo Park, "Graffiti" -- Too many damn songs this time around. Hey, that sounds a little like Steve Nieve on the keyboards, when they come forward, which is not often enough. It is certainly loud, and that is a positive thing, but the stop-and-start rhythm doesn't let it get going. More of this type of thing, in general, but cuter than the Killers song above, so it gets one more point. 5 and guessing it'll show up on Twin Powers' iPod. [streaming on their site]

12. The Dears, "22: The Death of All the Romance" -- Look, you sensitive bastards, the longer it takes me to find your track, the more annoyed with you I will no doubt be. And I am hearing "six minutes"? Six minutes? Maybe I don't care enough. This bitching promptly caused it to show up, and it's okay. I am beginning to get bored at about 2:40, but the voices are pretty, and there is a tone to it that reminds me of The Residents. I am not filled with hate, but I am a little with boredom. 4. [real only]

13. Hood, "The Negatives" -- Read above. Pretty, but not pretty enough to make up for excessive slowness. 3, because it's less interesting than the Dears track. [listen here]

14. The House of Love, "Gotta Be That Way" -- Acoustic dance? Kinda. Can only listen to a minute and am frigging tired of this. Song is not bad at all. 5? Hell if I know. [sample here]

15. Art Brut, "Emily Kane" -- Oh, fine. If you don't want me to hear your song, then I just won't. Not much good luck this time around. Not rated. Whew.

 Franceness. All these to say, in short: there was Frilight. There was Delirium. There was even a little Criterium. There was much fun, and (although no action shots exist of this) I even got my paper done. More exciting pictures at Athens World once I get 'em up.

King Shit. 

R.U.M.P.