Antidisingenuousmentarianism

Just telling y'all again. In case you didn't catch it earlier. Things are going to be nonexistent for a while until I get my act together webbernets-to-home-wise. There is much else to do online. Take joy in the sidebar of links.

Yes, you could headline this article the way it's headlined: "Redistricting plan might get veto from governor," but you could also look a little deeper and realize that what Sonny's actually saying is that, even if the redistricting plan does violate the standards established last session, he might let it go through. i.e., The news story here is not that there's a smidge of a chance he might veto it. The news story is that despite his saying "I feel very strongly about those principles," his desire to be responsible for nothing is stronger.

ABH wants Congress to talk about the tax code. Sure, it could be simpler. I know I take advantage of the free tax prep here in Athens. But if it's a choice between fucking up the entire system with a sales tax or a flat tax and dealing with a bit of complexity, I'll exercise my damn brain.

I can't be the only one starting to think John Oxendine is a bit of a wackjob. One fire in one chemistry lab in one high school isn't necessarily to be taken lightly, but still...

"There are two things that make up the backbone of our society: Our educational system and our legal system," Oxendine said. "When someone wants to strike out at our education system, it's a sign that this person may be mentally unstable and is too dangerous to have out walking around on the street. This is serious and we are not looking at it as a prank. "

You can raise taxes some places and sometimes without rioting resulting.

R&B says Adams is requesting state funding for the university today (from the higher education appropriations subcommittee, headed by your pal and mine, Bob Smith). Includes handy graph.

R&B talks about why that top 10% of your class admissions proposal has sucked hard in Texas.

USG newsletter summarizes some bills of interest.

Taylor's going hard on HOPE. (And R&B has an op-ed on why the lottery should be abolished.)

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

I'll be in my trailer.

Really, I'm not sure how much insight I provided on the matter, other than that small amount that comes from being an employee of the system and the part of my brain that says "mandatory = generally a bad idea." After, they're what gave us mandatory minimum sentencing, unfunded mandates, and the like. They're what's behind the 65% solution making its way through the dome. Sure, some things are necessary (e.g., not letting folks go around conking each other on the head in order to obtain more cash), and it would be nice to have a little more diversity at this school at least in the field of accent, but the state government has more than enough control over the University System already, and less flexibility is, well, unwelcome.

All I'm sayin' is that I don't see anyone threatening to cut the White House Chief of Staff's eye out on Lost. Hotttness.

[Sidebar: Ahhh... David Fury. Natch.]

Luis Fernando Verissimo, that is. Author of The Club of Angels, which a friend just lent me and which I'm already about halfway through after an a.m. on the bus (it's a short book). You'd think, from the extended opening of the book in which the narrator discusses the nature of truth and the responsibilities of the author, that it's a pseudonym, but I haven't found anything to that effect. What it is mostly about is gluttony and punishment, as the amazon page will tell you. Here's a little bit from p. 38, which is a quote from the deceased Ramos:

"...and we will say: 'It was our best moment.' We will compare it with other moments in our lives and we will say that no moment was ever again quite like this one. We will sate our appetites again, of course, because that is the blessed nature of appetite. It isn't every day that we want to see a syrupy Van Gogh or hear a piquant fuge by Bach, or make love to a succulent woman, but every day we want to eat; hunger is the recurring desire, the only recurring desire, for sight, sound, sex, and power all come to an end, but hunger goes on, and while one might weary of Ravel for ever, one could only ever weary of ravioli for, at most, a day."

5) This method, fire officials said, served Ms. Johnson relatively well. Twice last April, they said, she set fires in large stores in Harlem — an H & M and an Old Navy — and made off with bags of clothing. At the H & M store on West 125th Street, fire officials said, she was caught on a security videotape stuffing bras and panties into a duffel bag, firing up a lighter, and heading for the exit two minutes later as large flames flickered from the lingerie section.

On Wednesday, fire officials said, Ms. Johnson returned to the same H & M, filled a bag with bras and panties, and tried to walk out without setting fire to anything. She was caught. [from "A Fire Unset Led to a Thief's Arrest, Officials Say," by Andy Newman, 01/28/06]

Note: Panty-watch is a regular feature here dedicated to tracking appearances of the word "panties" or "panty" in the New York Times, partially because it's amusing to see the Gray Lady venturing into such areas and partially to see if it correlates with anything specific. The end of the year should result in a few more graphs.

[previously] [bugmenot NYT]

Apparently, we Athenians are cheap Republican bastards for not wanting to pay $15 on a Thursday to see Bob Pollard. Funny how that goes.

Walter Jones, Morris's man in the dome, writes about the 65-percent solution. At first, it seemed like he was poking fun at Sonny when he wrote, "Spending more than 35 percent on such frills as lunch, bus fuel, and campus police officers - and especially administrators - would be forbidden." You know, it seemed like sarcasm. And perhaps it still is a little, but the rest of the column goes on to make the case that Sonny in fact totally rocks on education and that it's pretty much only fat cat administrators who are against this proposal (despite the fact that I don't remember a single teacher coming out in favor of it). Later, he says this:

Education funding has grown during the Perdue administration by more than $1 billion, but it has still fallen nearly $1 billion short of what would be required to fully fund the level prescribed by the Quality Basic Education Act that is based on the number of pupils. In government-speak, that represents a "cut."

Mr. Jones, just because the number of pupils has grown statewide does not mean the state owes any less to those pupils. His wrap-up, which concludes that this could result in mergers of smaller schools and greater difficulty for those in rural settings is appreciated, but yet again, we have people treating the school system like the business it is not.

Jason hearts Heidi. But does kinda overlook the redistricting plan Heard proposed, which would've achieved the supposed goal of the current one without splitting ACC. You know, the one that even discussion on was voted down in a hurry.

Remember when PE used to be part of school? ABH not so much.

Sonny Perdue responsible for nekkid dummies on the front page of the paper.

Yo, Poverty Task Force, y'all might want to read this.

State Dems have found another way to outflank Repubs, this time by pitting rural folk against the suburban kids who make up most of UGA. Essentially, "Under the Democratic bill, all high school students who graduate in the top 10 percent of their class would be guaranteed a spot at the state university of their choice." Which is, I guess, a good political move but not a real smart one in terms of actual education policy, especially when the university a lot of them are going to want to go to already isn't being compensated for increased numbers of students.

Georgia sucks balls on the death penalty.

Asked whether Gov. Sonny Perdue would consider a moratorium, his spokesman, Dan McLagan, said simply: "Nope."

[bugmenot ABH]

Sasha says the best thing anyone has said yet about James Frey, working it into a larger picture that is about our need to contextualize, which (of course) is sort of the very vague version of what wallace-l has heatedly debated lately. Other people would like to talk about politics wrt art. I am not generally interested. What I am interested in is the less mediated reactions, the gut punch.

Mr. Brown and I talked about this for a bit this weekend, and he told me about reading this little book on Keith Haring we have, and how there is a section in which the authors basically explicate this one painting, and how it's very interesting the things they bring out, and in some ways probably did make him appreciate the painting more. But (bigness) he also said that if the meaning were the same and the visuals both different and sucktastic, that he wouldn't like the painting. So for Team Brown, the aesthetic dimension is clearly the primary one.

1) That Uncertain Feeling: Minor Lubitsch, but Lubitsch nonetheless. His movies always feel like your standard rom coms, but when you think about them, it's clear that there's no faithfulness to a formula. Almost anything could happen at any time. And he manages to push production codes with ease. This one had one of my favorite fellas in it, too: the perennially self-amused Melvyn Douglas (who is, please note, Ileana Douglas's grandpappy, appropriately enough, since she often has a similar air of wryness and playing along for the sake of a joke).

2) Valley Girl: I'd seen the first 15 minutes or so back in high school but hadn't followed up on seeing the rest. As a Nic Cage (sidebar!!!) fan, this is a terrible oversight. Or was. Because now it's notched, and I see the charms of the thing. Sure, it's madly dated, to the point of the viewer having trouble distinguishing between the music the valley kids listen to and the "punk" of the rival group, but bad fashion aside, there is a sweetness that I don't think you find in Fast Times at Ridgemont High, otherwise a very similar movie. And Cage just burns up the screen whenever he's on it (he can still do this, but with the hairplugs and the veneers and so on, it's harder). What happens? Nothing happens. But there is a niceness to the nothing, most notably when Cage is kind of dancing down the path from Julie's house. (Here's what Eebs says.)

This week's jukebox is up.

It is nice to know others dislike the Gavin DeGraw comparably, but you will all (mostly) feel my wrath for disrespecting Chris Brown.

The Atreyu is far better than expected for being all, well, thrashy. Mike Barthel gets it right, only I went with a 5 rather than a 6. I gave the T-Pain a 7, as I believe I was feeling generous (and have a noted weakness for vocoders). Tokio Hotel and Tuung both scored a 4, Mogwai and Utada Kiraku got a 5. Paparizou, West End Girls, and Go Team all clocked a 6. Two of us prefer pajamas to Hi-Tack.

This is what I had said about Shuji & Akira, which I initially gave a 4: Here we go again. The beginning’s all Japanese mariachi musical, but when it does the same thing for minutes upon minutes, one does tend to get a little bored. Squealing trumpets are wonderful, and sometimes nothing happening is okay if the original thing is compelling enough to keep one around, but it’s not quite. A 4 might have been too grouchy, though.

If you want to hear any of it, email me by the end of Tuesday.

S/L: tudor

Content of message: Thanks to everyone that responded to my request to help me find a tutor!

This isn't so much irony as it is the reinforcement of a point.

That may be taking it a little far, but there are positive things to say about the Pussycat Dolls' new single, "Beep," which is full of 'em, both the sound effect itself and, in the video, the things it stands for. The moral of the story is?

1) "My Humps" may have been a trailblazer (?).
2) Will.I.Am likes ass.
3) So do we all.
4) Karate kicks make anything better.
5) Mixed messages are catchy.

AOL Music overstates the case a wee bit.

Chasteen's an ass. But then you knew that. Sometimes the desire for "leadership" can be overstated, falling too much under the "great man" theory of how politics goes. A need to project strength and independence is, after all, less important than genuine strength and independence, which doesn't need to assert itself for the sake of doing so. That said, like Kitty, we love balls. Which is why this paragraph is irritating:

It may, of course, turn out Chasteen took a correct position Wednesday, at least as far as his vote reflects an acceptance of the proposed redistricting. The plain truth is no one can say with certainty what might happen if - or, more likely, when - the proposed redistricting becomes a fact. On one hand, it's certainly possible splitting Athens-Clarke County between two Senate districts will have the happy result of doubling the number of advocates the community has in the upper chamber of the state legislature. On the other hand, it's also possible splitting the county and lumping it in with substantial portions of neighboring counties will dilute Athens-Clarke's voice in the legislature.

Even a hint in the direction of which is more expectable would be nice; just because there are two possibilities does not mean the chance of each happening is 50%. JMac has thoughts on how this affects the mayoral race. Impartial observer Steve Wiktorski thinks Chasteen is a courageous man. And Blake tells us that the Madison County Commission wasn't consulted either (luckily, some of them don't care). Even Cox is talking about it. And Lynn and Jordan were your two missing commissioners the other night, both of whom no doubt would oppose redistricting.

"We wanted to make sure it wouldn't be stupid." Um, yes. Fine aim there. And sort of helping the point along.

University Council would like to have all incoming freshman undergo mandatory drug and alcohol education. How much can it cost to print up fliers with the "liquor then beer" rhyme?

Damn it. Andy Herod might be president of the Green Acres neighborhood association and, as such, a thorn in the side of La Puerta del Sol, but he does do a nice job smacking the R&B upside the head for their misguided editorial on redistricting.

Tate Theater losing money.

Even sneak previews, such as last year’s showing of Alexander, provide little to no profit, Trawick said.

That might be because they're free. Some people think competition is the problem, but it's not like the number of theaters in town has increased recently. If anything, with the Georgia Theater's replacing its screen, competition should be decreasing. Others think it's a lack of advertising, and that's always been true. I'm sure the same factors that have contributed to declining attendance at other theaters are an influence here, but most of all, to me, it's that it doesn't feel like such a great deal anymore. You have to pay for parking in the Tate lot. You're certainly not guaranteed a space. Tickets have gone up to $3 for students and $4 for nonstudents. You may not even get a projected film. And when you do, the projectionists aren't nearly as well trained as they used to be. Not to mention the films scheduled have really suffered from a lack of quality. Tell me why I'd want to make the effort to go see something like The Shawshank Redemption in the theater when I can catch it any weekend on TNT. (It also seems that they've cut the 3 p.m. showings, except on weekends. That's one move I can understand, as it was rare to get more than five people.)

[bugmenot ABH]

Remember when it was kind of cool to like Ray Romano because he didn't have the most popular TV show evar? No? There is a world beyond Cartoon Network, and this is your entree.

Corky commentary.

Remember this post from a few days ago, about what I was reading and the particular difficulties I faced? Nancy Franklin's review of Battlestar Galactica in the New Yorker sort of illustrates exactly what I'm trying not to do. That is, it is somehow not right to say "well, science fiction stuff is really stupid, but I like this, and so I'm going to justify it as not actually being science fiction (or being only tangentially so) or whatnot." It is not right, but it is certainly easy, especially when you're trying to hold on to whatever molecules of cool you've managed to hang on to. And obviously, it is helpful to have more to say than just "it's good" or "it's not good," and we are all snobs at times in our own way, but still, reading something like this makes one feel like watching a kid get picked on.

Get those ladies some longer pants.

“He started to go into a series of karate kicks in the middle of the floor while the bartender, waitress and several customers looked on,” Hayden reports. Thankfully, a star-struck fan agreed to buy him several J&B’s on the rocks. After devouring a plate of chicken wings and littering the floor with bones, the star left without tipping.

And you thought polite Christmas tree assault was the end of it? This is equal parts "dood!", grimacing, and reminder that TV is not reality.

Because you might miss it since it's in the AJC, here is nice fella John T's piece on meat-and-three eateries that focuses on the ones in Athens. Yours truly pointed him in the direction of a few of these, but you can't buy quotes like the ones from Dexter Weaver and Angelish Wilson. Notice this bit at the very bottom:

Want to explore the meat-and-three culture of Athens on your own? Join the SFA on April 8 for Camp Athens: An Edible Education in Oilcloth and White Linen. Meals and lectures will explore connections between traditional Southern cooking from institutions like Wilson's Soul Food and the haute Southern cuisine of boites like Five & Ten. Its chef, Hugh Acheson, is host; guest chefs include Scott Peacock of Watershed in Decatur. Registration details at southernfoodways.com.

I may be doing something for this. I may not. Either way, it should be worth your time if you're into grub.

[bugmenot AJC]

The commission rails against redistricting, but the vote's only 7-1 against. JMac has plenty of why Chasteen (dissenting) is an idiot, but I'd like to know who wasn't at the meeting. Clearly Chasteen and Dodson were there, but it's unclear who was in absentia. (R&B talks more to Kemp than anyone else and ends up playing the issue straight down the middle, presumably leading to the ridiculous editorial in favor of the split. I can tell you splitting the district will result in lower beer prices for everyone, too, but that don't make it so.) Also SPLOST 05 funds will contribute $4 million to building a skyway bridge between two parts of the Classic Center, parts that one can actually move between right now, parts that aren't separated by a four-lane highway or even a particularly busy road. $4 million. So conventioners don't get wet for two seconds. Because it's not like we could use decent public transportation or anything.

HOPE scholarship --> hard drugs?

If you, too, can awkwardly point at the sky, you might be eligible for an award (if you have the requisite genitalia).

By golly, Sonny boy might not be fully committed to ethics in government despite saying a thing or two about it from time to time.

"Act like a river because when a girl meets a stranger she holds back like a dam — go until your stopped and make a move when you’re let through again."

[bugmenot ABH]

Because Mr. Brown decided he had to wait to see those last two episodes of Veronica Mars before watching this week's new one and that instead we would tape it. So instead we watched Charlie act like a big fucking baby. Everyone else too. Man of faith Locke gets punchy. Claire does her usual hysteria thing (and doesn't understand that baptism is kind of beside the point if you don't actually believe in it). And how's that army-building going? Some tarps stretched over some sticks, eh?

Coming up on the show (pointedly not "next week"), something that seems like excitement because it is edited together extremely quickly and backed by pulse-pounding music, even though what it really is is clips of people sitting around doing nothing, as always. Nice try, y'all. You really almost did get me.

Here's a fine insight for you, courtesy of David Levering Lewis's review of the third part of Taylor Branch's America in the King Years:

King had begun to perceive that society tends to confine its indignation to injustices that can be attenuated without imperilling fundamental economic relationships.

Tad Friend's online Q&A on his article about the TV popularity of vehicular pursuit in LA should make you want to go buy the magazine.

1. Wake up to alarm going off very loud, 45 past the hour.
2. Usually wake up at 25 past hour. Flip out. Leave house fast, wondering why backup alarm did not go off.
3. Once outside ponder on how very dark it is. Often the moon and stars are not quite so visible as this.
4. And much colder than usual.

Query: How long (in blocks) does it take you to figure out what's going on? You have had some coffee, but not as much as you usually would have.

More satisfying than Jim Thompson biking to work on a challenge, less satisfying than the forced reeducation of George Will. Snobby-pants Bruni works as a waiter for a week. Learns my god but people are rude. e.g.,

Bryan, a young server with whom I'm training, brings me up to speed on the crazy things diners do. They let their children run rampant, a peril to the children as well as the servers. They assume that the first table they are shown to is undesirable and insist on a different one, even if it's demonstrably less appealing. They decline to read what's in front of them and want to hear all their options. Servers disparagingly call this a "menu tour."

...I'm shadowing Tina, who has worked at the East Coast Grill for decades and seen it all. She is handling the same section Bryan did. She offers a psychological profile of a woman sitting alone at L-3, who declared the chocolate torte too rich and announced, only after draining her margarita, that it had too much ice.

"Some people are interested in having the experience of being disappointed," Tina says.

...I encounter firsthand an annoyance that other servers have told me about: the diner who claims an allergy that doesn't really exist. A woman at X-10, which is a table for two, or a "two top," repeatedly sends me to the kitchen for information on the sugar content of various rubs, relishes and sauces.

But when I ask her whether her allergy is to refined sugar only or to natural sugars as well, she hems, haws and downgrades her condition to a blood sugar concern, which apparently doesn't extend to the sparkling wine she is drinking.

Are we all psychotic these days? Is this just the way one always feels working in a customer service job? Is it only to add to the excitement of the piece? Is it a New York thing?

Not the latest Crayola. Stereogum's posted Pink's new video, which is a mix of celebrity mocking (occasionally amusing), girl power platitudes, and a kinda catchy hook on the chorus. Oh, and there's vomit in it. All the bits about how she wants boobies are awkward to watch, but the bits where she plays Jessica Simpson (in mid-car-wash) are well done--the way she throws herself into the parts reminds me a bit of Jenny McCarthy when she had her sketch show. It's not always good, and it's definitely not subtle, but it does provoke the occasional giggle.

I believe what I'm hearing you say is a wisecrack about how badly people drive in the ACC. Also how this exemplifies the gubner's approach to funding education (even though he's not the one who removed it from the budget).

It's possible that Bob Smith's proposal that we locate higher education programs that need space in abandoned buildings shouldn't have been phrased exactly the way it was (makes one think of Hostel and the like), and it's possible it's a bad proposal anyway (allowing the state government to act like it's doing more than it is), but if Sonny's just gonna skip around on the list and fund whatever gets him the most votes, some kind of solution is welcome.

Parental notification of school activities bill is alive and kicking. And proponents of the voter ID bill are lifting their inspirational phrases from el presidente (or, rather, his speechwriter).

Walter Jones tells us that now Cox is the moderate and Taylor the communist.

Suck it, crazy lady.

R&B has a very detailed timeline (including vomit) of the night Lewis Fish died.

[bugmenot ABH]

You can find 'em in Emerson's magnificent interview with the fella, which does a mighty fine job capturing the appeal, the hero status, the lifestyle.

There is something very postmodern fiction about the following entry. Mostly the word "containing":

Damage: On Jan. 16, a resident of Long Creek Drive reported that a material that appeared to be laundry detergent and eggs had been thrown on his vehicle. A bag containing a fingerprint was taken into evidence.

I cannot say that I would notice if this were the case in my house:

Theft: On Jan. 10, a resident of Aycock Road reported someone entered her home. She discovered the burglary after noticing that the peanut butter and bread was out of place, along with the shampoo in her shower. A key chain, valued at $1, along with some social security cards and birth certificates were stolen.

We repeat: "boyfriend's wife."

Harassment: On Jan. 17, a Watkinsville woman called to report that her boyfriend's wife had called and cursed at her. She said the woman actually threatened to come to her home and kick her rear end. The deputy explained there wasn't much he could do because her boyfriend's wife didn't live in Oconee County.

That is, of course, the correct place to store a brick:

Arrest: On Jan. 21, deputy Byron Smith was dispatched to Sourwood Court for a domestic argument. When he arrived, he saw a man bleeding from the head, a wound the victim said was inflicted by his wife, Tameika Victoria Smith, 27. She denied hitting her husband, but retrieved the brick from a closet and said she had hit him on the leg or foot. She was charged with battery.

It was quite a busy week. A million more entries here.

Review of The Swear's EP. And a little mock in this week's Grub Notes.

The best thing about Kanye's upcoming Rolling Stone Jesus cover is the way you can imagine he's reacting to every other headline up there.

"Cat Power, I feel your pain."

"Oh, Bode Miller, my son, you must learn to control your appetites."

"Battlestar Galactica, it maketh me weep that your DVD set of season 1 costs $60 in-store."

WB + UPN = CW? To be distinguished from C&W. I kind of dig this approach, earthshaking and weird as it is, since the stuff I like is staying on. Plus Smackdown.

UPN and the WB have struggled to attract viewers from the four established networks since they were launched in the mid-1990s. But each has its strengths.

The WB has had some hits throughout its history, particularly with younger audiences, having done well lately with shows such as "Smallville" and "Gilmore Girls."

UPN has recently gained some critical acclaim and strong ratings for its sitcom "Everybody Hates Chris," which airs on Thursday nights and fared well against shows such as NBC's "Joey" and Fox's "The O.C."

I like this chunk because it seems to be explaining what those strengths are without actually managing to do so. Perhaps someday (perhaps today) we will find out what "CW" stands for, but for now, it's fun to say "kwuh." Long live Kwuh!

[Update: The C is from CBS, the W from Warner Brothers, and the whole thing means nothing. Kwuh!]

Please note that state senator Regina Thomas (Savannah) has bigger balls than anyone else in state government. I'm sure her seat is perfectly safe, but still, it's far too easy to vote yes on this ridiculous sales tax break on natural gas that saves the consumer virtually nothing while depriving the state of needed moneys.

State Sen. Regina Thomas, D-Savannah, was one of three senators who voted against the bill Monday, arguing that it was a feel-good item to pass during an election year.

"This is a joke, and I'm not going to be a part of it," said Thomas, who called for legislators instead to think about re-establishing state regulation over Georgia's natural gas industry. "We need to get a backbone in here and do something to help the people of this state, and this is not going to do it."

High frickin' five.

Peer pressure strikes again?

A University of Georgia student reported he was robbed by a group of young men who jumped him early Sunday as he was walking home to Russell Hall from downtown, Athens-Clarke police said.

A man approached the student at the corner of West Broad and Hull streets at about 2 a.m. and asked for money, the student told police. When he refused, the man continued to follow, telling the student he had something "really cool" to show him across the street, the student told police.

The student crossed the road and was attacked by a group of about six men who knocked him to the ground and kicked him before stealing his wallet that contained $30 and identification, police said.

[Here in the ABH]

Awesomeness continues. Here is what Heather said:

But most enjoyable of all was the Chloe Gets Laid story line. Geeky Chloe, nerdy, troublemaking, whiny Chloe, has always been an oddly appealing, extremely out-of-place presence at CTU. Chloe represents all of us comfort seekers at home, watching the show. She's the conduit for all of our anxieties, she represents all of our flaws, flaws that would quickly emerge in a pressure-cooker setting like CTU. Chloe embodies the best and the worst traits of regular, everyday non-heroes like you and me. And that means that when Chloe gets a piece, we all get a piece, chickens.

And it is amazing, indeed, that such an odd character has not only not died in the seasons she's been around, but ascended up the ladder in terms of billing for the show and size of character part. Do the writers just love her? Or do they know the secret nerd heart that beats inside most of us 24 fans? Sure, it's a vastly popular TV show, watched by millions in the States alone, but I'd be willing to bet the percentage of geekazoids who dig on it hard is higher than for, say, Grey's Anatomy.

Malibu's Most Wanted: Watched this weekend and clearly made such a strong impression on my mind that I neglected to remember I'd seen it for a day or two there. Yeah, there're a lot of "blacky acts whitey" and "whitey is a wigga" jokes. They come with the territory. Some are funny. Some are not. But Jamie Kennedy is good at this kind of thing, and he's good at making me like him. He's not wussy about committing to a character, and the laziness of the movie kind of goes along with the improvisatory nature of his canceled TV show. Is it weird as fuck to see Bo Derek and, especially, Ryan O'Neal in this? It is, but there is a suprising amount of acting talent present: Jeffrey Tambor, Taye Diggs, Blair Underwood, Anthony Anderson (don't mock). I didn't mind watching it on Comedy Central.

A particularly nice paragraph from Steven Shapin's "Eat and Run: Why We're So Fat," an essay masquerading as a book review, in the New Yorker:

In the early-modern period, books of manners recommended that a gentleman always eat in company. King James I warned his son never to eat alone, lest people think it was for the “private satisfying of your gluttonie, which ye would be ashamed should be publicklie seene.” The social setting was understood to set moral limits on consumption. The shared meal marked the beginning and the end of eating: there was a time to eat and a time to stop. The meal defined the when, the what, the how, the how long, and the how much. You adjusted your consumption to those who were eating with you. You didn’t have exactly what you wanted, exactly when you wanted it, and exactly as much as you might want. The marking, ordering, and, above all, limiting character of the shared meal remained largely intact into the twentieth century: Leith’s grandmother used to warn him about appearing “greedy” at the table, and, while my own grandmother absolutely required that we have “seconds,” it was not a great idea to be seen eating when she wasn’t feeding you. Sometime in the postwar era, though, the domestic meal began its unremitting decline. Now, like many of us, Leith mostly eats standing up—no grandmother, no mother, often no one at all to witness “greed.” The individualization of eating has done much to cut us free of dietary limits. We’ve been told that an index of our times is that we “bowl alone”; something similar might be said of our gastronomic habits. We eat alone and we get fat together.

At least two kinds of revulsion in only one police blotter item. How many kinds in this article about Gov. Perdue?

Another article covering the campaign to get at least one student Regent; this one contains more pricelessness from Kempy boy:

Because Kemp doesn't know "all the sides of the story," he isn't yet taking a position on the matter, he said.

"I understand where the students are coming from," he said.

Clearly several weeks, articles in both Athens media and elsewhere around the state (including the AJC), and the fact that it relates to his district didn't allow him time to decide how folks who could help him in his Ag Commish race feel about this issue.

UGA student dies in dorm, probably from too much drank, but administrators seem to be keeping things in perspective so far.

More explaining on the 65% education spending proposal.

Jim no comprende that satire is supposed to resemble what it's makin' fun of.

Winders brings the mock on redistricting, but seems to view stupidity and partisanship as separate things in this case.

Our man Pritchett lets students know that they can actually vote in this town.

There is, of course, mucho mas at AthPo and Safe as Houses.

[bugmenot ABH]

Here is Nancy Franklin on the appeal of Family Guy. Feel free to make fun of her for being behind the curve. She does say some interesting things about animation being produced mostly by dudes because dudes tend to think fart jokes are still funny, but this is the bit that jogged my brain into remembering what perhaps annoys me most about the show:

The show’s signature is its constant cutaways to scenes packed with inspired non sequiturs and references to everything that was thought up by Hollywood and Madison Avenue in the past hundred years—from Fatty Arbuckle to the DuMont Network, Mister Rogers, “Laugh-In,” and the Hope-Crosby “Road” pictures.

It's not the non sequiturs themselves so much. After all, The Simpsons does it too. (Though one could make the point that the earlier show does much, much more.) It's more the precise references themselves. The ones she's choosing don't feel representative to me. The Simpsons does a beautiful job drawing on the largest sphere of comic references possible, while Family Guy, to me, tends to make ones that are obvious. It's sort of the equivalent of someone asking you if you've seen Office Space yet. Not quite in the "yeah, baby, you make me horny" realm, but edging toward it. A-Ha = ha ha? Meh. Throw my knowledge a fucking bone, y'all. One of the things that is most marvelous about Gilmore Girls is that there are references I do not get. The point isn't whether they're accurate for certain characters to make or not. The point is that the show a) is not stupid, and b) does not assume I am (i.e., that my brain contains largely information from 1980 on). Ditto Veronica Mars.

Team Brown is now slightly more than halfway through season 4 of Smallville, having waited far, far too long to get around to it. And let it be said that season 4 is also known as "the season of the shower" because every time you turn around or get up for some popcorn or whatnot, someone's all silhouetted and steamy. And a-ha! I knew that writer's name was ringing some bells. You've got your classic "greatest fears" episode, your standard body-switching scenario (which actually allows Mr. Welling to show he's more than just a purty everything), lots of metaphors about secret-keeping, and, of course, the showers. Ahhh... the showers.

Week 2 Jukebox is up. And I am grouchy in it. I just felt it was a pretty weak week, Morningwood aside (and interestingly, they seem to be receiving some love, so maybe it's just reviewers who have reacted to their album with "ick"). Non-blurbed are as follows: Remiriomen [3], Party Squad [4] (howevs, Nederhop is clearly the word of the week), Pharrell [4], Ne-Yo [a solid 5], A-Ha [3], The Shortwave Set [5], Richard Hawley [6; note that his album is rapidly becoming one of my favorites from last year since I acquired it recently; this song is very late 60s to me], Bodies without Organs [6; and a shock to the system; utterly fucking ridiculous to the point of me actually enjoying the song], and Morningwood [7].

I understand Ian Mathers's reaction to Little Big Town but please know that it sucks for other reasons (as well).

Use the email link if you want to hear anything.

You know, if you're feeling a purgative is necessary.

1) XLR8. Trust me on this one.

2) Full compendium of Berman nicknames. Ow. It hurts.

Indianapolis Star has follow-up article on how Survivor's Rupert is the new Trump, because there are no other rich people to make the comparison to. Sidebar reads:

RUPERT'S SURVIVAL SKILLS

Tips from Rupert Boneham on surviving business (learned from his time on reality TV's "Survivor"):

1. Don't try to dominate and control the outcome of the game.

2. Lead by encouraging others to succeed.

3. Make sure your team is working toward common goals.

4. Be honest and fair in your dealings and you will get clients for life.

5. If you can help others be productive and increase their worth, it will increase your worth.

6. It never hurts to be the nice guy.

The last rule, which they left off is

7. Finish solidly in the middle of the pack, behind a lot of people (Raaaam-ber) who don't play by any of these rules and generally act like jerks.

[via]

Eric Konigsberg's New Yorker piece on the life and death of child prodigy Brandenn Bremmer ain't online, but emdashes talks about the reaction to it, which has been large. It's a fascinating article not least because the people most focused on (Bremmer's parents and child psychologist Linda Silverman) keep saying progressively more and more unbelievable things. That is, we move from:

"He chose when he would wean himself. I wanted to nurse for a full year, but at eleven months he crawled into the kitchen and motioned for a cup" [Patti Bremmer]

to

She [Silverman] described an effort, in the nineties, to eliminate gifted programs in public schools as "a form of discrimination that makes me think of Nazi Germany."

to, after Brandenn shot himself and his organs were donated,

"The latest from the hospital a few minutes ago was that Brandenn's kidneys were a 'Perfect Match' there were only 6 perfect matches in the US and the chances of those 6 getting kidneys were almost impossible. Once again Brandenn did the impossible. His liver went to a 22 month old baby that would have . . . died without it. His heart is now beating in the chest of an 11 year old boy who was down to hours . . . ." [Patti Bremmer]

to

"I'm ambivalent about Christianity, but a lot of people have said he reminded them of Jesus. You know: 'He came, he taught, he left.'" [PB]

to, from Silverman's husband, "a psychic and healer" who "has cured people of cancer,"

"Well, I can tell you what the spirits are saying," he said. "He was an angel. . . . Brandenn was an angel who came down to experience the physical realm for a short period of time. . . . I'm talking to him right now," he said. "He's become a teacher. He says right now he's actually being taught how to help these people who experience suicides for much messier reasons. Before Brandenn was born, this was planned. And he did it the way he did so that others would have use for his body. Everything worked out in the end."

Also, it's all Prison Break-y in parts wrt hyper-intelligence being connected to greater empathy yadda yadda. And one definitely gets a creepy "think of the children"/separatist vibe. But all the stuff that makes it hard to believe also makes it, um, hard to believe. Worth a read, though, if you can find it.

So, a couple of commissioners have been slightly swayed by the revised La Puerta del Sol plans, and a couple more not so much (not "one iota").

Commissioner Elton Dodson, who's publicly struggled with a decision on the development, implied he is leaning toward voting against allowing the project, although he likes the concept and design.

"In the end, my vote is going to have to be based on the people I represent on that side of town," he said.

Dodson came under enormous pressure from opponents last year for his ambivalence on the rezoning.

Fella doesn't represent me, apparently. Or anyone else who's in favor of the rezoning.

And ABH opines on the Bible bill, because a political stunt of this type is more likely to hurt business in the state than, say, our resounding "we hate the gays" vote in 04?

Graduate Council and Graduate Student Association at odds over new continuous enrollment policy that's going through. This hasn't been a big news story, but every grad student I know is unhappy about it (and simultaneously resigned to its passing). It's understandable that the university wants people to finish their degrees faster. Clearly, that desire's been driving plenty of policy for undergrads, too, but increased requirements, decreased available classes, and more seem to keep making it harder to complete a degree at the same time that those having difficulty graduating have to pay a financial penalty.

People di'int like the "Brumby butt" article in the R&B?

Lauren Morgan writes about her experiences post-WVU-fans column.

[bugmenot ABH]

Keyshia out-Bliges Blige. New video, "Love," was premiered on 106th and Park the other day (and can be watched at AOL Music), complete with an enthusiastic in-studio appearance from the girl herself, during which, when she was asked to explain in 10 seconds why people should buy her album, she merely lifted the mic and sang the chorus to this song, full-bore, all-out, and both totally live and perfect. It's one of the show-off tracks for her strange, big, scratchy, broken up voice. I can't say I approve of the ridonkulous coat featured therein, but girlfriend does heartbreak in vocal form better than anyone out there right now. (And it's nice to see that her album's still on displays in stores.)

First, let it be said that Borders is evil for running those "buy 3, get 1 free" sales, as any person with any desire both to obtain things and to save money while doing so cannot possibly resist, resulting in far too much time spent trying to make equations come out right.

Anyway, Danger! 50,000 Volts was one of the package, and it is as entertaining as hoped, though in odd, inconsistent ways. Sort of like The Worst Case Scenario Survival Handbook TV show that was on briefly and sort of like Mythbusters, but then with more humor and information that is only occasionally useful (though the bit about how to create a solar still to condense drinkable water into a cup if you're in the desert was duly noted). Nick Frost is quite inherently funny, though, so even a mild reaction shot can result in ridiculous amounts of laughter. There also seems to be a moment in every show where he receives morphine for some reason or other (frostbite recovery, pole through chest) and drifts into a marvelous reverie.

R&B has an article about ID scanners being tested at one bar downtown. Here is what you need to know:

1) The bar in question is Flanagan's, not exactly the unfriendliest place for underage drinkers.
2) All they're doing is testing them for the company that manufactures these, not implementing them.
3) Most of the quotes in the article are from that company (e.g., "That’s why we need technology because we cannot tell from a naked eye truly anymore (if an ID is valid)”).
4) Georgia's driver's licenses are particularly difficult to scan. Only the most sophisticated machine this company makes can catch mistakes on them.
5) IDs are scanned only at the door, so if you have another way into the bar, you'd seem to be clear.
6)

Athens-Clarke County also has tentative plans to include the installation of ID scanners as part of recommendations for bars that have committed a third violation of selling alcohol to minors, said Athens-Clarke County attorney Bill Berryman.

“We recognize that it’s a limited tool, but it does do a pretty good job of eliminating fake documents,” Berryman said.

Since there has been only one third-time violator in the past few years, Berryman said he does not anticipate recommendation to affect many other bars.

7) Think about the slowdown that would result.
8) The freshman in question provides the closing quote: "It’s always been kind of don’t ask, don’t tell." To which, um, no. There are looser bars and tighter bars in Athens, but the analogy is both an odd one to choose and pretty much entirely wrong.

That is correct, honey. Clearly, the show's already bastardized, and the lady quoted certainly has her place in TV cooking shows, and she's damn sight better than the other chickie roped into this thing, but... sputter... [via]

My outside-of-class reading for the past few days has been Lirael by Garth Nix, part of (brace for it) a fantasy trilogy by Garth Nix, the first one of which I read a few years ago and found unexpectedly gripping and good. Philip Pullman said the first one (Sabriel) is "fantasy that reads like realism," so there's at least that to recommend it. So, I'm enjoying it, and when one's brain is occupied with this and that all over the place, it is sort of satisfying to be able to read a 700+-page book in a work week. But it is also good for me to carry the book around, it being indeed very squat and mass-markety, full of medieval-looking fonts, and with a cover illustration that, while it doesn't contain any dragons, clearly marks it as not high literary fiction. And then, of course, I've been asked about it at least once (by the dude who waits at the same bus stop I do). And I have to explain. And I also have to try not to talk down the book. Basically, I think I'm not at the same place with books that I am with music in terms of not being embarrassed by things, and so this is a little of a learning process. And besides, I'm totally going to read the third one. (Sidebar: Note that there does exist an "adult" copy of the book, which has a maybe slightly less geeky cover and proper trade dimensions, but I chose not to get that one so as to save a dollar.)

Because ain't no one else talking about it yet. So the Regents and UGA officials are talking about snagging the Navy School property for some kind of partnership with the Medical College of Georgia, though they won't say yet what exactly.

Until university and system officials know whether they will get the property, they don't know what kind of partnership could exist between the university and the medical college, Regents Chairman Timothy Shelnut said after the meeting.

Which is quite the load. Obviously, they have some idea and aren't talking about picking up that many acres just for kicks.

When asked how the regents might pay for the property, Shelnut said "we're not anywhere even near there - I hope it's free ... I would hope (the Department of Defense) would consider giving it to the university system."

So, clearly, this wouldn't result in any taxable property, but the idea of MCG having some sort of location here other than the nursing branch on Barnett Shoals and the connection to the pharmacy school is kind of a good one, and one would think the university could sell it to Athenians as a benefit to the community in other ways. If they're smart, they'll hook this up with the poverty initiative and figure out how to provide free or low-cost health care for the poor to help out the clinics that exist in Athens and have had their funding cut repeatedly. Sort of the equivalent of pro bono work for lawyers.

Also, please to note presence of Republicans sponsoring this redistricting nonsense at town meeting last night. Wait. They didn't care to show up? They couldn't give less of a flying fuck about what the people of Athens think? Shockah!

Oh Mr. Lewis. You are a nice fella. But folks who are at least six months late to the party don't get to mock. Do they?

This said, someone needs to make him a Kells mixtape, stat.

3) "An elderly woman beaten to death," Lamont continues. "Apparently a burglary gone bad. Possible attempt at sexual assault, nude, her panties down around her knees." [from the, uh, "Funny Pages," in Chapter 2 of a serial called "At Risk," by Patricia Cornwell, 01/15/06; har de har har]

4) As his camera moves in closer and amid the panting and ouch-worthy thumping against the wooden stairs, Mr. Cronenberg maintains a dead-eye, presentational perspective here, never assuming either character's point of view. He keeps this stance even at the pivotal moment when he transforms us from bystanders into voyeurs, a shift that happens the instant when, during the most violent part of the staircase rough-and-tumble, Edie's bare legs part to reveal a pair of spectacular thighs and black panties. (Now we know why she's wearing a skirt.) [from "Dark Truths of a Killing Love," a piece under the subhead "The Unforgettable Moment," on Cronenberg's A History of Violence, by (who else) Manohla Dargis, 01/15/06]

Note: Panty-watch is a regular feature here dedicated to tracking appearances of the word "panties" or "panty" in the New York Times, partially because it's amusing to see the Gray Lady venturing into such areas and partially to see if it correlates with anything specific. The end of the year should result in a few more graphs.

[previously] [bugmenot NYT]

I am weak. And I love the mocking. And apparently, I will actively seek out opportunities to bore myself. So. Anyway. This week on Lost: no characters did anything unexpected. Again. And I think this may be the real fault of the show (which Mr. Brown has taken to referring to as The New X-Files, which is true, only minus the occasional comedic episode). At first, we didn't know these people. Now that we do (with exceptions, like Rose and Bernard), they remain the same. It's possible that this reflects reality, but the grind of same-old same-old is not why we watch the TV. 24's characters are a bit static too, but at least there, we're distracted by shiny, twirling plot. (Sidebars: If it weren't clearly a plot device and Jack's dad hadn't talked to him about it, would y'all really have thought Jack and the daughter were flirting or whatever? Because maybe Matthew Fox is just that impassive as an actor. And why is Kate never allowed into the jungle?)

There are two examples of this kind of TV show that I will bring up now.

1. The Way of the Master, a.k.a. "Kirk Cameron accosts people on the street and harrasses them about Christianity." (Website of which, in broadband version, will provide you with the virtual version and allow you to watch episodes online.)

2. The Suite Life of Zack & Cody, a.k.a. "Those kids from Big Daddy still have jobs? But they're horrible?!" Yes. They do. And they are.

There are at least two different kinds of literal writhing that can be provoked by art, usually in the TV form. There is the kind that 24 and Veronica Mars produce, when you feel utterly and gloriously manipulated by a fabulous genius mind that is smarter than you are or at least better at pushing your buttons than most things. And then there is the kind that numbers 1 and 2 above produce, when you feel utterly theoretically manipulated (but not actually) by a mind that is far dumber than you are or at least not interested in trying to work on a higher level. (Note that this is different from a simple show like AFV, which is not interested in trying to work on a higher level, but results in laughter rather than a kind of psychic pain.)

So there is pleasurable mental pain and then there is more painful mental pain. Really good TV results in the former. The arguments presented in The Way of the Master and the "comedy" of Zack & Cody result in the latter. Not that it's not still watchable. It's just more along the lines of dudes daring each other to eat high-capsaicin-level stuff.

Added: Y'all cannot tell me you don't watch The Way of the Master either. Because I know you do.

I don't even want to watch Lost, y'all. And yet, the forces in charge of UPN are practically pulling a Clockwork Orange on me by continuing to rerun Veronica Mars (and not even reruns I haven't seen). Do I have the strength to resist the possibility of Michael shooting people when my real show I've switched allegiances for isn't really on? I think I am very weak indeed.

There is one in the video for Joe Nichols's "Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off," but that's not how I was introduced to the song or why it's worth your time to go listen to it (e.g., at AOL Music). One of the occasionally nice side effects of riding the campus buses is the presence of the driver's choice of music, and there's one lady in particular with a weakness for the country. So this came on the other morning and grabbed my attention, even in the early a.m. brain haze. It's walking the line between novelty song and real song, but I think it tips over into the territory most people are more comfortable with due to Nichols's Travis-flavored voice. Does it make my knees weak the way Randy can with a mere twangy dip into the low range? Meh. Not so much. But he sells the title line well enough to curl around wherever it is physiologically that stores catchy tunes. The rest of his stuff seems okay, but this is the song.

Just because the hobbyhorse has been sent to the glue factory doesn't mean Police Blotter has been laid off too.

Theft: On Jan. 10, a resident of Wire Bridge Road reported that someone went to his home and stole a green Yamaha Grizzly 600 four-wheeler that was parked under his deck. The vehicle, with a one-ton wench, is valued at $7,240.

That's a big gal.

Arrest: On Jan. 10, deputy Jay Parker was dispatched to a dispute on Oakwood Drive, between a man and his two children. The man said he got home and found that the two had skipped school, so he tried to avoid an argument. When a stray dog wandered into the yard, the man got some rocks and started throwing them at the dog. The daughter began cursing and threatened him if he actually hit the dog. When he addressed her language, the son joined the argument and threatened to assault his father with a fire poker. The law was called, but both children had left when Parker arrived. However, he saw them off Oliver Bridge Road. They ran into the woods, but Parker called for them to come out. He took both back to the house and the son, Jacob Doster, 18, was arrested on a charge of making a terroristic threat. The daughter was not charged.

Which is best: intro that seems beside the point, "addressed her language," or the simple beauty of "the law was called"?

Arrest: On Jan. 10, security at Kohl's called for help when a shoplifter ran from the store. Security had observed the man in the store about 4:10 p.m., where he went to the shoe department. He obtained a trash bag and placed some shoes into the bag. Security watched as he walked around the store, then leave without paying. When he was confronted outside the store, he dropped the bag and took off running, losing a shoe and his cell phone in the process. Deputies Shane Partain and Kevin Nolley responded to the call and Partain saw the suspect on the Epps Bridge Road bridge, where upon seeing the deputy, he went over the bridge. Partain stopped on Tangle Brook Drive, where he shouted for the man to stop, but the man looked back, then ran along a creek to get away. Partain went into the woods and began hunting for the man. Partain searched along a path and was able to find the suspect hiding in a thicket, where he had laid on the ground and cleverly covered himself with leaves and sticks. Nolley arrived and they cuffed the suspect. Adarian Dillard, 36, of West Paces Drive, Athens, was taken to jail on charges of felony shoplifting, obstruction and giving false information.

He teaches a course at the community college in wilderness survival skills.

Arrest: On Jan. 10, deputy Jay Parker was on patrol at Arbor Glenn Mobile Home Park about 12:30 p.m., where he observed a car leave the area and pass through two stop signs without stopping. He pulled the car and learned that Lynette White, 40, of Kings Mill Run, Athens, had no driver's license. However, as he talked with the woman, he observed that she was nervous, so he asked if she used crack cocaine. She told him 'not lately.' She allowed the deputy to search the black Camaro, and Parked found a napkin containing a rock of crack cocaine. She admitted that she purchased the cocaine in the trailer park from an unknown male. She was arrested for possession of cocaine.

What does "lately" really mean when we're talking crack? (The rest is here.)

Hot shotz of David Foster Wallace reading in San Francisco. Query: Are unfortunately cuffed jeans counterbalanced by really cute eyeglasses?

I, for one, will not be satisfied until they make a Cheezit flavored yogurt in a disposable tube.

To hell with it. I have things that need doing. Consider it in a coma state here for now. AthensPolitics has loads up. JMac will generally cover things in depth fairly often too. If I see a story being massively overlooked, I will try to step in and warm up the defibrillator.

Dear Mark Warner,

When Stephanopolous asks you if it is okay for the president to spy on American citizens without a warrant, the answer is very simple, and it is not hemming and hawing about this and that. Unless, you know, you don't care about either: a) me flipping you off, or b) votes from, uh, Democrats.

Love,
me

The thing is, sometimes it's hard to find new ways of saying things. And if you care at all about communicating in a way that is more than rudimentary grunting (for which, see, e.g., RoboDave in the comments on the Day Jobs), you're going to make an effort to vary your speech, even in small ways, like finding a synonym for commonly used words. Take the Middle East, for example. It's hard to come up with new designations for the region. So who's stepped into the void (rushing in where angels fear to tread, one could say)? Our buddy Chrissy-poo, with his new phrase "that al-Qaeda land over there." Can we get that on a Neighborhoodie?

If you didn't know it by comparison with Veronica Mars (and it would be understandable if you didn't), you might choose, instead, 24, four hours into its new season already and scaring the beejesus out of us pretty darn consistently. Perhaps it's just the glow of love reawakened when things start up again, but it feels that the show is definitely on the upswing again. Last season contained much greatness, but even that did not raise the pulse quite to the level it's hitting this time around. For one thing, ruthlessness has been reestablished. Oh you thought we were afraid to kill off major characters before, watchers? Take that! And also that! And maybe that (but maybe life after all, only with horrible burning on the face, which might even be more for the good of the show than death for all parties)! Also: Chloe is gettin' some sex, Jean Smart is rivaling Mrs. Palmer as a fascinating character, and Jack has reasserted self as best dude named that on TV. Acting and action. It can be done.

Stylus has thumped the jukebox to start it up again.

Among songs not blurbed, I think the Ashcroft is pretty boring, the Arctic Monkeys is a bit better than it averaged, the Lee Harding is as advertised, the Busta is one of my least favorite tracks this week (and I kinda like the Daft Punk song it samples), the Jose Gonzalez is v. v. good, the Ashlee is better than some folks think, the Veronicas somewhere in the middle, it's possible I just don't like Will Young, Twista continues the suck, and the Belle & Sebastian is a fair pick for song of the week, even if it's not mine.

Dude! No one else likes the Mark Owen? Okay, obviously some people do, but not that many among those voting. Or the love was canceled out by the hate.

As ever, feel free to request a listen in my gmail box.

[Sidebar: We are not liking the new layout at all.]

Gawker misses the joke. Because they're not really the types to think Coke's all that evil. (One Two Three imdb page)

Updated: Corrected now.

New best website ever?

Listening to this new local CD Mr. Hassiotis passed along for a review and vaguely grooving along to a song I think keeps repeating "fresh manure" in its chorus, because, like, eh, he's kind of country.

Look at track listing.

"Freshman Year."

1) Bifurcating of Athens into two state senate districts to help elect Kemp's brother-in-law is first bill to hit floor of the senate and, of course, passes. Note that Glenn Richardson is still cutting people (i.e., Jane Kidd) off while they're speaking. As though the current folks in power haven't made their love for democracy emininently clear. We won't be stuck with Kemp for too much longer, but I'm sure he'd love to hear how you feel about this issue. But I'm sure locals were consulted and their views taken into consideration... No? Huh. Note that the Chamber of Commerce totally digs the idea, according to Blake.

Hudgens introduced the redistricting bill at the request of the chamber and Madison County officials, who wanted a small slice of the county in Kemp's district returned to Hudgens', he said. He called the criticism of his redistricting plan "partisan," and said his map is the only way to split Clarke County and unify Madison County without violating the Voter Rights Act by diluting minority voting power.

Wow. Consider jaw dropped. Maybe we could get, I dunno, an editorial on the subject?

2) State of the University address focuses mostly on minority recruitment. Increased revenues from the UGA Bookstore (now that it's being leased to FTX) will result in $500K a year for four years to fund outreach. Also, tuition will go up again to enable UGA to increase faculty salaries but not hire more faculty. ABH likes the move. R&B's report on the same has more details about exactly where Adams would like tuition to end up. Student reactions to the speech. AJC brings out that half the annual $500K for minority recruitment will go directly to students and half will go into an endowment managed by the Arch Foundation. Two birds. One stone.

3) Four-laning of 72 the whole way to South Carolina has opponents (in places it's already been four-laned, like Colbert) and proponents (in places it hasn't, like Elberton). It's not that there's too much traffic so much as that four-laning makes the road theoretically safer and is supposed to spark economic development (i.e., trucks?).

The broad highway, which in Colbert has a raised median instead of a grass one, is still a source of irritation for some in Colbert, including long-time Mayor John Waggoner. The raised median rules out left turns into many of the businesses and streets along the road, forcing traffic to go through residential neighborhoods, Waggoner said.

The raised median is supposed to be there for safety, but that's not what older residents feel, he said. They feel more endangered now crossing the street.

Are there no breaks in the median the entire way? And aren't older residents displacing the danger caused by the addition of more lanes onto the defenseless median? Anyway, this is the kind of long-range, highly complicated project that should provide nerd fascination for some time.

4) The BC to get ExpressPoll machines for voting, which sound extremely impressive and supposedly will lead to magical in-and-out-like-that-type efficiency, but how exactly that'll happen is never specified. Do they run on fairy dust?

5) Modified voter ID bill passes house, but Heard and Kidd vote no.

6) Chase Street Elementary gets bond funds under reduced class size initiative to renovate.

7) Letters: Poverty initiative rules, even if taxes end up raised. And, like, the wallpaper doesn't even match! Dude from Maryland (?) writes in re: Nakanishi to say that calmness and scientific data are needed on TCE, points out that "the state Environmental Protection Division doesn't have an established exposure limit, likely because it is waiting on the federal Environmental Protection Agency to refigure its risk calculations."

8) Franklin College Cultural Activities and Events Program knows what motivates students. This is a really smart idea and rigorous enough to discourage people who will go to cultural events but sit in the back and talk. And speaking of this sort of thing, the new, shorter drop-add has come and gone, and some students hate it, while others are merely indifferent.

9) John Knox thinks ratemyprofessors.com is relatively accurate, and he's an instructor, not a student.

10) Rachel Boyd cannot tell the difference between a movie and reality.

11) It's confirmed. Perdue's not restoring the austerity cuts to education and, in fact, is reducing per-pupil funding that goes to transportation (new school buses, anyone?), staff development, and teacher salaries. Supposedly, these cuts, totaling $169.7 million, are temporary, but we've heard that line before. Un-fucking-believable. The full article details what's been cut and when and how much and exactly how pissed teachers are. Gwinnett Daily Post says a whole mill has been earmarked for staffing the new college there and notes that there is a long way to go yet before things are really operational.

12) Chip Rogers is a total pussy. At least when it comes to one of anti-immigrant bills.

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

1) All around Ms. Lauren and Mr. Buck were designs in development: plates, umbrellas, bags. These, along with the rainbows of M&M's, gummy bears and jawbreakers -- plus the chocolate bubble bath, Swarovski crystal Pez dispensers, striped scarves, candy panties and ''I 3/5sheart 4/5 Goobers'' T-shirts already for sale -- are the signs of what Ms. Lauren hopes will grow into a diversified candyland in which candy girls, and perhaps a few candy boys, will turn to Dylan's not just for sweets but also for candy-theme housewares, apparel, spa products and parties. [from "Candy-Colored Dreams" by Erika Kinetz, 01/01/06]

2) At first glance, Puerto Grande is stunning, a cuticle of fine sand in a lagoon framed by black lava rocks lapped by warm green waters. But fishermen have legally used the beach for years to strip and repaint their boats. A short walk inland uncovered scraps of plastic, panties and a disturbing mound of toilet paper. [from "Galápagos Unbound" by Tim Neville, 01/08/06]

Note: Panty-watch is a regular feature here dedicated to tracking appearances of the word "panties" or "panty" in the New York Times, partially because it's amusing to see the Gray Lady venturing into such areas and partially to see if it correlates with anything specific.

Blow Out: Jonathan's a Daddy Now and Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List: I better just be breaking up with my awesome husband to create a better show returning to Bravo. Everything this article lists sounds pretty much equally great.

There is just no call for this. First mocking of Spenser and now, much later in the book, this, which is more between Thursday and Gran:

"While we're here," she went on, changing the subject without drawing breath, "can you think of any books that might be included in the 'ten most boring classics'? I'm about ready to go.:

"Gran!"

"Indulge me, young Thursday!"

I sighed.

"How about Paradise Lost?"

Gran let out a loud groan.

"Awful! I could hardly walk for a week afterwards--it's enough to put anyone off religion for good!"

"Ivanhoe?"

"Pretty dull but redeemable in places. It isn't in the top ten, I think."

"Moby-Dick?"

"Excitement and action interspersed with mind-numbing dullness. Read it twice."

"A la recherche du temps perdu?"

"English or French, its sheer tediousness is undiminished."

Hoo boy. Remember that column in the Red & Black about the toothless, poor WVU fans? Meet the webbernets, Miss Morgan. It is not a pretty place.

A. Me.

Q. Who just got an actual career-furthering job, meaning blogging will be dead during work hours in about two weeks, but boredom will be more than compensating for by duties that are actually fulfilling?

One of these is Amy Diamond. Yes. You may call be obsessed.

The other is Jules Shear, off his upcoming record.

They are very different. The Shear is the most up-tempo track on his album, which is a little slow. The Diamond is one of many I haven't been able to get out of my head. Enjoy?

Because I'm reading the Nibelungenlied, specifically in a prose translation that's not insanely inspiring in terms of the language. I like the work, but I can't figure out what to put up here. It is oddly obsessed a la Joan Rivers with what people are wearing. And it makes me want to see the two Lang films.

See post title.

1) State of the state address: edumacation, but not so much the higher kind, and also not so much with the fully funding the whole thing ("fully funding classroom reductions," which you might think, if you turned your head or went to go get a Coke, meant funding all of it, but clearly doesn't (also a proposal to buy 1,000 new school buses, which doesn't really seem to go along with this 65-percent crap); fancy things like nanotechnology and biofuels; "Meth Force" (15 whole dudes); and tax breaks, most of which were passed earlier and are now taking effect. Kemp speaks positively about it; Democrats don't. Also, what's with the gift card? AJC says it gives teachers $100 to spend on classroom materials, but uh, why in gift card form? What if you don't spend the whole $100? Where can it be used? It seems like it's included mostly because it can be held up and literally pointed to. Cox and Taylor respond, the former talking mostly about health care and the latter about protecting HOPE.

2) Step taken toward historic preservation designation for downtown. There seem to be a lot of very reasonable stances taken in the first draft of historic preservation regulations, which will take an eon and a half to go into effect. Commission is working on guidelines in lieu of a moratorium until the new designation is established. One guy's not on board:

"If I own a building downtown, it's my building, not your building, and you shouldn't tell me what to do with it," said one man, who declined to give his name.

Hell, maybe he doesn't believe in fire codes either. I believe these are the proposed guidelines, but the distinction between "guidelines" and "regulations" isn't addressed very clearly on the ACC site. i.e., Are these the ones for the proposed historic district? Or are they the interim ones? In any case, they include a photo of the 1901 Athens Wheat and Oat Fair.

3) State Benefit Health Plan kind of goes out of its way to screw teachers. UGA's not on this, but there was some buzz around here when this was first proposed. a) It's not very fair in the first place. b) It's been implemented in a truly sucky fashion. So remember this as much as you remember your possible gift cards, educators.

4) Athens isn't among the 20 meanest cities to the homeless, but it's not exactly friendly.

5) Barrow County's revised homestead exemption for seniors has income and property value restrictions, which makes it much improved. Also, they are gonna annex that property for the jail.

6) State votes on funding voter ID equipment for all counties (yes, but won't withstand court scrutiny) and on bullshit gas tax halving (yes).

7) State of the University address at 3:30 today. Won't talk about Navy School plans because they're not ready.

8) R&B digs the 4 percent salary increase Perdue has proposed, but mentions restoring cuts to higher education and the fact that it's an election year. Yay skepticism! Whereas the ABH calls it "rewarding lackluster results in the classroom," ignoring the inclusion of state employees in the raise pool, proving it hasn't learned from the last column judging education in business terms, and pegging student achievement to teacher pay (which, huh?). It is interesting that Perdue's proposing to borrow the money needed to reduce class sizes, though. More details on that would be welcome.

9) Josh Love makes like The Strokes aren't a pop act. And doesn't like Morningwood (but is nicer than Pitchfork, which doesn't understand the difference between a chant and singing something).

10) Letters: Splitting Athens in two state senate-wise means Republican-controlled state govt loses credibility. PR for Salvation Army points out that they're operating a homeless shelter. Rural schools should consolidate.

11) Regents still working on boosting retention.

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

You could watch Lost. Or you could read this account on Stereogum of Jon Pareles's interview of Death Cab dudes.

1) Is that Pareles on the left? Dude. No wonder he likes U2.

2)

Yet Ben says that everyone needs a gateway to get into music -- if people find out about Stars or Mates of State via Death Cab or The O.C., then more power to them. If people figure out that "Ashlee Simpson really is shitty," even better.

Will we ever move past the Ashlee-mocking as a nation? It is roughly analogous to the macarena, and by this point, it should be roughly analogous to the macarena in 1998 or so, assuming late 1996 to mid-1997 as the time of most-macarena-ness. Don't be so lazy, Death Cab. Make a little effort to find someone who sucks more. Say... Jessica Simpson.

It is astonishing how this show has gotten to the point where it can make even things that were formerly interesting not so. Namely: Mr. Eko. The smoke stuff. Michael and Walt's correspondence. The thing is, since Lost last aired, both the wonders of Gilmore Girls season 5 and Veronica Mars have been experienced, and the thing those two shows have in common and Lost lacks is speed. Start counting the seconds reaction shots take on Lost. I know it's meant to build the drama, but what it builds instead is a sense that the writers are desperately trying to stretch out what tiny amounts of plot they actually do have written. An episode in which not even the relatively undramatic promise "Sawyer gets a haircut" is fulfilled (try a trim, y'all) is, uh, not such a good episode.

Compare: Keillor. Me.

Different reasons, and I'm sure not going to bring up Ariel Sharon as a positive example, but still, it's an idea whose time is coming.

I was musing, in the light of Frey and LeRoy, about which writer I would pick to be making it all up, if I could. And I thought, in light of her regular Salon pieces (this one, for example), that maybe I would like it to be Ayelet Waldman. The confessional stuff tends to creep me out in her case more than in a lot, and this without drugs and violence and people getting put in jail or being tattooed. She's kind of the more national-scale version of Athens's Deroshia.

Lo and behold. She has a piece today that's actually on LeRoy. (Note: Michael Chabon is cooler than I thought he was.)

1) So Sonny wants to give me a raise and not raise health insurance costs this year, which is nice and all, but a) it's not going to make me vote for him, b) it's a pretty transparent ploy ("Democrats in the legislature say his earlier budget requests show he never cared much about education before and that he's only putting the money in now because he's worried about his re-election chances"), and c) so how about, uh, fully funding education in Georgia? Also:

State School Superintendent Kathy Cox said the 65 percent rule will make local leaders more open to suggestions from state officials about proven techniques for improving student performance.

"It's really not meant to be draconian," she said.

It ain't meant to be. It just is. R&B covers too, notes that these aren't a sure thing and that restoring austerity cuts hasn't been decided on yet, quotes a bunch of university people saying the world "faculty" as many times as possible. State of the State at 3 p.m. today should give more details.

2) Rundown of moneys collected so far in various races. Analysis from AthPo and a bit from JMac, but no one answers what we really want to know: Did Heidi pay her $5 too?

3) State program is designed to help parents figure out ways their kids can go to college, but capitalization is weird. Is it an acronym? Is it supposed to make me think of the thing ABC was doing online for a while?

4) 40 people have applied to head up ADDA.

5) Holy fuck. The Madison County Commission Chairman makes $68K a year?! Group in the county isn't so big on the change in governmental form that's being proposed, thinks it'll cost more money while not achieving its goals.

6) University System would like its own, bigger version of the UGA Real Estate Foundation, so that smaller schools would be able to get stuff built by issuing bonds, etc. Note:

The state rarely pays for projects needed to handle growing enrollment such as residence halls, parking facilities and student centers and pays for other capital projects on a very limited basis, Bowes said.

Gosh. That makes sense. I mean, if there's anything they should be paying for... Also, the three things discussed at yesterday's Regents meeting all passed.

7) ABH knows what it's doing in devoting more space--this time in an editorial--to PETA, and yet it can't stop.

8) Shipp suggests some career possibilities for Newt.

9) Letters: Bertis Downs thinks the newspaper is a meanie. I, too, think the editorial page has been too hard on the school system here, or at least not nuanced enough. On the other hand, it's making people write letters. And we all know Jim is willing to change his mind. SBA administrator says it was totally within the rules for businesses a thousand miles from New York to benefit from STAR loans because economic activity across the country suffered. In the fast-food restaurant field? Jim Ponsoldt writes his monthly letter, referring to this article, and saying that far from planning directors knowing what their job is, they should, in fact, go beyond what they're supposed to do. This letter says UGA is part of the problem when it comes to local poverty and isn't counting the jobs it outsources through temp agencies in its average wages figures. UGA fans urinate in public too.

10) Law School has some diversity.

11) UGA submits three possible architects for Tate 2 to Regents for approval.

12) R&B is, of course, on board with the student Regent idea, with some proposals and modifications of their own.

13) 41 will be in town in a few months.

[bugmenot ABH]

Here is a quote from one of the things that's been going on in Las Vegas lately.

“oh god,” hyperventillates [sic] the guy to my left.

You would think it belongs to this, but instead it belongs to this. Teleporting I might hyperventilate over (though chances are even that would be scaled back to a high five), but chips? Not unless they taste like heaven.

Enmeshed in Jasper Fforde's Lost in a Good Book, his second Thursday Next mystery novel, to the extent that I actually went a stop past where I should have gotten off the bus yesterday and had to walk a good ways. Anyway, heroine Thursday goes to visit Granny Next, and here is their dialogue (while playing ping-pong):

"I got mixed up with some oddness in my youth and the long and short of it is that I can't shuffle off this mortal coil until I have read the ten most boring classics."

I looked into her bright eyes. She wasn't kidding.

"How far have you got?" I replied, returning another ball that flew wide.

"Well, that's the trouble, isn't it?" she replied, serving again. "I read what I think is the dullest book on God's own earth, finish the last page, go to sleep with a smile on my face and wake up the following morning feeling better than ever!"

"Have you tried Edmund Spenser's Faerie Queene?" I asked. "Six volumes of boring Spenserian stanza, the only saving grace of which is that he didn't write the twelve volumes he had planned."

"Read them all," replied Gran. "And his other poems, too, just in case."

To which I direct an adamant "Hey now" because people can't talk trash about my boy Ed and get away with it so easily. He's not boring. There is plenty of sex and violence and stunningly beautiful language and loads of allegory. Oh. Wait. Maybe it's that last one.

This week, we have reviews of local kid Nick Light and MJB. Plus a hacked up Grub Notes I'm not linking to.

While there is something to be said for succinctness, when it comes to the police blotter, we have a weakness for the lengthy tale, e.g.,

Arrests: On Dec. 31, deputy Brad Williams was on patrol near Wal-Mart about 2:40 a.m. when he heard a dispatch that employees at the store needed help with a shoplifter, who had stolen a camouflage jacket. When he arrived, the manager told Williams that the suspects had left in a black pickup and Williams recalled that as he was turning off Epps Bridge Road, he observed such a truck. He then went after and stopped the pickup after it crossed the county line into Clarke County. Williams saw four people in the pickup, so he waited until Sgt. James Hale arrived as backup. The driver, Paul Hull, exited the pickup and began acting nervous. A passenger, Corbett Willingham, 32, of Pauldoe Street, Athens, then exited and Williams asked if he had been to Wal-Mart and the man replied, "Hell no." Williams said everything was on video and Willingham said the jacket belonged to him. Willingham was taken back to Wal-Mart, where he was identified by employees as the shoplifter. The pickup was searched and Hale discovered some crack cocaine under a seat where another passenger was seated. Dedrick Griffeth, 33, of Halen Street, Athens, was arrested of possession of cocaine. Wal-Mart employees explained that Willingham was observed taking the jacket off a rack in sporting goods and putting it on. When he tried to leave the store, an employee stopped him and asked him to pay for the jacket before leaving. He became hostile, shouted, and made an aggressive motion before leaving the store.

Miss Manners merely suggests dropping hints. Maybe this dude could use a copy.

Arrest: On Jan. 7, deputy R.W. Elder was dispatched to a fight on Old Madison Highway, where two neighbors were fighting on a front porch. When Elder arrived, he said Benjamin Luther, 39, was holding Charles Michael Johnson, 46, down on the ground. Luther was bleeding from the head. Elder handcuffed Johnson and an ambulance arrived to treat Luther. A family member at the home of Luther explained that they had gotten home from eating supper and Johnson came over. Luther told Johnson, who had been drinking, that it was time for him to leave, but on the front porch a shoving match started and Johnson pulled out a knife and stabbed Luther in the head. Johnson was taken to jail on charges of aggravated assault and making terroristic threats.

The rest is here.

Then the good ones can have a chance.

Seriously, if Desperate Housewives screws over Gilmore Girls (you know, theoretically, just in case the Emmy people were thinking about tossing the Palladinos a bone), I may have to take matters into my own hands and keep Teri Hatcher prisoner in my basement, feeding her on a steady diet of marshmallow fluff and chicken fingers. [via]

1) General Assembly kicks off, and fast. ABH runs down what's being gotten through already, including voter ID modifications (AthPo has some analysis), this 65% in-the-classroom funding thing for schools (they have more here), eminent domain restrictions, and sucking up to Perdue/voters with the natural gas tax reduction. Enjoy your spicy chicken burrito (maybe even two!), voters. Taylor is smartly putting forth a plan to expand PeachCare for kids whose families are slightly above the income limits for the program.

Taylor said the estimated cost for PeachKids in the first year would be $12 million but could cost up to $100 million in following years.

Now where could we get $12 million....

House Bill 970 reduces the sales tax on propane and natural gas from 4 percent to 2 percent, creating $15 million to $20 million in tax relief, said state Rep. Jay Roberts, the Ocilla Republican who sponsored the bill.

AJC says Dems have raises for teachers and smaller class sizes on their agenda. ABH adds "reducing paperwork for teachers" and "vague support for open government and economic development." The University System's top priorities are full formula funding, faculty and staff salary increases, and money for repairs and new buildings. Morris reporters quote Kemp as saying "The quicker we can get out of here, the less damage we can do," which is obviously a joke but one that slanders his own party. Hellooo. Y'all are in charge.

2) And then there's this nonsense about redistricting at the state level, which could derail Athens's tiny, tiny influence for the good. Kidd not happy and expresses it quite clearly:

"There's a part of me that thinks it's a compliment because obviously Brian (Kemp) doesn't think his brother-in-law, Bill Cowsert, can win" with the current district, Kidd said. "I'm not sure that the people of Clarke County are going to be happy being jerked around."

Republicans are framing it as "Athens needs more than one state senator," which is smartish but not fooling anyone. JMac takes it on at length.

3) Equilibrium. Teen pregnancy rate among African Americans in Athens falling; teen pregnancy rate among Caucasians in Athens rising. They're very close now. Both are around the state average, which is (no shocker here) higher than the national average. Note:

Meanwhile, changing attitudes toward teen pregnancy, cuts in state funding and changes in state rules have continued to shrink programs designed to reduce teen pregnancy.

State cuts forced the Clarke County Health Department to eliminate the jobs of two health educators, one assigned to each of the county's two high schools, for example, Simmons said.

State budget cuts also ended the district's widely copied BART (Behavior and Risk for Teens) surveys, which were used to identify what risky behaviors teens engage in from county to county, said Louis Kudon, director of the health district's Community Health Assessment and Evaluation program.

Next year, the Clarke County Health Department's teen pregnancy programs will lose another $80,000 in funding, thanks to a change in state rules for a program called the Indigent Care Trust Fund, Burnett told the Clarke County Health Board.

I mean, if you want to reduce poverty, the best thing to do is create more babies, right?

4) If Barrow County's going to build its massive jail, it needs Winder to annex the land, but article doesn't explain consequences of annexation.

5) Yay for Radar Multimedia and Keep Athens-Clarke County Beautiful. These ads are great (if ineffective). Also, fancy bus shelter competition is open.

6) Adams is all over the NCAA conference discussions about athletics. Says he doesn't like corporate logos on university jerseys, but admits he wussed.

7) Regents meeting. Will vote on whether to fund UGA golf course upgrades, bio-digester for Vet Med (which is what most of the article covers, in excruciating detail), add AB in Chinese language and literature.

8) You're a gaping mud hole. R&B covers draining of pond at intramural fields, though there's no guarantee it'll make wet dogs smell good once it's fixed.

9) Loran repeats urban legend/apocryphal tale to illustrate how he doesn't like farm subsidies.

10) ABH calls bullshit on 65-percent solution, says funding is needed. Like me, only minus the expletives and a bit more elegant. My favorite part is the bit about how it was "popularized by Patrick Byrne, CEO of Web-based retailer Overstock.com." Oh, I see, now. Overstock.com. Which isn't yet making a profit, I believe. Yeah. We should listen to that guy.

11) R&B updates us on the possibility of a student member on the Board of Regents. Note:

Public university and university system boards in at least half the 50 states include students, said Richard Novak, executive director of the Center for Public Trusteeship and Governance at the Association of Governing Boards of Universities and Colleges, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution reported in a Dec. 23 article. Some are voting members of the board; others are ex-officio.

Or they could just pool their money and write a fat check to Perdue's reelection fund.

12) R&B reports on poverty task force, quotes Pat Allen as saying, essentially, that awareness is 9/10 of the issue:

Like the response to Hurricane Katrina, Allen said he believes that since the poverty issues are now public, the University and the Athens communities will unite to eradicate local poverty.

“Once our community is fully aware of the problem and the cost of poverty on the community, people will come; people will rally,” Allen said.

Fuck! When did we fix poverty in New Orleans? Was that over the break when I didn't have access to the webbernets? Sidebar: Dodson totally hearts the mayor. And speaking of those icky poor people, apparently West Virginia fans include some.

13) Letters: This one on TCE emissions near Coile is kinda hyper. And the last one in the R&B warns that if you get arrested for drinking on campus, you might get ass-raped. Deterrent indeed. (If you're looking for some real kinky action, how about a big-ass locomotive. No really.)

14) R&B doesn't like early action admission because it only considers GPA and test scores rather than extracurriculars and an essay. Huh?

15) Perhaps the most poignant thing we've read yet about Music Midtown's cancellation:

Stoney Schaffer, a senior from Stone Mountain, was upset about the festival’s discontinuance, even though he said he was urinated on three times when he attended the event three years ago.

“It pisses me off because Music Midtown is pretty awesome,” Schaffer said of the festival’s cancellation this year. “I still had a good time even though I got peed on.”

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

Perhaps slightly later than you would have liked, but a graph was promised, and a graph is being delivered. Does it reveal any trends? Other than a possible midsummer exhaustion with the idea of panties, not so much.

At last count, we hit 47 mentions (including a couple of wire stories and one dramatic typo) in 2005. Most authors only appeared once in the list, but Sanneh, Kuczynski, and Wilgoren all appeared twice (the latter due to two BTK killer pieces that ran on subsequent days), and Manohla Dargis, movie critic, won the prize with four separate appearances. This one remains my favorite of the year. The 2006 count will start shortly.

Note: Panty-watch is a regular feature here dedicated to tracking appearances of the word "panties" or "panty" in the New York Times, partially because it's amusing to see the Gray Lady venturing into such areas and partially to see if it correlates with anything specific.

Added: I neglected to give the long view previously. Here it is, in bar graph form. (Sources are here and here.)

Sometimes I want to marry Frontline. This big ol' documentary thing they started showing last night and are continuing tonight and tomorrow, i.e., Country Boys, is the latest reason. And, if you do have broadband but don't have cable or PBS or didn't watch it and have a couple of hours to kill, you can watch the whole thing online. Only part one is up so far, but the others will be. PBS, you are teh hottness.

Anyway, it is the sort of large-scale documentary that most other networks don't show. The picture they're using to sell it is kind of deceptive, as is the cornball text above it. But the thing itself allows these two kids to stretch out and be weird and display their quirks. There's enough to where they seem used to the camera. And it's not condescending. The only narration is their own, mostly Chris's. Mr. Brown and I were talking about this hopefully kickstarted discussion on poverty in Athens last night and how this relates. He mentioned that a film like this actually reinforces a lot of conservatives' ideas about why the poor are poor, and I suppose that's true, but it makes me think about how a work ethic is not an inborn thing. It's something that gets developed in you by your parents or guardian or schooling, and it's not easy to sink the foundations of it deep. Anxiety and frustration result from not doing your schoolwork, but what do you do about that? It's easy sometimes to talk bigger than you really think you're capable of, and then trying to accomplish what you said you would feels impossible, especially when you're not receiving assistance of the kind you need (i.e., why does no one tell Chris how to lay out a newspaper or what they mean when they ask him how much copy he has?). Cody is a different situation, more of a provocateur (read: smartass). Both are feeling their way, and both are both smarter and dumber than they think they are. It also seems important that they're boys, though this aspect doesn't get explicitly highlighted at all.

Could I maybe borrow your mind-reading ray gun some time? I could stand to go to Vegas one of these days.

1) Meet your new cronies, erm, Regents. Apparently, getting to set policy for the entire University System of Georgia is as easy as writing a check for a grand.

The regents, unlike some appointed bodies, are not required to have bipartisan balance or a quota of one political party versus another, said Charles Bullock, political science professor at the University of Georgia and an expert on Southern politics.

The result, combined with Georgia governors now being able to serve two terms, allows regents membership to shift toward the party that holds the governor's office, Bullock said.

Regents appointees are "more often an honorific thing" so it comes as no surprise if they have contributed to a governor's campaign, he said.

"They (the appointments) are something of a reward for 'being my friend or supporting my campaign,' " Bullock said.

On the other hand, 33 ain't bad. Is the paper sure that isn't a typo for, say, 63? And is any of it sinking in? Nope. We love our $2 off the gas bill. And graphs. Graphs are awesome. Did you hear the Harvest is coming? Better prepare for the Master. Also: push? pull? Same diff.

2) Eastside wins battle of Brookwoods. Pizza deliveries to go to correct addresses now.

3) Larning = teh good. So what are the chances for these kids if their parents can't read?

4) Here is the stuff that Northeast Georgia wants from the General Assembly. And here is the assessment of how things are going to go there, with a prediction that some surplus will go to schools, less because it's the law (Perdue's acting like it's a favor) and more because it scores points. You can learn how a bill becomes a law here, if you didn't know. Jane Kidd continues to say things we like ("University staff) have suffered those same two percent (wage) increases and 12 percent increases in health insurance (costs)").

5) Why is Jefferson getting a transportation grant to renovate its historic courthouse? Because grant writing people are smart.

6) Jackson County School Superintendent Byers retiring; tenure marked by a lot of hoo-ha over nothing. Soundtrack? Lindsay Lohan's "Rumors."

7) Those folks who were obsessed with keeping the students out of their neighborhoods due to excessive trash, noise, etc. seem to be quiet lately. Or just directing their attention elsewhere. AthPo has its own analysis.

8) "A lot of people feel that there on the farms in the middle of the country and the law shouldn't apply to them the same as in the city." Well, sometimes yes, and sometimes no.

9) Garbage under, garbage over?

10) So, Ellerbe down, but Gant up?

11) Opinions: Poverty task force acknowledgment, vague "yay" (?), spouting that "nothing is [read: should be] off the table" in terms of solutions. Right on! Like this solution proposed some years ago. Winders expresses automatic eye-roll sentiments many of us felt (raising a hand here) but hopes things go well with the task force. Maybe it's because I've heard this theorizing about which is the dominant species many a time from my mom, but I do find Jim's column provoked by the raging (and thoroughly ignored here) debate in the letters over creationism to be a nice way of defusing things. Shipp doesn't want the topic of so many of his columns to be out of the running quite yet. ABH thinks environmental cleanup funds should go to environmental clean-up, but is maybe a bit lenient in reasoning:

In other words, while raiding the funds might present a short-term solution to the state's general revenue needs, such raids are likely to increase the eventual cost of toxic waste clean-ups around the state.

12) You want more on feral hogs? You got it.

13) R&B just back from break, hasn't coordinated ledes with content of articles yet. For all the shit we give Adams, expressing his love for Wilson's and bowties earns him a minor high-five.

14) Second-best picture of Achim ever (next to the one with Chaka Khan), but best idea for a commercial ever.

15) And, despite my lack of showing up, Mr. Rusk's shindig was quite the hit, according to JMac and AthPo.

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

Not that you were asking yourself that, but if you were: it could have this choreography.

If there is one of the Sunday a.m. shows Team Brown makes kind of an effort to catch, it is This Week on ABC with Stephanopoulos. There tends to be less yelling, and they do a great weekly death montage. But oooh, George Will. George Will is not the worst of the worst. He doesn't tend to raise his voice, and occasionally he even takes a stand we can agree with. But there are times (and this past week, interviewing Mr. General Motors, was one of them) when he makes us understand the whole concept behind those communist reeducation camps where the elite were sent to roughen their hands toiling in the vast potato fields. Really, we're not into that generally. It reeks of vengeance, and vengeance is not cool. But there is a tickling deep in the soul (that arises when one hears him ask why he should pay for the retired auto workers' pensions and health care rather than getting a free satellite radio) that wants to see Mr. Will decked out in some fetchingly mud-bedecked gauchos, hoeing like there's no tomorrow. (You can watch the clip for now at the link.)

The thing that continues to fascinate about David Denby's New Yorker piece on James Agee isn't the writing. It's the photograph by Helen Levitt. Agee is someone I'm only marginally familiar with, mostly for those one-line capsule movie reviews that put down with amazing style, but, wow. He's purty. Here it is on the cover of one of his books. He's half-standing behind a door, so it doesn't really cut off anything besides the door. You know, genius writer blabbity-blibbity, but there's a Capote factor here too.

The reason for the title of this entry is this sentence of Denby's, which literally provoked one:

Agee’s stepfather paid his tuition and sent him a check now and then, but at Harvard, then still a place for the wealthy and the wellborn, he was one of the poorer boys.

Then, eh?

1) Hostel: "That movie's rough" was the comment as we were heading toward the theater, but so, a) it still managed to attract a really large crowd at 5:30 on a Friday, and b) eh, I've seen worse. Not that it doesn't feature people's fingers being cut off and more, plus two really gross vomiting scenes, but it seems to have been cut to hell by the MPAA to get the R. The Japanese films it references (most strongly, Suicide Club) are considerably bloodier, better lit, and less willing to cut away (editing-wise [snerk]). It's weaker than Cabin Fever on the whole, though, with a plot that's not as tight, and it skimps as it goes along on what Roth is absolutely awesome at--namely, writing believable and funny dialogue for the kids. It was discussed outside post-movie that what he needs to do at some point is a straight-up teen gross-out comedy, because he's better at that stuff than he is at the horror. I mean, we'll see when the director's cut comes out how scary it is, but he can't quite do what Tarantino can, which is to make you feel, viscerally, the violence of what is happening onscreen. You just don't completely buy it, and this leads to lack of fear. It's very entertaining in parts, it may somewhat be the concept that's lacking, and it's better than almost all horror films that get released, but he can do better.

2) Kicking & Screaming (2005): Well. Now we know what the superior movie with this title is. Was not expecting great things here. Perhaps some mildly amusing balls jokes and some weird kids. There are a few (including Beans, who's growing up). But mostly, it was just lazy and crappy. I may have been cranky at the time, but I kinda thought it was the suck.

3) Sky High: This, on the other hand, totally ruled. Quick, efficient, funny, full of good teenaged actors, well-written and -directed, and made fine use of special effects. Yes, there is some predictability to the plot, but they also get obligatory things (e.g., the "I was wrong for acting the way I did" speech) over with as fast as possible. I know you're thinking Disney = lame, but, dude, not in this case. Also full of excellent supporting players; it is heartwarming as fuck to see Kevin McDonald and Dave Foley together again and funny. Metacritic blurbs get it about right for the most part, though it could be rated higher. I'd say it was one of the better-executed films of the past year.

4) Happy Endings: It does what Don Roos does well, which is to take a bunch of complicated situations full of lonely people and mash them together, and also to bring out what is funny about these things and these people. Occasionally a little cute with its device of splitscreen and text on one side providing exposition, but mostly successful. Plus it has my boy Jesse Bradford. Am also thinking that, fine, yes, will have to see 24 Hour Party People because Coogan is fantastic onscreen. Hard to say whether he or Kudrow is better, but they are both painfully good. To me, it feels as though their characters contain much more than we are shown, and that is rarer than it should be.

5) Drake and Josh Go Hollywood: Mostly stupid, occasionally cute in the way the TV show is--that is, when they're not afraid to be silly. Josh Peck may be slimming down and earringed up, but he does fine comedy, especially for being only 19. Very old-school.

Robyn + Annie* (orphan, not chewing gum) = Amy Diamond, who is:

1) Swedish (nuh duhs, kidz)
2) About 13? But looks even younger
3) Adorably buck-toothed
4) Ass-kicking

She has real strength in her voice and a tone that is not American Idol-y (it's more old-timey musical, lets-put-on-a-show-and-sing-our-butts-off), and the songs are teen-pop sugar but more interesting than many in that category (which is admittedly not despised in these parts). Also, she has amazing back-up dancers on "Welcome to the City" (video here), who could practically be on a Bjork set and have the word "city" across their asses and generally result in a demented Pippi Longstocking vibe.

Let's really decide to go with Bjork here. That tone is the same tone in "It's Oh So Quiet." i.e., it is just slightly frosted with a bit of Scandinavian-ness.

*Eep. Am now seeing she actually does a version of "Tomorrow."

1) ABH roars about firing of State Ethics Commission executive secretary (read: director), due to desire to go in "a new direction," a.k.a. one that's the opposite of wherever Sonny's standing. It's more suggestive than super-fiery, but it's warming up.

2) Chevron on Hawthorne also receives a gas gouging fine.

3) UGA asks the dome for money for new pharmacy building, which would be nice and all, but is maybe a tetch less pressing than actually funding education in the state (sidebar: state Supremes have cleared the way for the lawsuit on that; letter points out error in education funding formula).

4) "The first man who called said he had a buzzard that is really friendly that shows up at his house and he feeds it."

5) More on yer anti-poverty task force, in which Blake thinks it automatically means Heidi's running for office again and in which task force itself invites others to join:

Members of the steering committee said their work would focus largely on understanding the challenges facing poor Athenians, such as broken families, low wages and difficulties finding health care and transportation.

6) Boo ya! Madison County commission deals with reality, raises taxes.

7) Damn it, Dannell.

8) JMac has a fairly long post talking about blogs and Athens and impact.

[bugmenot ABH]

Have been working on Now & Then/Here & There instead, in an attempt to reduce the pile of things borrowed from other folks (which has already spilled onto the floor, rather than maintaining its proper place on top of the TV). It is mucho odd, Team Brown still being relatively new to this whole watching anime thing. That is, the characters are definitely cute and not dark-looking, with big eyes and simple faces, but the content is in the opposite direction. Unlike Inuyasha, this really doesn't have comedy. It's more about life under an insane totalitarian dictator and the way of looking at that is through the eyes of someone thrown into a completely different world, so exposition is slow. There's a lot of torture and shooting people, and it's disturbing in the way I imagine that Smurfs-bombing video was if you weren't distracted by their being generally hated cartoon characters. So we're maybe halfway through. Mr. Brown has pointed out how often it just uses a still shot of a scene, which is equal parts style and money-saving device. Also, it is a bit slow at times.

Am trying to come up with intelligent way of giving the finger in webbernets form. Unsuccessful so far.

Analogy that compares what is denigrated (pop that pleases because it doesn't challenge) to article itself (article that pleases because it doesn't challenge but repeats same-old same-old)? That'll do for now.

Also, please to note the best-selling albums of 2004 in the United States:

1 . CONFESSIONS - Usher
2 . SPEAKERBOXXX/THE LOVE BELOW - OutKast
3 . CLOSER - Josh Groban
4 . THE DIARY OF ALICIA KEYS - Alicia Keys
5 . FEELS LIKE HOME - Norah Jones
6 . FALLEN - Evanescence
7 . SHOCK'N Y'ALL - Toby Keith
8 . IN THE ZONE - Britney Spears
9 . THE VERY BEST OF SHERYL CROW - Sheryl Crow
10 . WHEN THE SUN GOES DOWN - Kenny Chesney

Profound as fuck compared to this year's eh?

Wantcha a new take on lists? Louis-boy's got it for you, with his "All That Glitters," an examination of the economics of literary prize-giving and how the financial and elect dimensions are necessary to perpetuate the aesthetic one.

English [this is someone's name, not a reference to the language or the academic department] interprets the rise of the prize as part of the “struggle for power to produce value, which means power to confer value on that which does not intrinsically possess it.” In an information, or “symbolic,” economy, in other words, the goods themselves are physically worthless: they are mere print on a page or code on a disk. What makes them valuable is the recognition that they are valuable. This recognition is not automatic and intuitive; it has to be constructed. A work of art has to circulate through a sub-economy of exchange operated by a large and growing class of middlemen: publishers, curators, producers, publicists, philanthropists, foundation officers, critics, professors, and so on. The prize system, with its own cadre of career administrators and judges, is one of the ways in which value gets “added on” to a work. Of course, we like to think that the recognition of artistic excellence is intuitive. We don’t like to think of cultural value as something that requires middlemen—people who are not artists themselves—in order to emerge. We prefer to believe that truly good literature or music or film announces itself. Which is another reason that we need prizes: so that we can insist that we don’t really need them.

A really nice example of Menand doing his essay thing in which he seems to be thinking through something as he writes about it.

And then there is Roger Angell's intro Talk of the Town piece on sports fandom's changing nature in the next issue, an odd choice to lead off. I love the guy, but good-ol-days sentiments like this are a little dangerous:

Sports news abounds, with the talk shows easily outnumbering the games actually being played, but what’s missing still is the crazy, cozy old sense of identification that once tied the fan by the set or in the stands to the young athletes out on the field. The attachment was steady until a couple of decades ago, and what did it in wasn’t so much salaries or steroids or free agency as the astoundingly changed dimensions and reflexes of the modern player. Professional athletes once looked like somebody we knew, that friendly young fellow down the block who could run fast and dunk the ball or throw it a mile—not us exactly but close enough, and there in the games to represent if not always our town or our college then our species. This illusion waned when everyday N.B.A. players grew to six feet eight or better and N.F.L. linemen suddenly averaged two hundred and ninety pounds and could run forty yards in under six seconds.

1) Not all of us are pushing a century in years, meaning we can't remember when athletes looked like the dude next door (David Eckstein excepted). Yet sports fandom doesn't really seem to be lesser among my age peers, so far as I can judge.

2) When you hit this territory (and not that I think Angell's going in this direction at all), it can't help but bring to mind specifically why things were different prior to, oh, let's say 1947.

3) I don't think the idea of identification in physical terms with who's on the field has much to do with being a sports fan. I sure know I can't do what Shaun Alexander does. It's possible this has something to do with my being a girl and a relatively unathletic one, but I doubt it. Kickers, maybe the one position in football that everyone thinks he/she could play, don't exactly come in for more love from the fans for being more identifiable with--more like the opposite. If anything, the increasing recognition that we can't do what our professional athletes do leads to greater fandom, due to their ensuing pedestal-ship.

Stylus covers TV. Is late to the party. (Or maybe we should say "early," better to indicate lameness in the world of youth.)

1) Nothin' like someone's house blowing up to make you feel good about your own craphole in comparison.

2) There's about to be a what? (Task Force.) So. Yeah. It's nice and all that someone's making an effort to address the problem of persistent poverty in ACC, but

Partners for a Prosperous Athens plans to meet monthly and hopes to have a plan of action in place in one to two years, according to Jones.

Hear that, poor people? You will have a plan. At some point. (Ath Po has similarly mixed feelings and more insight on the members of the task force.)

3) McCarter will serve out the rest of his term, then not run again in 08. Seems to be largely because of timing and financial issues, which makes sense.

McCarter, 68, said he has no plans to run for a third term.

"I have no inclination to run for another term," he said. "Am I going to change my mind? Highly unlikely."

To which we might point out that it's, uh, happened before (as Ath Po does too). (Also that "inclination" is a mighty fine word choice.)

4) Enviro folks put out another report on how to make Athens greener and more affordable housingy. Biodiesels come up; also inclusionary zoning.

5) Before the Board of Health writes a polite letter to Nakanishi (that can result in no consequences whatsoever if not listened to) requesting that they stop releasing this chemical they're going to stop releasing at some point anyway, they've decided to do another study on whether or not enough of the chemical is even there to harm anyone (not that there are really standards on carcinogenic amounts). Subtleties! Woo!

6) "My biggest realization and epiphany of 2005 was quite simplistic." Oh the truth in uncaught errors.

7) ABH opines on state funding of education (i.e., suckage) by way of new Honors policy.

[bugmenot ABH]

a nice velvet elvis 200.00 his birthday comming up jan 8

swing and chairs they match 100.00 or best offer

O please o please tell me "they match" applies to what I think it does.

The Onion AV Club lists the best of the worst, praising (sorta) many an item I appreciate, from MTV's True Life to Con Air to LFO's "Summer Girls" to AFV. But then why do they have to damn many of these inclusions with the "worst" label at all? True Life, for example, is one of the best documentary shows on TV bar none, and not just in its documenting of stupidity. The episode "I'm Broke" was genuinely sympathetic with those it covered, taking a clear look at poverty in America in a way I sure as fuck don't see 20/20 doing. Other things (e.g., They Live) I simply don't see as generally characterized as bad. Maybe it's the people I know.

Also. Note to self: Remember to rent Mindhunters.

The musings on Krystal yesterday reminded me of some things Team Brown was tossing around over the break. Mostly whether anyone orders just one Krystal. It is clear that there are some people out there (Zig) who don't know that there is such a thing as a "Sackful" (as a defined entity; namely, twelve), but the thought of anyone ordering only one brought to mind Chris Rock's single-rib request. How much does a single Krystal even cost? Somewhere between 50 cents and a dollar, it would seem. Even the obligatory google journalism turns up nothing (except wanton negativity). Tales are requested.

I am generally not likely to take the long shot (except when I have to, due to team loyalty that will not be modified to reflect reality), and I certainly wasn't last night. At 11:30 or so, I decided, "eh, the chances of this turning out to be exciting, especially in the way I would prefer it to, are not high. Therefore, sleep is a better option." Also, both defenses looked exhausted, due to having had to spend more than two seconds on the field. The moral of the story is that I was both wrong and pleasantly surprised this a.m.; and if you're gonna be the former, the latter is a pretty nice outcome.

This is in the Ace Hardware on North Highland. They're very, erm, relaxed in there. There was also a cat sleeping in a Fritos flat-box behind the counter, but it was not documented.


And this is by Toco Hill on Christmas day. Reggie's Wigs was not, unsurprisingly, open for business at the time.

And a new tagline for the blog?

Mr. Hay understands them. I don't know why the writer of this story doesn't.

Me? I'll take my gin and tonic in a shallow bowl, please, bartender.

I found a baby pigeon the night of the downtown Athens Christmas Parade. Now that it's gotten bigger I need to find a home for it. Does anyone out there know of anyone who keeps pigeons (NOT TO EAT) who would want another one? It's too tame to just be re-released downtown.

You know, like that old saying about having your pigeon and eating it too. Not that.

1) We're starting to get the reports from the four committees UGA put together to tell it how to save on energy costs: Use less energy, for example. Not that employees leaving on lights doesn't add up, but it's not quite at the same level as leaving every light in Sanford on. Maybe they should have a chat with Carl Jordan.

2) East Georgia Red Cross seems to be doing fine.

3) Commission meeting uneventful. There is conflict over what kind of bridge to build and tabling of the issue until their own advisor on environmental issues can weigh in; also, a new bus stop (the one across from the Arch that's been planned) is approved, the state is reprimanded, Baxter improvement continuation is passed, and Kinman is the new pro tem.

4) Madison County would rather nickel and dime its own employees and raid its emergency fund than not lower millage rates again.

5) Honors classes won't give the kids extra GPA points any more next year. Does HOPE not reweight this stuff before granting the scholarship?

6) Practicality v. hysteria. This is impressive, though:

Keen's bill will also call for lifetime monitoring of the most dangerous offenders through satellite-aided devices once they leave prison. The state would not pay for the technology, though - under Keen's measure, the released convicts would foot the expense themselves.

I mean, why are we paying for food for these people? Isn't that where this argument is ultimately going?

7) ABH talks about the homeless, does its usual "public-private is teh bomb" thing.

With a retrospection now admittedly measured in just days, it's beginning to seem as if 2005 was the year the existing model for providing services to the homeless, with its reliance on the vagaries of government funding, fell apart locally.

You know what's less reliable than government funding? Hoping that someone, anyone will pick up the fucking slack because you don't want to pay taxes.

8) Shipp writes about Georgia's population growth as the biggest uncovered story of the past year, previews upcoming state issues.

9) Mikey Adams and WVU prez are all "We totally rule!"

[bugmenot ABH; bugmenot AJC]

Harassment: On Dec. 22, a resident of Moreland Drive reported that another woman called her and harassed her about their daughters having a fight on a church bus. The other woman explained she just called to find out why the other girl was bullying her daughter and that this woman became upset and threatened to kick her rear end.

Eh... it was a church bus. See if you can pick out the key word choice in the next entry.

Arrest: On Dec. 23, deputy R.W. Elder received a report of a vehicle in a man's yard off U.S. Highway 441 in Farmington. The resident observed a vehicle go into his yard at a high speed, hit a pasture fence and then drive around on the property. The alarmed man shouted for the man to stop, but the driver then started arguing with him, at which point the homeowner informed him that he had already called the law and he was going to be arrested. The driver starting cursing, pushed the man and they started fighting. The man told the law that he tried his best not to injure the agitated man as they struggled. When Elder arrived, he saw that the homeowner had the man, identified as WIlliam Allen Powers, 20, pinned to the ground. Elder attempted to handcuff Powers, but Powers grabbed the cuffs. As Elder and Powers struggled, Elder told deputy Tim Kirkham to taser the man. Kirkham deployed the taser into Powers' back. Powers was then subdued and placed in the back of a patrol car, where he began cursing and shouting on the way to jail. During the ride, Powers began banging on the glass, so Elder pulled his patrol unit over and Sgt. Byron Smith also stopped. They again tried to restrain Powers, at which point he kicked Smith, who pulled out his taser and zapped him. By the time Elder arrived at the jail, the jailers were waiting with a restraining chair. Powers was strapped in the chair and because the deputies believed he was under the influence of a drug, he was taken to an Athens hospital for observation. Powers, of Rose Creek Drive, Watkinsville, was charged with trespassing, damage to property and obstruction.

And again?

Arrest: On Dec. 26, security at Wal-Mart observed a man load three 12-packs of beer into a buggy, then go out of the store without paying. Tommy A. Wells, 25, of Ferriday, La., was arrested for shoplifting and taken to the county jail, where he cursed at Sgt. Dominic Hunsinger, who put Wells in a full nelson wrestling hold. Deputies tried to put him in a cell, but he grabbed the door and wouldn't go in. Deputy Jason Lowe pulled out his taser and zapped Wells for about five seconds and he stopped resisting. Wells was charged additionally with obstruction.

Ectoplasm?

Damage: On Dec. 26, a woman on Beverly Drive reported that a substance that looked like Jell-O had been thrown on her house by an unknown vandal.

Also, this one is beautifully low-key:

Dispute: On Dec. 28, deputy M.E. Taylor was dispatched to a home on North Burson Avenue in Bogart, where a man complained that two teenagers had knocked holes in the wall of his mobile home and he wanted Taylor to arrest both. The teens were not there, so Taylor left, but returned when she learned the teens had returned. They gave a different account as to what happened.

All the rest here.

One of the things I like about Al's top albums list is how different it is from most others out there. Another thing I like is the inclusion of Chain Letter. And apparently, I was wrong about the year on Petra Haden's album, because I'd known it was 2005, it would have gone pretty high in my own list.

And I'm enjoying Gardner's set of lists, which reminds us all of the beauty of Jack White kicking major verbal ass.

Team Brown also purchased that Wolf Parade CD that made a bunch of top-number lists. I might slightly prefer the sounds of Mr. Brown singing the songs on it to the songs themselves, but, nonetheless, hat tipped to the indie world.

Self-service fast-food ordering.

Now if they can just figure out a way to have the burgers cooked in India.

So this was apparently jokey and such. But what about Slate's take on same?

People aren't forwarding this video because it's a parody of what's bad about rap; they're sending it around because it's an ode to what can be great about it. Instead of auguring a new day for SNL, maybe it points up what's missing in mainstream rap—an awareness that it's OK to be goofy. Who needs Biz Markie and Tone-Loc? We've got Samberg and Parns.

And yet, he's clearly aware of the existence of, e.g., Luda, maybe even ODB.

It's hard to think of a Top 40 hip-hop track that's similarly playful.

1. Like, uh, "My Humps"? "Gold Digger"? Both of which remain in the top ten or close?

2. Playfulness isn't just a function of lyrics. You can, believe it or not, have a song that's thoroughly playful in terms of its production.

I like the song too, but people should still watch they step.

Laura Miller's profile of Philip Pullman in the New Yorker is too short (the first piece post-Talk of the Town almost always is), and it's hard for me to say how effective it is as a description of the books if you haven't read them (not to mention that much is given away), but she does dig into his ideology pretty well:

In his speech, Pullman contended that the literary School of Morals is inherently ambiguous, dynamic, and democratic: a “conversation.” Opposed to this ideal is “theocracy,” which he defined as encompassing everything from Khomeini’s Iran to explicitly atheistic states such as Stalin’s Soviet Union. He listed some characteristics of such states—among them, “a scripture whose word is inerrant,” a priesthood whose authority “tends to concentrate in the hands of elderly men,” and “a secret police force with the powers of an Inquisition.” Theocracies, he said, demonstrate “the tendency of human beings to gather power to themselves in the name of something that may not be questioned.”

This impulse toward theocracy, he announced at the end of his speech, “will defeat the School of Morals in the end.” He sounded oddly cheerful making this prediction; in his books, Pullman enjoys striking a tone of melancholy resolve. He continued, “But that doesn’t mean we should give up and surrender. . . . I think we should act as if. I think we should read books, and tell children stories, and take them to the theatre, and learn poems, and play music, as if it would make a difference. . . . We should act as if the universe were listening to us and responding. We should act as if life were going to win. . . . That’s what I think they do, in the School of Morals. And Miss Goddard’s portrait hangs on the classroom wall.”

There is more too, as the piece (for once) is online: e.g., an understanding of the fact that Pullman exaggerates for effect in his public pronouncements; also of what it is about "theocracy" that bothers him (it has more to do with storytelling than is first apparent). I still think we disagree on Milton, but that's the case with a lot of people.

What was left out of the last one:

--Some people think the parking meters downtown are deliberately set to run fast.
--Arcade's police chief is pissed at the state court solicitor's deciding not to prosecute the cockfighting ring his men busted up.
--The BC still considering exempting seniors from property taxes, just a lot more slowly.
--Webbernets (TM 12/31/05 Hassiotis) is something the politicos should pay attention to, even in Athens.
--Richard Lane does not overuse the word "charming."
--This is what in the hell those fliers in the mail about Bulldawg Traditions at such-and-such church were about. Please note: Eminem impersonations = true meaning of Christmas.
--Will UGA's new arrest-happy policy deter students from drinking? Eh, on campus. Maybe. If they're lucky. What it will do is make them more creative.
--No one else was vaguely creeped out by the Bible op-ed?
--ABH picks top newsmakers in arts, business, sports, and general.
--Clarke Tax Assessor has a new website.
--UGA students and day laborers have more in common than you might think.
--ABH mentions some problems with the possibility of a student Regent: namely, 1) the Regents serve 7-year terms, and 2) it requires time commitment within the year as well as across them. But don't the regular Regents have jobs?
--Bo-Bo update.
--The thing with Ivey is that it's always a lot more complicated and tangled than you think it's gonna be.
--Loran likes bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens.
--Also, focusing on reading would be kind of embarrassing. (Here's an insulting letter to boot!) (And another one that calls Adams a hypocrite. Eh...)
--EPD puts a kink in ARMC's plans for vacant lot.
--ABH thinks Watkinsville's doing a good job in planning for growth.
--Letter-writer provides another example of Perdue meddling in USG.
--Madison County needs a remedial math course.
--What them trains are carrying to campus

[bugmenot ABH]

The shortened version. We're going to pretend it was just a long weekend. Not the full vacay.

1) Commission: AthPo has anonymous source reporting McCarter not to retire from commission after all? I believe I finally understand the mixed feelings of the comedy-writing community in '00 and '04. Or are the gods just trying to make me run? (No. The gods know I have a) more than enough on my plate, and b) zippo chance in hell. I can't even grow nice grass on my lawn. How could I get elected on the Eastside?)

2) Athens: When this article says, "some ecumenical groups are studying how they might step in to help the homeless - at least through winter," it might add, "but without changing their policies or offering overnight accommodations or whatnot." Let me reemphasize that this is why relying on private charity to get shit done on a decently large scale doesn't work. Because people have their individual zoning difficulties or insurance policies that aren't flexible. It's not that they don't want to help, but it's harder. ABH reviews the local stuff over the past year. And here's the business section on same, in fact one of the most informative and revealing wrap-ups around.

3) Crime: Trotter gets three years probation for hit and run that sounds very much like both parties were stupid. Fair enough.

4) Out of town: Teeny papers in Danielsville and Comer close. Sure, they can get their news from CNN, but not the date of the Miss Forestry pageant. Make your own clever joke about a big wheel (or go for the obvious weenie roast one).

5) State: State legislature has been diverting moneys supposedly devoted to environmental clean-up to its general fund. The response is hopefulness that they'll stop doing so. Do we get as far as even mild outrage? Apparently not. Here's your sort of general depressingness about how those running for statewide office (mostly Taylor and Cox, but Kemp is briefly mentioned) will push certain issues in the new General Assembly session in order to get elected. (Mistah Jones thinks all this market-testing makes for boring politics.) General contractors will be required to have licenses for such after July 1, 2007. Grandfathering is acceptable but not for the best in all situations.

6) Opinion/columns: Loran wonders. ABH is curious what its influence in the community is as measured by what happened in areas it identified as needing attention in 05, and picks new ones for 06, including education (lazy brown folk don't value schoolin'!), TDR program (make everyone happy!), limiting the right to address one's elected officials in public, and not fucking up downtown (on which they get a high five). ABH comprehends need for diversity on Oconee County Planning Commission far more than they did wrt the local IDA. Dick Yarbrough likes the occasional public employee.

7) Letters: The legendary crazy file sees the light of day.

More as it comes?

[bugmenot is broken at this time]

Us peeps who like the local politics had a mass email exchange thing pre-holidays and came up with a list of things that were good and bad and the like in Athens this past year. It's up at AthensWorld. Please to note that when it says, "Other voters liked District Attorney Ken Mauldin," that doesn't mean that other voters actually liked Mauldin. They just liked voting for him. A Hitler/Man of the Year kind of thing.

As far as the journalistic stuff is concerned, I'm still not entirely on board with picking the opinion columnists. Mr. Shearer, as pretty much ever, gets my vote in that category because he's superlatively clear and pretty much captures the whole appeal of following local politics (e.g., things like water rights both will directly affect your life and contain their own little telenovelas) in nearly every piece he writes.

And then here is the stuff from Flagpole, both the different 10 best songs list (organized around a new principle) and some selections in the best sounds of 2005 piece.

And then there is the knowledge, newly acquired through experience, that XLR8 post-brew(s) and Beam and champagne is not (repeat: not) a good idea. Worst of 06? This early? Maybe so.

Less than usual during holiday time, due to pressingness of proofing giant manuscript on learning disabilities (the fun never ended).

1) Once Upon a Time in Mexico: Ah, the Xmasness of Johnny Depp staggering around with no eyes. Light, enjoyable, fluid like most of Rodriguez's stuff; plot is perhaps lacking in key dimensions (comprehensibility being one), but hey, how picky are you gonna get? And Depp is mighty fine. I'm not a fan of his without reservations (or sometimes even a fan at all), but he works it well here, esp with the Brando impression that comes and goes.

2) Gilmore Girls, season 5: Was the screen flipped off at the end of the season, yet again? It was. Damn you, Palladinos. Still think Rory's Yale friends are a bunch of jackasses and that (as commentary reveals) the attempt to use them to show the good side of having money is unsuccessful. Feel much sympathy for Marty. Luke remains bestness.

3) Night of the Living Dead: I know. For the first time ever. Has both highs and lows, the latter being in that it's very slow-paced in long chunks, the former being that it looks fantastic in the snazzy restored print DVD edition and that Duane Jones makes quite a great leading man, even if, erm, things don't turn out all hunky-dunky. Also, as established, apparently sometimes I like the zombie movies with a social conscience, occasionally even better than the ones without it. Not scary so much as it is atmospheric. Can see the comparison to Carnival of Souls, but prefer this strongly. Also, it seems obvious in retrospect, but characteristics of zombies on film quite clearly based on Karloff's Frankenstein's monster (grunting noises, staggering and stiff-legged gait).

4) Breathless: See above. Godard is hard to know what to expect with. I like a lot of the early stuff like this, but he is pretty deliberately frustrating much of the time too. It works well in this because it's short and they're cute. There isn't enough time to sustain aggravation at anything in it. Nearly nothing happens but two kids playing around with each other, and that is well captured. One could easily believe, if not for the ending, that Belmondo's character is imagining himself as a gangster/criminal, and he plays the part on two levels that way. Seberg's voice skirts Jean Stapleton range, but without tipping into it too often. I can see why it's a big deal and why it captured imaginations of filmmakers and young folk and so on at the time.

5) Curb Your Enthusiasm, season 4: Maybe not as inspired as season 3, but still chockful of the genius and the comedy and suchlike. It was also further established that Larry David is my mom. And vice versa.

6) Coal Miner's Daughter: Bio-pics can be loose like this, rather than structured around one moment from someone's life that is increased vastly in significance to provide some kind of story scaffolding. And they can work that way. Though perhaps it's only because of the performances, which are indeed amazing, and maybe that's all you need for a successful biopic. After all, Walk the Line does that selection thing, and it works too. This just feels a little more organic; i.e., I didn't know where it was going. Also: Beverly D'Angelo can act. Who knew?

Halloo. Halloo. There will be stuff appearing here again. For now, content yourselves with this brief excerpt from the epilogue to Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer, which was indeed consumed over the break. It seems all apt and shit this very, very early morning.

I always feel a mixture of misery and relief at the end of football season. Like a boozer thrown in the tank for a forced dry-out, I miss the elixir even as I know that it does me good to go without. There is, after all, the not insignificant matter of having a life, of earning enough money to buy food and shelter, of doing all the things necessary, in other words, to keep myself alive until next season. Pro teams continue to play for a few weeks after the college season ends, which helps ease the craving; but to mix addiction metaphors, the NFL for me serves as a kind of methadone; it's football even though I don't exactly care who wins--the drug without the high.