Antidisingenuousmentarianism

Do Taco Bells up north provide a pitcher of iced tea near the register for their customers who perhaps do want a beverage but are not so much into the 18 frightening flavors of Mountain Dew residing on the soda machine? Or is it a Southern thing? Or, possibly, a "my Taco Bell" thing?

One among many things the ABH blogs have blessed us with: the past of Dr. York.

Try to maintain faith in your vote mattering now, bitches. Supreme Court is cool with redistricting any time for any reason. Middle of the year. Middle of the night. Middle of the actual election day.

Athens Tech has wanted its nursing, biotech, etc. facility for a while, but couldn't get funding. So you're saying UGA should try to attract some kind of giant company that manufactures English papers to get some cash?

ABH catches up to Mesmerization Eclipse on the WUOG story, only without the valuable input of Mr. Brian Crews.

Are you allowed to make jokes about your occupation when you file your running papers? Or is Ed Vaughn wandering around the streets of Athens with a meat cleaver?

Navy School plans due to see light early 2007.

ABH is nervous about what the grand jury's gonna find.

The Athens-Clarke Heritage Foundation writes in to talk about how it's sad that all this KA controversy was necessary for people to notice the historic nature of the neighborhood where they want to move. They also think UGA should take responsibility for helping to find a solution.

Nice coverage of the Athens comedy scene.

In some ways, the immediate reaction here is mild surprise that it doesn't happen more often.

2006 is all about ass.

I also got around to reading the Bourdain interview on Salon from a few days ago. And it is interesting too. In many ways, he comes off as such a strutting, preening thing, intent on yelling at those who disagree with him. But, damn it, we often agree. And he knows what he's doing, too. He is too mean to Rachel Ray (who ever considered the Food Network truly about chef-driven cuisine?), but he is also right that, bamming and all, Emeril deserves more respect. And he is mean to vegans. I know some, and they're lovely people, but again I see where he's coming from. And then there is this:

Q. You also suggest that the relentless focus on safety and sanitation in kitchens is a bad thing. Why?

A. I think fear of dirt is often indistinguishable from the fear of unnamed dirty people. There's something kind of racist about it, about people who are hesitant to try street food in another country. [The food] is part and parcel of culture; it's an expression of identity.

And I think the notion that the government or somebody owes you absolute safety and security in everything you eat is a destructive one, with cheese being the easiest example. With cheese having to be pasteurized or aged to a certain degree, none of us will ever experience a real brie, or how good that used to be. There are laws that you have to sign a release, or at least read a warning statement, before you eat a rare burger. I think we've slipped over into the twilight zone here. Does McDonald's really have to label their coffee cups to say "Danger: Will cause burning if poured on genitals"?

I think it's destructive to quality, and pleasure, and tradition. So I'm skeptical, to say the least, if not hostile to that kind of thinking.

Note that middle one. Read Buford again. Then read some of the review of the new Timothy Leary biography. It contains this:

The only things Leary was serious about were pleasure and renown. He underwent no fundamental transformation when he left the academic world for the counterculture. He liked women, he liked being the center of attention, and he liked to get high. He simply changed the means of intoxication.

And later this:

Even then, he seems to have been blessed with an incapacity for shame, a gift for which he had many occasions to be thankful.

So he comes off as a complete asshole. This raises the question: Is hedonism an acceptable philosophy as long as one is blessed with some sense of shame? I think that may be what's necessary to temper it a bit.

Bill Buford enters the world of the pastry chef, through a very strange door. Part of what is so great about this series of articles is how fast they seem to be coming lately. Usually McPhee'll hit you up with one maybe every six months or so, but Buford's been on a tear. Please try to deal with the fucked up lowercase r's in the pdf version. Excerpt:

I’d sought out Goldfarb because I wanted to learn about dessert. I now recognize that going to him as a tutor was akin to learning how to drive by hanging around a Nascar racetrack. My interests were pretty basic. I didn’t know why dessert was invented or what function in the running of a human organism it was meant to perform. (I wasn’t even sure when it was invented. Raising livestock, vegetable farming, the harvesting of grains: these activities are ancient, older than history, and essential to the survival of the species. But when did humankind decide that it also needed crème brûlée?) For instance, I eat a tuna sandwich and an apple, and I understand, more or less, what they give my body. But what do I get out of a piece of Key-lime pie? Desserts are a problem. You’re a person who eats them and regrets that you did; or you’re one who never eats them; or you eat them and know enough to eat only a little; or else you eat them and eat them until you’re done in. That’s me. Face to face with a dessert, my judgment goes walkabout. I devour it with unreflecting dispatch, indifferent to its qualities or its composition or the skill of its making, jabbering away, jiggling in my seat, metabolism spinning at maximum revs, sweat beading up inexplicably on my forehead, wondering (while looking out
for another helping) how anything could possibly be bad when it manifestly makes you feel so good. And then—betraying an undiagnosed intolerance for milky things, or doughy things, or sugar itself, or just for eating too much—I wake in the night, sick, thinking, How could I possibly have been so stupid to do this again? Dessert frightens me.

This is the paragraph of the article, not the stuff that's provoking a minor hoo-ha about fact-checking. Buford is a sensualist, but he manages not to write about food like he wants to fuck it. It's not a substitute for anything else. It's pleasure in itself.* How he can reconcile his own take on dessert with Goldfarb's, which at least seems to be stepping back from the precipice of provocateurship, is not quite addressed head on, but the militarism (almost) of pastry chefs is discussed.

*And this is also why his articles are exactly about food, second commenter on the link aside. He does address the surrounding restaurant atmosphere and the need to do things right, but the eating is what it's all in service of.

Or excruciation. Whichever you go in for, the next Browncast is up for download.

You know, you kind of have to feel sorry for this guy. Or would, if not for the final twist:

Arrest: On June 25, Lt. Rex Matthews drove up on a wreck on Malcom Bridge Road involving a Ford F-150 pulling a trailer hauling a motorgrader. The truck was in the ditch. Deputy Brad Williams also responded to the wreck, where he smelled alcohol on the driver, identified as Ronald Lee Kelley, 26, of Colbert. Kelley, who had slurred speech and bloodshot eyes, said "I wrecked," the report said. He said he was moving the motorgrader, valued at $38,000, for "All About Asphalt," but when the owner of the business was contacted, he said nobody had permission to move it, the report said. When the deputies asked Kelley to do roadside alcohol tests, he complained that he had to defecate, the report said. He was arrested and placed in the patrol car, where the deputies realized he had defecated in his pants. At the jail, Kelley said he was only joking and trying to pull a prank on the owner by hiding the equipment, the report said. A Danielsville man, who was with Kelley at the time, but had left the scene of the wreck, also was questioned, but has not been charged.

Quiet week. Rest here.

Both Mary Jessica and Robert get in on the act. They apparently like dogs. Also, people hate some Tofu Baby. I get the feeling Flagpole is running it as a joke by this point, hence the cover shout-out last ish.

Some explanation in City Pages (scroll) of how other places have handled partner benefits and what Mark Taylor's current strategy is.

Nuwaubians referred to as "quasi-religious." What's quasi about it? Deputies will testify. Some people seem to think the grand jury is overstepping.

Money for nothing. Land for free.

He might be a reject, but maybe if they hire him at more than they were willing to pay him last time he was rejected, he'll be better for the job.

More qualifiers for local offices, including Andy, the monitor-movingest candidate for mayor.

Retirees suing over health insurance. Normally, I'd be immediately on their side, what with the frequent wiggling out of commitments to their former employees by companies, but the article makes it sound as though they retired after the change went into effect, so they weren't quite as screwed by it as they might've been. Also, they're still getting free HMO coverage, just not free PPO. Anything to change my mind?

Wouldn't gaining "notoriety" for your cuisine be interpreted in a negative light, generally?

Parents should do, um, something about their kids drinking in college. What, exactly, isn't too clear, except that they shouldn't let them end up like Lewis Fish.

Hmm. Soloski news. He might be paranoid, but he might also be right. That is, people do tend to get very petty on this campus sometimes.

All nostalgia all the time.

Don't trivialize Tara Baker's murder, but feel free to trivialize plenty of others. It seems pretty likely the show won't provide any new evidence, but tabloid TV is tabloid TV and it will do what it will. Would I pissed if it were my daughter? Yes, I would be, but it's not, and I couldn't stop it if it were.

Shipp likes the mud.

See? Pride is a major factor in the fire station thing.

Times nine minimum.

1) Deadwood, season 1: Ah, all you cocksuckers who love it are right. It's a phenomenally good show, carefully put together in every detail. The language is poetic and lovely in its rhythms (the phrase "your repast awaits your mouth" is becoming synonymous with "chow time" in the Brown household). The acting is incredible. There's nobody bad on the show. Much as I love Kristen Bell (and I do), she kind of gets shown up in her two episode span. It is about lawlessness, but it's really about civilization and the way it gets established on the fringes. If you fall in the street (and it's easy to do so), no eyes will be batted and no hands extended. But there are small bits of courtesy that stick out strangely ("get some fucking fruit and whatnot"). The multitude of different accents adds to things rather than detracting, reinforcing the mutt nature of the town. And oh my lord, William "Larry" Sanderson! Team Brown is quite in love, to the extent that Vision Video's having rented disc 4 when that was the one we needed next prompted us signing back up for the devil's deal, the MVP program at Hollywood Video, just because we needed to get the next one that bad. It's equal parts heart and cruelty (as well as reality and artifice), and it gets at why Westerns are great in creating that mix. I had thought it was less based on historical events than it is, but none of that is even important. Bestness.

2) Quadrophenia: Jared's comparison is The 400 Blows (running around being stupid, sea), which is good. But there's also something in it of any movie that tries to capture a time about 15 years back. You might not know exactly when it was made while watching it, but you know it's not quite contemporary. Distinction between mods and rockers pretty thoroughly lost by this point though. What I can grasp is that the rockers ride cooler bikes and wear leather jackets. The mods ride bikes with more mirrors and army jackets and chant "we are the mods" (a helpful marker). They fight because they are both young and foolish. Really, one feels kind of bad for the nice people who just wanted to go to the beach, but it's still better than Tommy (the movie, not the album).

3) Superman Returns: He's a little chunky (or at least the suit makes him look so) and I remain loyal to the charms of Tom Welling, but not crappy. More than that, actually good. Too long by a bit, but well-acted, very pretty, with nice little humor bits (dog cannibalism! underpaying suggested donations at museums!). Also, flying is easier to pull off than web swinging, as the sense of weight isn't so necessary, and that's the thing they don't have down quite yet (and, therefore, the thing that bugs me about the Spidey movies). Big early set piece is marvelous. Superman remains untarnished.

Busy week, y'all.

1) Grub Notes goes to Cali N Tito's and The Globe.

2) Reviews of Ya Boy Brell, 1000 Gramz, and the new compilation of drinkin' songs on the Bearfoot Hookers' label.

3) Athfest highlights: Ham1, Murder Beach, Dexter Romweber.

4) And 300 more words on the subject of Danielson. They don't involve "get fucked Johnny come latelies" anywhere.

Mine are in that they always need to be reading something. Obsessively.

Which is why I saw what it says on the inside of a Payday wrapper these days, after being automatically attracted to the presence of text:

Candy is a treat. Please consume in moderation.

Sure, right now it's shiny and small and difficult to read, but how long until you have to show ID bearing your BMI and cholesterol before you can buy a Snickers?

So she, um, is running. Will there be bitchslapping in the commission meetings? Much as it would improve ratings, probably not.

Judge puts a hold on enforcing draconian sex offender law for the eight plaintiffs in the case.

The details of catching geese. No, that's not a euphemism.

The government sometimes giveth.

New Mexico reclassified as Southern state. Well, technically...

Mud!

Athens cops not down with psychics.

Gratuitous slap at the hippety hop music.

ABH provides some clues as to why the county's trying to keep us from learning about all this Nuwaubian bidness.

Letter writer kind of misses that the paper has mocked Adams's efforts.

Treasure Hunters mostly comes off like an inferior Amazing Race, without the sense of pacing and character development those editors have honed and with a host who seems the child of a robot and William Shatner (an attractive robot). But there is currently one reason to watch (apart from yelling "you're all idiots" at the screen), and that reason is The Wild Hanlons. You think you've seen incompetent teams before? Did they take an 80-mile round-trip detour to get a burger when there was a good chance that doing so would get them eliminated? Did they wander around in a mine for eleven hours before managing to figure out the clue? Did they wake up hours late for a challenge? They have this beautiful brand of insane redneck logic, too. Example: You must punch in a code on a box to get your new map. The numbers clearly relate to Mt. Rushmore in some way. It's not too hard to figure out that it has something to do with the number president each face up there was. But no. From their position, they can see two faces, and there are four total up there, so the answer must be 24.

And yet... they're still around. Which you can take as the evil nature of the universe or, more optimistically, its benevolence. If you're an overachiever, it's the triumph of sloth. If you're not, it merely proves how very much you can fuck up and still have a shot as chance takes out the stronger, the smarter, and the harder working. It's oddly inspiring.

Over here is TV. And over here, in a very different part of the room (possibly an entirely separate room) is reality.

Date: June 27, 2006 9:25:49 AM EDT
To: UGA-FORSALE@LISTSERV.UGA.EDU
Subject: Looking for a Dr. Phil-type

Hi: Does anyone know a local family therapist/psychologist/social worker who is a lot like Dr. Phil...you know, someone who diagnoses with clarity and speed, gets to the point and starts treating the symptoms, and gradually uncovers the underlying causes, but who doesn't spend years, and thousands of our dollars, helping to get change accomplished? Need someone effective, direct, and to-the-point. Definitely can't be someone who nods and says yes "I hear what you're saying" for months after months...know what I mean? Money (or lack of money), even with insurance, is a factor. This isn't for me as I'm nearly perfect ;-)))), but for a friend who is going through some difficult relationship issues and would rather not be identified. Please email me off-line if you know of anyone or if you have had first-hand experience that helped to change your life or the life of someone you know. Thanks.

Of course, that is the way I would prefer it, but clearly, sir, you have no idea who I am.

Jukebox 20-whatever is up. There is good stuff in it (Paris Hilton, Death Cab). I just mostly wrote about lesser tunes, and even among those, I must not've been very on.

Unblurbed:

Rohff - Starfuckeuze (France)
It’s a five-minute circle, but it almost manages to win my affections anyway because of the complete ridiculousness on display. How much of this is intentional I have no idea (small idea: not much), but it reminds me of many a middle-school attempt at being totally badass.
[4]

Augie March - One Crowded Hour (Australia)
The name at first seemed ill-chosen upon considering the first words of the book (“I am an American, Chicago-born”), but the sentence continues, “and go at things as I have taught myself, free-style, and will make the record in my own way,” which is not so terrible as a description of the attempt, if not quite the result. There is a lot on display here and some of it shimmers, but it’s ultimately lyrical in too conventional a fashion.
[5]

Scritti Politti - The Boom Boom Bap (UK)
The category iTunes is going with is “indie.” The year iTunes lives in is apparently much earlier than we all thought. This is mostly too low-key, but it makes me think fondly of VH1’s Bands Reunited in a way that is more than just nostalgia-driven. What that show does is take someone you thought was merely a novelty act or a one-hit wonder and uncover all the other neat stuff they did. This doesn’t rise to the level of genius even slightly, but it is better than one should expect.
[4]

Gosia Andrzejewicz - Pozwol Zyc (Poland)
“We Will Rock You” lurks in the background, hinting that this is some sort of soccer anthem, but no matter the case, it overcomes its dated production with the lovely sibilants Gosia hisses and something that may be early 70s Who (?).
[5]

Email hillaryhazelbrown@gmail.com for musics.

More details on the vaccine plant.

It's unclear how much tax revenue either government will see from the vaccine plant, at least early on. Oconee County has offered an incentives package of property tax abatements, land, infrastructure and job training valued at more than $25 million, and the state also will offer incentives, but details of the package won't be released until the company makes a decision, which could come in a few weeks, Clark said.

...Companies often will have just one community in mind for a new facility but will choose another finalist to serve as a decoy, sparking a competition resulting in a better incentive package from the community they favored all along, and giving the company a fallback, Page said.

"It's hard to tell whether we're A or B," he said.

So is it worth the risk? It might be. ABH editorial celebrates the fact that it's not out of the realm of possibility to have a biotech corridor. Whoop de doo. That said, it would indeed be wise not to allow it "to become choked with strip malls, fast-food restaurants and similar enterprises." That'll be hard with a bunch of office jobs moving out there.

VA old, forgetful, can't find keys or remember deadlines for Navy School proposals. LRA head gets technical.

Jackson County living in them Gangs of New York days.

Question: Does Oconee County have its own hospital? And shouldn't it, for assisted living to locate there?

Suggestions for actually collecting some fucking taxes in the South, including eliminating bullshit sales tax exemptions that add up to pennies for the individual and loads of lost dollars for the state. Caution advised. None of this is as good as implementing a truly progressive system of taxation, but some of it might be useful.

Foundation giving $2 mill for professorships and scholarships. Of course, a quarter of that's going to one professorial position and another quarter to study abroad, but beggars, choosers, etc.

Julie's thesis is interesting, but I don't think it holds water. Most people who live downtown now don't live there for the music. They live there for the bars. So I'm not sure it changes anything unless it raises property values too high for music venues to operate.

No I in Team, but a bit of cash can be found in compassion. But Athens isn't expanding training capacity for nurses, and with the lowest median salary among state metro areas, I can't imagine it would attract many either. Except the compassionate ones.

Oh, ACC. Do not end up on the same side as the Nuwaubians. This is a really stupid move.

Look out, people who live in the country...

Winders has this impression that other countries don't do hype. They do, dude. They just don't have quite the same stage to do it on.

Jim, fella, we'll achieve victory once we manage to hang another banner.

Blake talks about the economic benefits (small) and costs of this potential giant subdivision and commercial development in the works. This way of generating figures seems a bit odd, though:

In Clarke County, a house must cost $173,000 to generate enough taxes to pay for the services its residents consume, but that figure skyrockets to $1.1 million for a family with two children. The break-even point for the average of 0.75 children per house is about $430,000, according to the study released in April.

Moneys come from more than just property taxes. This is like saying you'd need to purchase x million dollars worth of sale taxable goods to pay for the services you consume. Innit?

Rep. Terry England lives in a world of confusion, where no one can ever predict the consequences of anything.

Cox and Taylor talk edumacation. More money! But not so much talking shit about Perdue's plans.

Shipp points out the irony of Sonny's role in keeping the Voting Rights Act alive.

Old farmers' market up for sale.

Teachers are moving among schools in Athens. Turnover still high. It's a hard fucking job.

Declaration week. If you think Heidi's not running, you didn't see her at the Flagpole Music Awards.

ABH opines that the new fire station should have no frills. I'm of the mind they should give a little more on the details (sometimes people's feelings are important). For example, they could talk about the wastefulness and aesthetic blight the others are.

Letters: Yeah, it's not Vietnam all over again... Stop fucking with judges.

One year, no worse. Karen Russell has another story in the New Yorker, and it is thrilling how good she is. Give it a little bit before you give up on it. Things start off confusing, but they get better, and they reel you in. She has a book coming out. I have this idea it'll be good.

Also, Schjeldahl assesses Picasso about as fairly as one can possibly do in this day and age: as good as Poussin, not much next to Velázquez.

And Anthony Lane is a genius wrapping up his review of Cars.

--Hey, William.

--Yo, what up, Mary.

--I sure am glad I decided to come to the second oldest school in the country.

--Aw, yeah, bitch. Rev. James Blair was da bomb.

Not to laugh, when proofing, at a Mr. Richard Cocke being cited.

1) Eddie Izzard: Unrepeatable: More in that it's improvisational, as it's really not potty-mouthed in particular. Funny, but not as funny as some of his other stuff. Perhaps the draggier he gets, the more the comedy comes out? Or perhaps he's just had about 10 years to polish.

2) Zathura: Really lovely in some ways, especially considering its no doubt limited budget (you can tell at times, what with the keeping the monsters entirely in the dark and the restricted cast), but also aggravating and less than it could have been. If only the two main kids weren't mostly an asshole and a big fucking baby. I do understand that this is the point and that they learn lessons about not being such, but it seems to take forever. And haven't they seen Jumanji? Art design is gorgeous, especially the credits and the game, and I suppose it's worth seeing to hear the one asshole kid say, to a robot, "get me a juicebox, beeyotch."

Is it a coincidence that the articles on Gregg Toland and binocular vision appear in the same issue? No doubt it is, but it's an interesting one. Neither is online. But here is this from the first page of the former:

In the contemporary handheld-camera and reality-TV world, the idea of attaching a sophisticated lens to the process of seeing has become passe; few, given the seemingly universal artlessness that characterizes our news of the world today, have any interest in cinema as a language.

How old are you, dude? Als is always a provocateur, but not usually of the cranky senior citizen sort. Is this not the age of Hype Williams? Of Quentin Tarantino? Of McG? Cinema is a language we all speak so fluently, we hardly even need to talk about it anymore. And what is "the seemingly universal artlessness that characterizes our news of the world today"? A comparison between the beauty of the News on the March sequence of Citizen Kane and the current state of things on 20/20? And if so, what the fuck does that have to do with cinema? Is this a brief polemic against verite? Can one make the insensitive argument that of course the New Yorker's writer on race (and he pretty much is) will both see things in and prefer black and white? What exactly is going on?

Thanks, Athfest. It was real. More here. And explanations.

This one from Ham1's set at Flicker, which I wish we'd been able to catch all of, but we had to hustle out and across town. Next time we'll stay.

Warning: Sound is ridiculously shitty, but not so shitty you can't hear the melody of the song.

Who doesn't love a mystery grab bag? Hence the popularity of America's Got Talent, which Team Brown caught some of last night. I'd just been watching Larry King and Reeg being old guys together (though of different types; one all head shaking and bewildered, and the other hopped up on goofballs), talking about the show, and everything they said was right. What they didn't say is that it takes the central dynamic behind American Idol (i.e., anyone can have a chance, but you, in particular, suck) and pumps it up to greater extremes. There is indeed loads of hope, even if you're a rapping granny or a guy with a dog act. But there is also the joy of sitting at home watching people's hope being crushed, crushinator style. At least they usually let people finish on American Idol. Here, you get the beauty of a woman with a talking bird act (she's been on Animal Planet's talent show and won easily) who is almost immediately buzzed by the Simon substitute. It's like you get multiple chances to fail. But you also get the Hoff looking at you adoringly, with the wonder of a very small child on his face almost constantly; honestly, every five seconds he's on camera is pure TV gold. You get the Randy Jackson factor (the person who's semi-professional) eliminated in favor of Brandy and the Hoff both being Paula. If it only had gay banter between Reeg and English fella, who knows how far this could go.

Generally depressing, but true. Maintaining historic stuff is hard to do when nobody cares enough to put up money. Which is why they should be looking out of town, dudes.

Look, northeastern Clarke County, I know you have an inferiority complex, but if you can save money on your fire station by cutting out the two motherfucking clock towers, I highly suggest you do it. I'm all for knocking down the one in front of the Five Points station too, if that helps. Or they could build it out of dogs. Anyway, the ACC wusses on the issue.

Even without the extras, the fire station will still be larger than other recently built suburban stations, Reddish said.

"It really is an enhanced station," he said.

About a dozen residents turned out to City Hall to demand commissioners not make cuts to plans for the station because of the higher-than-anticipated construction costs.

"It would be a travesty of justice if that fire station doesn't look like all the other fire stations in the Athens-Clarke County area, and doesn't have the same equipment," Hancock Avenue resident Willie H. McBride said.

North Clarke residents threatened to try to derail a 1999 vote on a slate of sales tax-funded projects, and would have again in 2004 if the commission had not made Fire Station No. 9 the top priority. Several residents said Thursday they would never vote for another SPLOST again if the fire station is not built as planned.

I really do get where y'all are coming from. But this is a ridiculous issue to get all huffy over. Get pissed over bus service. Or better roads. Get pissed over governmental dollars that are actually useful. As opposed to those that go for clock towers.

Sometimes, government organization debt is more like personal debt. Those times tend to be when you're small and help poor people.

There is a difference even between laws aimed at college students and laws most likely aimed at Mexican workers. Even if I disagree with both of them.

Why is Bob Smith going to the choo choo forum? To rail against it? (Ba dum bum.)

ABH flexes anti-crime muscles. Stone 'em! Stone 'em!!

Brian Basinger, while writing about a completely different issue, stands up for correct process and the careful composition of law. Lawsuits exist for a reason. And the ABH should know that.

It would've been terrifying if it hadn't made most of us laugh.

The beauty of the editor's note.

R&B reports on other schools with fixed tuition rates for four years and how they handle it. Note, "about 70 percent of undergraduates currently take longer than four years to earn their degree." Presumably, the Regents knew this. So how much do you think they care?

Well, damn, 1800 jobs does sound impressive, but don't put on too much lipstick, Athens. $25 million is a lot of money. Does that include the $14 mill the state's contributing to expand Athens Tech facilities?

Chang might be at Georgia Tech, but he's right that Athens has its own pollution issues.

Chris Hassiotis pretends to be a man of few words.

Still think the voter ID thing's not political?

More state ratios required in education. Red tape sucks, but you don't get rid of it by getting rid of the people who deal with it. (Okay, sometimes you do, but it's not the best strategy.)

Not only a story involving a bush ax, but one that explains what a bush ax is.

I believe the explanation is karma.

Georgia Power and the PSC still fighting.

New comprehensive art school not so much meeting the second part of that phrase. The lesson on all of this, from the fire station to the art school and more, is "hurry the fuck up and build it before copper becomes more valuable than diamonds."

Ex-GMOAn representin'.

Sometimes there are opinion columns printed that might as well go in Overheard in Athens. This is one of them.

Give Ira Edwards more money!

Guessing Tweedledee and Tweedledum here.

Also, thank you, ABH for enabling comments.

Six Feet Under, season 4: I'd sort of forgotten about not being caught up on this show until we finished rewatching all of Buffy (because Buffy is crack rock), and I was looking up Michelle Trachtenberg on the IMDB and noticed, hey, she's in this particular season of this show. I think it adds up to less than previous seasons did, even seasons I didn't like as much. And the last episode is guaranteed to piss you off. It's kind of like a dysfunctional relationship with someone who can be funny and charming occasionally but only manages to behave in a semi-adult way a couple of times a year. I recognize that the hell the characters put you through is something that the show does decently well, but at the same time, couldn't they all stand to chill out a little? Of course, then it would be life and not TV. Still, if there's one thing the writers are amazing at doing, it's determining what the characters watch on TV and what movies they go to see. These are smart people, kind of arty people, and yet they watch Christopher Lowell. Also, can David and Keith just have a fucking baby already?

Date: June 23, 2006 8:34:17 AM EDT
To: UGA-FORSALE@LISTSERV.UGA.EDU
Subject: New Wallets for Sale

These wallets are new and in excellent condition. $5 each.
I have them at work with me today and can send through
campus mail or you can pick up.

...

2. A brand new green and black "Princess Gardner" cowhide
split leather wallet that features: checkbook cover, pen
holder, 4 credit card pockets, I.D. window, zippered
compartment, slide pocket and coin purse on the back with
clutch-snap closure. It measures 7"W x 4"H x 0.75"D.

Sadly, someone snapped it up before I could obtain it for Mr. Linn.

Apparently Jesus wants to fuck me. Is that like a guaranteed in at Heaven?

I did meet Monsignor Elite, who is holding his trophy for audience pick for best video. But I forgot my hat that says "Hillary" at home. Dang.


Dark Meat was interesting. But long. And hippie. Jared says, "If you don't mind long and hippie, then Dark Meat is as good as it gets." They can quote that shit.


And Mr. Bob Hay don't give a fuck. Also, he is demonstrating that his wristband for Athfest held up after a shower. Props to plastic wristbands.

When you think of inherently evil cars, this ain't one that springs to mind.

Theft: On June 14, deputy Laura Teet went to the Cracker Barrel on Epps Bridge Parkway, where a woman said her car was entered and the stereo, valued at $475, and a case of bottled water were stolen. Security tapes showed a PT Cruiser and possible suspects near her car. Sometime later, Teet was sent to Fire Mountain on nearby Dowdy Road, where a car stereo was removed from a car that was forcibly entered. Again tapes showed the PT Cruiser. Teet made photographs and dusted the crime scene for fingerprints.

Slow learner. But still a learner.

Arrest: On June 14, deputy Marvin Williams was dispatched to a call on U.S. Highway 78 near Pete Dickens Road, where a man was having problems with a passenger in his car. Deputy David Gilstrap already had arrived, where the man, William Marty Thomas, 45, of Long Road, Watkinsville, appeared under the influence with bloodshot eyes and unsteady feet. The driver explained that Thomas already had beaten one person up and he was trying to give him a ride home, when he started thrashing about in the car and trying to crawl out the window. The man pulled his car over and called 911 for help. The two deputies had difficulty handling Thomas, who at one point tried to head-butt Williams. During the struggle, Williams pulled out his Taser gun and shocked Thomas. It took four shocks before Thomas would comply and could be placed in the patrol car. At the jail, he continued to struggled with deputies and was threatened with another Taser before he went into a cell. He was charged with disorderly conduct.

But he was a good-humored DUI.

Arrest: On June 18, deputy Brad Williams was patrolling on Experiment Station Road about 12:20 a.m. when his radar showed a Chevy pickup going 71 mph. After stopping the pickup, Williams informed the driver of his speed, and the man replied, "Man that's fast." The man had bloodshot eyes, couldn't keep his balance and laughed when asked to do the one-leg standing test. John Joseph McElhannon, 25, of Great Oak Drive, Athens, was charged with DUI and speeding.

The rest here.

Flagpole goes where the ABH won't, telling us (at the end of Pete's column) exactly how that Republican Party banner was defaced. Huh. More creative and vulgar than I would've thought.

The letters page contains much as well, from two letters defending Rouge to one contending that dogs are not people or immortal beings to one that fails to make a distinction between words and pictures.

City Pages covers historic preservation district downtown debates, Boulevard zoning of a particular corner, how things will go in the giant development area in northeast ACC, watering restrictions, and how low our state taxes are.

Huckaby a pretty relaxed guy.

We love the gays here, but cautiously. Understandably, the ACC is asking for numbers from someone other than the gay rights advocacy group.

Dude. Methico. It's been suggested before.

Oh, Perdue's willing to take on the feds, when the particular feds in question are ones his buddy W isn't pals with. Sitch seems like initial fuck up, but then angry stupid overreaction.

See? Beating up on criminals can bite you in the ass. There is this marvelous quote from Keen:

"It's a shame that when we take steps to protect children from absolutely the worst of our criminal element, that there are those who would want to defend them," said state Rep. Jerry Keen, R-St. Simons Island, the plan's sponsor. "We're going to continue to put the safety of our children above the convenience of convicted sex offenders."

Unfortunately for him, there's also this:

The lead plaintiff in the lawsuit is Wendy Whitaker, a 26-year-old criminal justice student who has been married for six years. According to the complaint, Whitaker was convicted of sodomy when she was 17 after a consensual sex act with a 15-year-old boy on school property.

But he's all "We can't be expected to write the laws carefully, you wusses!"

Sentence of the week in the paper? I'm going for this one: "Stephanie Cartwright received a permit for a business making and selling small decorative buckets at a location on Greensboro Highway."

Now the ABH thinks we should hold off. See, if you're gonna go this way, what you can do is first get everyone an ID, and only then work on laws requiring them to exercise your suffrage. And what is this?

While it's likely many of those people won't have any interest in getting the proper ID for voting, providing an ID to even a small fraction of that number could be a problem for some county voter registration offices across the state.

Where are y'all getting that? Poor people don't want to vote? Old people? People of darker shades? You know, they're the ones who tend to stand in line for long periods of time to be able to do so.

Shipp provides a counterpart to the number of Olympic boosterism stories that have been running lately.

McGinty covered this letter already and well. I do think, though, that maybe the ABH should add "perverted journalism" to its masthead as an advertisement. It would go so nicely with the Savannah's ads.

Ooh. When you read a lot of stuff you don't quite love, you forget what that first blush feels like. Even Preacher, which I ended up adoring, didn't sock it to me straight away from the first few pages. Fables, however, did. Mr. Brown is already no doubt sick of hearing me go on and on about the giant crush I have on the book, but I can't help it. It's lovely (what art!), it's clever as hell (Bigby Wolf --> Big B. Wolf --> Big Bad Wolf), and it really works the story nicely. I can't say that I'm emotionally involved in a deep way yet, but I'm willing to spread some cash around. Also, this means Chris Thorn's batting a thousand.

I betcha D.T. Max got a bag full of poo on his/her doorstep from one Stephen James Joyce after the New Yorker article s/he wrote on big literary man's grandson. The thing is, SJJ has a chip on his shoulder about scholarship, and as he controls all copyrights to the estate and is rather litigious, he can suppress worthwhile publications. And this seems both much like his granddaddy and also opposed to that man's wishes at the same time. At first, it's all, "isn't he amusingly crotchety," which also seems to be how Joyce scholars felt at first, but now it's more crossing into true cootitude.

In our conversations, Stephen spoke proudly about his fights with scholars. “I am not only protecting and preserving the purity of my grandfather’s work but also what remains of the much abused privacy of the Joyce family,” he said. He added, “Every artist’s born right is to have their work . . . reproduced as they want it to be reproduced.” This was particularly important in the case of Joyce, whom he calls Nonno—the Italian word for grandfather. Stephen said that Joyce’s genius could be found in his several books. (His own library of Joyceana, he once told Le Monde, “is less than a metre wide.”) He did not see what the two hundred and sixty-one works of criticism in the catalogue of the Library of Congress, say, could add to this legacy. Academics, he said at one point, are “people who want to brand this great work with their mark. I don’t accept that."

I do get this. Even though I'm semi-academic myself, I'm not necessarily a huge fan of a lot of criticism out there. But I don't want it all to die either. The article is also all overlapping with many issues of our time, especially copyright law, which, kids, I'd kind of recommend you go into.

So that Elite song I was all attempting to tell you about and direct you to? I believe I added about ten words to the title. The single word of which I didn't actually have in mine. Anyway, it's called "Liquor," and it's on his more official MySpace page, along with three other tracks that are pretty tasty as well. Athens finally gets some crunk, bitches!

1) Review of Snowglobe's Oxytocin. Album of the year? Mebbe.
2) Review of Regina Spektor's new one.
3) Box thingie on Zumm Zumm for Athfest

Oh Shit I Saw... Dexter Romweber. Dude really liked the food Five Star provided to the little get-together at Little Kings. Every time I looked up, he was going back for more. I appreciate this love of fine things to eat, but it also can (and in this case, clearly has) result in a gut. Nice pompadour, though. And he was disappointed that there's no smoking in Athens bars.

You for my mom, etc. etc.

Also podcast #7 for actual content tonight, probably, since we have places to be. Thanks, GAPN.

See you at Sprockets.

Here's what's kind of fucked. A lot of other school districts in the surrounding area that have had trouble making AYP are now seemingly able to do it. And we're not talking about Oconee County either. Does it have something to do with the way you can not count certain kids if they're in a small enough population? Or the fact that we have more LD kids? Or what? The requisite op-ed is gentler than usual.

Like the ex-sheriff is gonna give you a positive quote on the current sheriff? And also, we told you that comparison to Richt was a bad idea.

What this article about Watkinsville wanting the drank so they can tax it doesn't explain is how a city and a county can be at odds on liquor regulations. Oconee County is still dry. This seems to be just the city. What's up?

It's a really long way to get the message across, but sometimes the UGA system of requiring bids to avoid corruption isn't always the best way to do things when it makes you go with the lowest bidder. Because sometimes the lowest bidder is someone's cousin Gary.

Not that an Italian proofreader is required at the ABH, but I'm sure "good morning" is googleable easily.

Loran Smith goes to Brooklyn. And back in time...

Impassioned letter on school funding.

Wait. Rental property lowers the value of houses in general? Haven't we heard the opposite of that argument many a time?

Yr. Gov. Now less fat.

This is where Team Brown got engaged. Sorta. I really miss that sign. It turned into another drugstore and then a ritzy grocery store (that was also a good place for the homeless to shoplift) and now it's about to be a Storehouse Furniture. Damn gentrification.

Okay, so the area apparently stretches to Atlanta now, but no matter their current geographical location, Connor Rand & the Red Dirt Band have recorded an amazingly Athenian song in "Alcohol and Adderall." (I hope that link works.) If I weren't so compulsive about studying and completing things, I would've been on the seven-year plan for graduating myself. As is, I merely know people who were. Anyway. It is mighty catchy and also true. And it's gonna be on the first release from Hard Labor Productions.

Jukebox numero 22 is up. With some good stuff. Which is mostly Busta. And everyone is too nice to Carrie Underwood. Her last song might've been cornier in content, but it was better in sound. And also they're really hungry for some summer jams.

If you want it, here it is. Here = hillaryhazelbrown@gmail.com

This is not a real sound effect.


But this was a real guy. With a normally shaped and presumably constituted head.


This is the size of the bag they give you at Tower if you are a giant nerd. The foot is there for context, not for fetishes.

30) I should have expected nothing less. This was Patricia Field, downtown purveyor of cross-gendered chic. In the 80's and 90's, Ms. Field was the doyenne of drag, her boutique on Eighth Street the destination for anyone who was truly serious about neon wigs, heavy-duty fishnet tights and booty boosters, the padded panties that add a womanly curve to otherwise unendowed buttocks. [from "Giving New Meaning to the Changing Room" in Alex Kuczynski's Critical Shopper column, 06/08/06, sadly behind the pay wall now]

31) With time, Harris's tastes for sensation and luxury goods ripened. ''And This Too Shall Pass'' (1997) was a sophisticated romance novel involving a sportswriter (''Sean was relieved that fall and football were approaching''), a predatory TV newswoman (''She had on a burgundy handmade silk brassiere with matching panties'') and a pro quarterback (''Zurich Robinson's pumpernickel-brown face was a shower of sweat''), and Harris enriched the soap-opera drama by giving attention to small-scale emotional realities. [from review of I Say a Little Prayer by E. Lynn Harris, review by Troy Patterson, 06/11/06]

32) Her dress was up around her waist. Her panties were ripped. He could see her blue birthmark below her belly button. There were scratches on her thighs. There was a lot of blood. [first chapter of Don't I Know You, by Karen Shepard, 06/18/06]

33) The text accompanying the video says a man has stolen a pair of women's underwear.

The clip, first posted on video-sharing site YouTube on May 31 and viewed more than 1,500 times over six days, shows a man standing in what appears to be a dimly lit public bathroom, wearing what indeed appears to be panties. As the video plays, the man, shown from the stomach down and thus faceless, begins to fondle himself. [from "Video sites grapple with specter of smut," by Greg Sandoval, for News.com, 06/19/06; note: "appears to be"]

Note: Panty-watch is a regular feature here dedicated to tracking appearances of the word "panties" or "panty" in the New York Times, partially because it's amusing to see the Gray Lady venturing into such areas and partially to see if it correlates with anything specific. The end of the year should result in a few more graphs.

[previously] [bugmenot NYT]

Damn you, Peachtree City.

Fuel go up --> fewer people waste it. Slightly fewer.

All Sec of State candidates agree that there might be a problem where there is no problem. Some have slightly better takes than others. But they're all wusses. Better safe than sorry is generally a good motto, except when it starts infringing on people's suffrage rights. Even Miss Angela, who has bringing major boxing back to Georgia as a campaign plank? Also, Cox is getting plenty o' crap tossed her way. Do note this AJC story on how many registered voters don't have a valid driver's license. That's a big damn number.

Okay, if someone wanted to hit Glenn Richardson with a pie, as long it were thrown gently, I would not object. On the other hand, his douchitude does provide something for me and Jim Thompson to bond over, even if he doesn't know we're doing that.

OMG, haven't y'all noticed how cheap gas is?

According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the average cost of a gallon of regular unleaded gasoline in U.S. cities was $1.41 in April 1981. Excluding federal and state gas taxes, this meant the price was around $1.26. In today's dollars, that would be about $2.83 per gallon. But last month, the before-tax cost of a gallon of unleaded gasoline was just $2.29 - about 19 percent lower than that.

And this month?

Melanie, do you know Chuck?

What to pick out from this story? How about the great press for Dodge?

Capitol Police hold a grudge. Whuzz wrong with a little assault between friends?

Unfaithfully Yours (1984): Compare to the original. Then try to forget the original exists. Because the genius behind My Girl can't quite compete with Sturges. Here's the thing. What's funnier: someone doing physical comedy who's good at it but famous for it (Dudley Moore) or someone doing physical comedy who's quite surprisingly good at it but about whom you had no idea he possessed such talents (Rex Harrison). The remake's also radically simplified, in that there's a lot more time given over to conventional farce misunderstandings (perhaps to provide more motivation for murder, because I suppose we need that in this day and age) and a lot less to bizarre fantasies while conducting (only one this time). It's okay, but it can't hold a candle.

Date: June 19, 2006 10:59:48 AM EDT
To: UGA-FORSALE@LISTSERV.UGA.EDU
Subject: Massage

I'm looking for a place to purchase a gift certificate for a "clean" massage in Athens. I'm not looking for any questionable places where they offer those "extra services". ;) Both Euphoria and Body Wise seem to have gone out of business. At least their phone numbers have been disconnected. Any recommendations?

Because the UGA staff listserv would be the best place to get a hookup for a happy ending...

From Jan Brunvand's The Study of American Folklore (4th ed.), from the chapter on "Folksongs":

Popular songs are also printed or, more often, commercially recorded, and they, too, come from the pens of professional composers, sometimes people who are more businessmen and -women than artists, and sometimes from the performers themselves. Many popular-music artists (especially rock musicians) compose directly on their instruments, often in group sessions, thus participating in something akin to the folk process. Professional pop singers are expected to perform songs more or less as they are written and to pay royalties for their use. Popular songs are generally more stereotyped in form than art songs, tending either to fit a rigid ABA pattern (like that of most older pop standards) or following some other mode (like the AAB twelve-bar blues form and blues diction used for some rock pieces). Most popular songs enjoy only a short but a very intense existence, being enormously popular with a broad, mostly adolescent audience for weeks or at most months and then disappearing from radio and music-video shows. But a few popular songs become identified with the generational members of their eras--songs of World War II, of the '50s, the '60s, etc.--and are replayed as "golden oldies," both by individuals and on the airwaves, beyond the times of their initial popularity.

Jesus, Ira. How hard are you trying not to get reelected? ABH reports stuff about deputies corresponding with Malachi York, trying to convert prisoners to Nuwaubianism, Edwards hiring six Nuwaubian deputies, and the firing of the head of the jail who was looking into all this. He also might have wanted to turn down the $2K campaign contribution from the cult leader, whether or not it bought him any influence. It may not have been clear yet that York was molesting kids, but I'm sure it was clear he was crazy. (Winders does a call out.)

Schools fail to meet AYP standards. I really like the way this is phrased:

The AYP measurement is required by state and federal accountability laws such as the No Child Left Behind law, which mandates that every student in the United States must perform on grade level by 2014.

I'm not sure it's even possible to make it clearer that mandates are generally crap. I can mandate that we all be able to fly by next year, but that won't make it happen. Also, gotta love the option of school choice when every Clarke County middle school failed. Also also, this is without counting the students who change schools a lot, who are probably likely to drag down the curve otherwise.

Whistleblower gets back his old position.

Those poor persecuted Republicans of Clarke County. It's not like they're getting mileage out of this. Nah. They're genuinely hurt and think the Young Democrats got together and did this. Any theories (or knowledge) of what the banner was reconfigured to read? I'm thinking "pubic," which isn't even very creative, though the act itself does seem to have required quite a time commitment.

Oh, so Georgia's FDA is required to comply with the suckiness of the federal FDA.

Dang it. More black and Hispanic students applying to and accepted at UGA. The trick now is to get them to enroll.

Of course the guy from Niceville thinks you're rude.

Funny how "reducing fraud" always ends up screwing the poor. You'd almost think it was code for something. Sister Margarita Martin is so going to heaven.

Um, what? Former marine and current football chaplain is screaming things about crack at a bunch of sweaty boys? Note to self: Remember not to send kid to UGA football camp.

What you can do as lieutenant governor is determined by who's in charge in general, party-wise. So you don't just have to win some of the elections. You apparently have to win damn near all of them. Including the state supreme court ones.

Sometimes you get penalized for not acting like obnoxious jackasses. It's a life lesson you get from sports, among other areas.

Don manages to write an opinion column that's not technically one. Good on yer, Mr. Nelson.

ABH backtracks a bit on their taking the side of the anti-free-speechers. Now it's all "the school board should investigate and in public." When most people, including the paper, didn't seem to care about the ability of Bar-Peled to give his speech, what motivation does the board have to look into things?

Not all of the pieces collected in "Soldiers' Stories" in the New Yorker (you know, the big war-themed one you don't want to read and keep procrastinating about) are in this audio slideshow. I know that because they told me so, not because I've listened to it, so I don't know which ones are and which ones aren't. They are well written. They also occasionally make your stomach contract into a hard little muscle of regret. I figured I already had enough of that on the subject, both before and after reading the article. If your eyes are currently very dry, and you're out of saline solution, you might want to give it a shot.

So, Mr. Brown may have called me retarded for adding Elite as a friend on MySpace, but as soon as he gets his damn act together and provides a way for you to hear his song "I'm Drunk Off My Ass and I Know It" (that last part may be in parentheses), you will hear it blasting out of cars cruising around downtown looking for a parking space for the remainder of this time we call summer, i.e., about four months in this latitude. For now, you can look at his pictures and use your imagination. Or hit the Sprockets show later this week, at which point you get both pictures and sounds combined in this new thing they call a music video.

Maybe this is a reason to be suspicious about buying brand-new houses. And I knew I didn't like realtors.

The Winder Police Department does not have a single officer who speaks Spanish. And they wonder why they're not breaking this case wide open.

Road funding fluctuates.

I guess I understand offering incentives for people who seem to be doing good work to move to places where that work is needed, but what about teachers? Does a principal necessarily always make that much of an impact?

UGA has to plan for a 2 percent budget reduction again. Why?

While the state provided a 4 percent pay hike for UGA employees in its 2007 budget, it fell short in covering rising utility and health care costs, said Budget Director Tim Burgess.

Because if it's good enough in one area of education, it's good enough in all of 'em.

Students are kicking around ideas for Tate II. Biggest one? Not ugly. Of course, no one's really here to provide ideas.

If there is a theme one can pick out of the ABH editorials over the past year or so, that theme is "It's all about appearances... except when it's not." This one on Nash seems to go along with that, especially this bit, "whether or not Nash's apology was a politically motivated attempt to regain the full commission's trust, it was an apology he clearly owed to them, and to the public." Fake apologies. They're better than no apologies at all.

Also there's some love for community-oriented policing.

What happens when you skip a day and, therefore, a particularly nutty letter? Winders takes your joke.

Yes. Yay for more dead people. At least Royston's presumably in the paper's distribution area. Unlike Maryland.

More problems with "fixed for four." Maybe "fixed" refers less to a state of immobility and more to the temporary shutting up about tuition bills for four years, at which point Sonny, if reelected, will be a lame duck, right?

Advice on not being stupid about parking on campus.

These people need money.

What I got out of this article was some heartwarmingness, sure, but also the information that blacks and Mexicans hate each other at Clarke Middle.

Y'all missed a chance to write a headline with the word Fudger in it, ABH. Anyway, redistricting is with the judge, and arguments on both sides (including the clusterfuck one presented by the defense) are summarized.

I'd love to think of this as conspiratorial consolidation of power, but the man has been around ten years.

Saying you won't dignify something with a response usually means you don't have a good response ready. Tommy Craft refuses even to look into the possibility that kids are being made to copy Bible passages in health class at Cedar Shoals.

Your electric bill is going up again, but less than it would've if the PSC hadn't negotiated with Georgia Power, who wanted all your money.

Wonder of wonders: tort reform is bullshit.

Casey Cagle sucks pretty bad too. He's not talking about cutting taxes, but he is talking about cutting state spending.

Cox is going with the "we just want this whole ugly thing to be over" stance on gay marriage. Mark Taylor's approach? Not showing up.

Emory gives money to the choo choo, but calls it "alternate transportation."

Jim's still not big on the idea of a lawsuit being used to settle things, but he's now more on the side of the schools in the school funding case.

Winders loves the gays! I mean, he's all, "Maybe we shouldn't stone them" and "It's possible they're human, too." The gall.

Sometimes I can't even explain why you're funny.

Date: June 16, 2006 9:29:26 AM EDT
To: UGA-FORSALE@LISTSERV.UGA.EDU
Subject: 2006 Yamah Vino Classic Scooter $1600

I am moving so I need to sell my scooter. It is a rassberry 2006 Yamaha Vino Classic (49cc) and I have had it since Novemeber. It is in fantastic condition and I have taken great care of it. It currently has 1100 miles on it. I will also include a winter/armored jacket (Joe Rocket Sm) and two helmets, one black full faced and one silver 3/4, one set of winter gaunlet gloves and one set of light weight gloves. I also have tools to fit the scooter for changing the oils. I still have all of the documentation and the title.

Yeah. I'm still reading 'em.

Darkness lent us the 2-volume Green Lantern/Green Arrow team-ups from the 70s (vol. 1 here, vol. 2 here), which have some neat art in them (creative stuff with text on title pages, especially) and largely manage to overcome their excess of earnestness about social issues. Thing is, one gets darn sick of GL repeating his oath once a day. Every time? We gotta hear the whole thing? Does current GL do this? It's nice in its teaching kids to question authority, and John Stewart is pretty awesome in his whole "fuck whitey" and "I ain't wearin' no mask" attitude. Still, nothing genuinely emotionally involving. More just kinda cute.

Also have read vols. 2 and 3 in hardback of the Bendis Daredevil stuff (apparently his stories start in vol. 2; Kevin Smith wrote vol. 1, which I haven't read). The art kind of drives me crazy, though, not only in how complicated and messy it is, but also in a kind of sloppiness. There are character inconsistencies. I can see one character changing from white to black with the switching of artists, but he also seems to have switched personas with another character. I don't think it's my stupidity, either, but maybe it is. I'm very much trying to pay close attention, though, as I think you have to do with Bendis, with his love of convoluted storylines, time-wise. Sometimes I like this trait and sometimes it's really annoying (e.g., "just tell me what happened when, douche!"). Also, the whole big deal that's made about Daredevil's hair being burned off and how terrible it is? Not quite so believable when it looks better after being torched. I'm thinking that chick had another life as a very daring hair stylist. I prefer some of the other artists to Maleev, but it's hard to tell who's who (whoever does a lot of the White Tiger storyline is pretty good). It did mostly make me think Daredevil's less lame, though he's a bit reliant on grinning satanically, but I'd get more out of it if I had all the background and such.

There must be some out there.

Hi,

My name is Kiera, I am part of the MyLifeofTravel.com project, a free travel blogging platform created for people to record their travel stories, plot routes onto interactive maps, and to share experiences with other travellers.

As travellers ourselves, we built the site to give people a simple way of sharing their stories and visualising their travels with friends and family. The intention is to encourage as many travellers as possible to share their stories and for the website to become a resource for user-generated travel information.
I'm contacting you because, as a keen blogger, I hoped you might be interested in our concept and be willing to give us some feedback on our site. We have spent nearly 2 years developing it and are looking for as much feedback from other bloggers as possible. I realise this is asking a lot and understand completely if you choose not to reply. However, all feedback we receive is greatly appreciated.

We are looking for general feedback about the site concept along with all suggestions about how to improve the site and which features you would like to see added.

Good luck with your blog and enjoy your travels.

Sincerely,
Kiera

Kiera Bailey
My Life of Travel
http://www.mylifeoftravel.com

Keen blogger, eh? I'm thinking that adjective and that noun might go far together.

"The more than a million Disney Channel viewers who watch 'The Suite Life of Zack & Cody' each week..."

Please note also:

In a bit of corporate synergy that only Disney could imagine, Ms. Song trained for "Wendy Wu" under Koichi Sakamoto, executive producer of the channel's "Power Rangers" series, which marries martial arts to science fiction. To accommodate Mr. Sakamoto, who also directed the action sequences of "Wendy," the movie was filmed in New Zealand, as is "Power Rangers."

Funny. They don't promote that quite as much in their tourist material...

Sorry I took the night off last night, y'all. I needed to drink some cider, eat some lasagna, and fall asleep early.

Anyway...

I'm flippin' both Peter Beinert and William Grimes the bird. I don't go around telling people what "liberalism" is all the time, and neither should they. The point of being real about all that shit is feeling comfortable in your own skin with it. Pep talks not necessary, especially ones that talk about how awesome it is to kill people.

And to the state of Alabama, for having license plates (it's slightly better that they're military plates, but still) that read "Global War on Terrorism."

And to Jessica Suarez, for calling Ships, "more cohesive than previous Danielson efforts." Only if you haven't heard previous Danielson efforts.

I may have been cranky yesterday. Hopefully less so today.

Thank you, AJC, for bringing us the serious news about what's going on on the Gulf Coast.


We also learn that it's acceptable to wear giant chunks of diamonds in your ears while doing yard work.


That one can pose gracefully with a lopper.


How to look like you're concerned about the youth of today.


Sexiness plus shovel = increased sexiness.


Usher does his own edging.


Wait. There were cameras there? I di'int even notice.

Oh cut it out, Pete. You're just trying to make us forget about Andy and band together in support of Heidi like the terrified progressives we are.

City Pages tells us McCarter would like to privatize more government functions (perhaps this is connected to his desire to hire fewer people), including leaf and limb collection, and Carl Jordan doesn't want you driving your horseless carriage around downtown, dagnabbit, regardless of whether there's another way to get there at night. Also, local industrialists says it's your fault you're unemployed. Or your school's.

Bear serial monogamy revealed in article about Barney's passing.

The secret to Athens's drop in violent crime? Arresting people. Sounds so simple, don't it?

CCPLC students are getting some daycare. Why? 1) Athens Tech president is chair of that committee within Partners for a Prosperous Athens, and 2) Grant money, yo. Hopefully, UGA will get involved, too.

Madison County catfight winding down. See? The mock can be a force for good.

What happens if it doesn't rain and you dickheads keep watering your lawns at inappropriate times. I see you.

Settlement, shmettlement. School funding suit is going to court.

Op-ed wants us to give the damn Orkin Tract away, even though the company interested has said the squabbling between Oconee and Clarke isn't the reason they haven't decided yet. But it might be, editorial emphasizes. And therefore we should grab ankle for 18 jobs.

Why don't you just marry Ralph, Bill?

Sometimes UGA students stick around, and you never know who's gonna and, of those kids, who'll end up being a successful business owner.

See? This guy wrote in from Maryland to support pictures of dead terrorists on the front page of the paper. That's how important it is we see 'em.

No such thing as a free big ol' cookout.

Arrest: On June 6, a deputy patrolling near Kroger's was flagged down by an employee of the supermarket to alert him to a shoplifting. James William Sheats, 45, of Smith Street, Athens, was walking away from the store when he was arrested. He was seen loading a buggy with four cases of Budweiser, three cases of Bud Light, two packs of Boston Butt meat, two packs of ribeye steaks and a 12-pack of Red Bull drink, then trying to leave without paying.

And these two actions were combined, you imply?

Damage: On June 5, someone damaged three buildings and some vehicles on Commerce Drive by writing remarks and spraying paint. Those businesses marked by the graffiti included Gary West Shutters, Manage Medical Transport and Oconee Foundations Inc.

Somehow, all of this does not seem characteristic of a single perp.

Theft: On June 5, deputy Laura Teet was dispatched to Parkside subdivision, which is under construction about a mile west of Oconee County High School. Trees are being clear and an employee of T&T Timbers of Madison reported someone entered a service truck and spray painted hearts on the tires of a log loader. Stolen were five gallons of hydraulic oil, valued at $50, a 15-gallon a minute fuel pump, valued at $600, and 350 gallons of diesel fuel valued at $770. Someone scratched "Jonathon" on the ground and ATV tracks were found in the area. Teet photographed evidence she found at the scene.

David Gilstrap is not subject to your little flatteries.

Arrest: On June 11, deputy David Gilstrap stopped a car on U.S. Highway 78 and when he asked the driver for his license, the man asked in slurred speech "Hey Baby, how's it going?'' David Elton Bailey, 30, of North Avenue, Athens, was arrested for DUI, driving while his license was suspended and having an open container of alcohol. Two bottles of Mr. Boston vodka were found in the vehicle.

Ladies shopping for bathing suits are already in a foul mood. You don't want to push it, security.

Arrests: On June 9, security at Wal-Mart watched as two women selected swimming suits, then conceal the items in their purses. Outside the Garden Center, security confronted one of the woman who kneed him in the groin, then head butted him in the eye. With help from others, she was brought under control. Katie Moore, 26, of Harve Mathis Road, Athens, and Christina C. Holland, 28, of Bowden were both charged with shoplifting.

The rest here.

1) Grub Notes goes to Blue Willow Inn, Peppino's, muses more on the former than the latter, and how a certain kind of hustle goes with Southern identity these days. Also the food.

2) Review of Sing Song EP by The Little Ones.

3) Hell. I kind of forgot I wrote this big ol' piece on the Sprockets show, but here it is.

Team Brown's Browncast number 6 is up at the GA Podcast Network. Apparently, we're supposed to start titling these things. But there's more of a real theme song this time.

Mr. White seems to be enjoying his Max Fischer phase. Was he, like, smiling and stuff?

Information is power. Or at least slightly less fear sometimes. Getting a reprieve via the Oconee County Commission has to help too.

This is a very interesting case to choose to make your stand on, and you wouldn't think "dude with a bag of illegally copied CDs" is your ideal defendant, but the arguments being presented are intriguing ones.

There are good things and bad things about this plan to create a different kind of alternative school. The bad things are that it sure does come off like prison in training and that it's called the "punitive alternative school." The good is mostly that it might include a leadership development ropes course/rock climbing trip. I'm just not sure if these methods work.

Motherfuckers just can't stop with the breaches of privacy.

Yeah, if you like gangs of old white guys roaming the streets, saying "good morning" to everyone, performing community service.

Ira Edwards writes a column of his own. He can't talk to the media because he's not an egotist. And because he's like Coach Richt (who, interestingly, does have time to do so). And because actions speak louder than words. But sometimes refusing to speak is an action.

Sure to provoke a flurry of other letters. Dude, your humanity is showing.

SMC's getting applause from Winterville. I do sort of understand the thinking behind zero-based budgeting, but doesn't it seem like it would add a lot more time to the process? And isn't time money? And isn't that the reason we do it the way we do it anyway?

But look, when he says,

At the end of the day I think of myself as a pop artist, like Takashi Murakami or Andy Warhol, who sample pop culture and put their twist on it. On the other hand, because I want to be a really credible musician and producer, I have to come with songs that really work, which is hard sometimes.

he makes me think how much Andy Warhol would've dug him. Can't you just see them drinking blueberry daiquiris togther? Anyway, this is all self-conscious and dorky, so of course it's also adorable.

[courtesy where courtesy is due]

Jukebox 21 is up. It is a pretty crap week. The Reni Jusis was my fave. Or maybe the Darkness track. Neither made a huge impression though.

If anything piques your interest (Mr. Hay, for example, had to see what a rapping Dutchman sounds like), it's hillaryhazelbrown@gmail.com.

Someday I'm making my own version of this. Once you click on it, you'll enter your ZIP code and whether you're inside or outside, which information is then cross-referenced with National Weather Service listings to determine the true answer. Of late, in these parts, it would mostly read: as Hell.

Advice of the week: "A 98-pound woman on meth will kick your butt all day long."

To hell with this actual learning stuff. Buckle down and learn how to fill in the bubbles, kids.

Ditto for the safety provided by 911 operators' being able to locate where a cell call was placed from. Counties say, "I'm rich, biatch!"

So from now on, if fraternities and sororities want to move off campus, they have to dance just how the commission wants them to.

A special-use permit means the county commission can decide on a case-by-case basis whether to let Greek organizations move into the county. County officials also could tell the social groups how much parking to provide and how to control such nuisances as noise and light that might disrupt neighbors.

"We will be able to control them well enough without shutting them out completely," planning commissioner and committee chairman Jerry NeSmith said.

Um, don't we have ordinances about noise and light and such?

I'm thinking there's a little mock embedded in Blake's article about reenactors.

Stormwater fees becoming a reality for more counties.

Blah blah biofuels. How about y'all tell me what's to be done about the emerging pie problem, ag commish candidates?

Taylor and Cox talk about job creation. They're both for it. Taylor thinks an educated workforce is an incentive for companies to move here. Do he know his Marx? Are we attracting companies who produce papers on Shakespeare? Are there a lot of those around?

Inspirational bullshit from Darrell Huckaby. Hurricanes never crush the kitten spirit either, but I don't see any columns about that.

Keep an eye on your pennies.

Op-eds say FEMA still sucks and new finance veep is a good choice.

Winders says, "If you don't like gay marriage, you're my grand-dad." I think that's about right. Letter writer leads us around to the view that perhaps the ACC should legalize gay marriage before looking at benefits for same-sex partners.

What in the name of G-d is Jim Thompson talking about? Did this get edited down to nothing? Or did it make little sense to begin with? Stuff changes in 18 years? Mega Shockah!

Bill Shipp points out that not all students who can't make it through UGA in four years are layabout party dudes.

ACC considers increasing program fees for out-of-county residents. And? You live in a county with lower taxes and, therefore, fewer resources, you better suck it up.

Perhaps your decks are too damn expensive.

So you don't think this mystery company is playing us against North Carolina, trying to squeeze whatever tax benefits it can out of both parties?

Holy fuck. The Methodists are back.

Is it really a question of residential versus commercial construction (the proportions of each) in this gynormous ACC proposed development? Or is it more a question of size in general? What are they planning to build there commercially that would be so wonderful? An Eckerd or two? Another Food Lion?

Vote for Sonny to fix redistricting problem. Walter Jones plays top.

Finally, please do note the new blogga feature on the ABH page. Not only do you get a sneak peek at the next day's paper, you also get a chance to interact more directly with both Jim and Jason (and David Bill, but that's a different category). And there are funnies made.

Cars: I do highly recommend going to see this movie at its last showing of the day, when you can have the theater almost entirely to yourself, with no moppets present. This may amplify the impact of your crunching noises and leave you a little zonked the next day if you're an eight-to-fiver, but it's still worth it. So, let it be said that this is even more for Boomers than Nemo was. We had a brief discussion post-movie about whether the kids today even know what Route 66 is. To which I pointed out that it's a clothing line you can buy at Kmart. So the kids from slightly less advantaged backgrounds may know better. There is one rather cheesy music montage that spreads the nostalgia on with a firehose, but dang if it wasn't pretty charming otherwise. And (gulp) made me want to give NASCAR a chance. Maybe that's the true evil of it. But the race sequences are incredibly shiny and fast and shot with a swooping (not really) camera in a way most movies don't make use of anymore. Also, I secretly love cars. I grew up riding in a '77 Chevy Caprice Classic, and that kind of engine sound (not obnoxiously revved, but just gently rumbling) could still put me to sleep in no time. I may not have ever had a driver's license, but I get the allure. On the other hand, it's kind of environmentally irresponsible to make a movie about the joys of cruising (especially after the energy parable that was Monsters, Inc.). On the third hand, it's a fucking kids'/parents' movie and Owen Wilson does a nice job with the voice, and the whole "entirely made of cars, with a few planes and suchlike" world is entertainingly bizarre in a way none of the other Pixar films is because it bears so little of a relationship to reality. Best credits joke ever is also oddly trumped by sudden reminder than Joe Ranft died in an insane car accident last year.

Munro. Your biyearly dose.

She's not getting worse. (<-- litotes)

And, in fact, the statement to the right of it about it being the best of its kind, is perhaps even true. It didn't make me hate soccer more. It did confuse me a little.

Also: does that thing have some sort of primitive genitalia? If so, how is that allowed on TV. Get the frog some pants.

It is too bad that the photograph that accompanies Margaret Talbot's New Yorker article on Oriana Fallaci is not there online too. Because it must be said that she is quite beautiful. And, indeed, the article starts by talking about how she tended to lull her interview subjects into a state of relaxation or at least unapprehensiveness through her pretty face and hair before pouncing. But here is the story we hear so often, yet again, filtered through Talbot's thankfully intelligent take:

In “The Rage and the Pride,” Fallaci portrays the attacks of September 11th as a thunderclap that woke her from a quiet, novel-writing existence and transformed her, almost unwillingly, into an anti-Islamic rebel. But Fallaci’s distaste for Islam goes way back. Reasonable worries about the rise of Muslim fundamentalism were combined with a visceral revulsion and the need for a new enemy, in the post-Fascist, post-Communist world. Her interviews with Yasir Arafat (whom she loathed), Qaddafi (whom she also loathed), and even Muhammad Ali (whom she walked out on, she says, after he belched in her face) all fuelled her antipathy toward the Muslim world. So did her experiences in Beirut during its disintegration, in the nineteen-eighties—the basis for her 1990 novel, “Inshallah.”

Next paragraph:

I started wondering if Fallaci would tolerate any Muslim immigration, or any mosque in Europe, so I asked her these questions by e-mail, and she sent back lengthy replies. “The tolerance level was already surpassed fifteen or twenty years ago,” she wrote, “when the Left let the Muslims disembark on our coasts by the thousands. And it is well known . . . that I do not accept the mendacity of the so-called Moderate Islam. I do not believe that a Good Islam and a Bad Islam exist. Only Islam exists. And Islam is the Koran. And the Koran says what it says. Whatever its version. Of course there are exceptions. Also, considering the mathematical calculation of probabilities, some good Muslims must exist. I mean Muslims who appreciate freedom and democracy and secularism. But, as I say in the ‘Apocalypse,’ . . . good Muslims are few. So tragically few, in fact, that they must go around with bodyguards.” (Here she mentioned Ayaan Hirsi Ali, the Somali-born former member of the Dutch parliament, whom Holland, shamefully, declared last month that it would strip of her citizenship, citing an irregularity in her 1997 asylum application.) She wrote that she found my question about whether she would tolerate any mosques in Europe “insidious” and “offensive,” because it “aims to portray me as the bloodthirsty fanatics, who during the French Revolution beheaded even the statues of the Holy Virgin and of Jesus Christ and the Saints. Or as the equally bloodthirsty fanatics of the Bolshevik Revolution, who burned the icons and executed the clergymen and used the churches as warehouses. Really, no honest person can suggest that my ideas belong to that kind of people. I am known for a life spent in the struggle for freedom, and freedom includes the freedom of religion. But the struggle for freedom does not include the submission to a religion which, like the Muslim religion, wants to annihilate other religions. Which wants to impose its ‘Mein Kampf,’ its Koran, on the whole planet. Which has done so for one thousand and four hundred years. That is, since its birth. Which, unlike any other religion, slaughters and decapitates or enslaves all those who live differently.”

So, first one must recognize that she's working in that hyper-European form of discourse, which, as mentioned here before, involves saying outrageous things partially out of the joy of argument. The French probably do it more than the Italians. Or maybe there are just more prominent French intellectuals.

But here is the thing with Fallaci's argument (if you can call it such; it's not exactly rational), which I jotted down last night on a scrap of paper: How do you define what a people stands for? Through its leaders? Through the majority? Or through something else? It seems ridiculous that someone who fought with the anti-fascist insurgency in Italy during World War II wouldn't recognize the difference among these ways of definition.

On the other hand, her concluding statement, at the very end of the article, is pretty heart-warming.

Good article on how Fourth Street Elementary is trying to improve the lot of its students. Innovative means, good people, hope.

Presence of Kidd, Bob Smith, Becky Vaughn, Mac Rawson, and more does not cause pie fight to break out in Oglethorpe County political meeting that is otherwise old-timey and sweet.

Remember how earlier I was saying how great it was that at least Ira had a spokesperson? Well, he's saying jack-all. Hoschton folks are being equally equivocatory about their arson investigation.

We're thinking he was right to consider that.

Ukelin!

Mr. Pritchett writes in to defend the voting rights of those who don't own a home in the ACC. Just because you can't afford overpriced property doesn't mean you're not committed to living here. And just because you're only here for a limited time doesn't mean you don't have a stake in what happens.

God's really not into you having to keep soldiers in your house either.

Racial harrassing not found in Oconee County Primary School case.

As part of the investigation, Bernknopf interviewed 19 people, including Anderson. Of the 12 current or former black employees interviewed, 10 of them said they did not feel they were treated differently because of their race, nor did they know of anyone making such a claim until Anderson's complaint went public.

Again, I think this whole case arises from a difficult situation, and the resolution that's been come to is probably the correct one, but is 10 out 12 some kind of huge majority?

It seems like the LRA for the Navy School has a lot more power than I would've thought.

Lee talks about why your property value just went up so much: namely, unfunded mandates in the public schools. Peanuts thrown to various school districts listed at end.

No political signs on rocks in the ACC.

So the Republican choices for lieutenant governor are between 1) Jesus and Abramoff or 2) not winning.

Burgess sounds super-enthusiastic to be taking over as UGA sr. veep for finance. And who wouldn't be?

ABH makes it pretty clear they're not endorsing Edwards for sheriff next time around. Also, we learn that if you have a reporter on scene, they might be able to get a quote out of him.

Social Circle's such a friendly place.

Lamar Thomas feels strongly about pans.

And here's another letter arguing for the right to free speech with exceptions, graduation being one of them.

It's been a rollercoaster ride of late. Marit Larsen resurfacing, Camera Obscura doing a little dance, Spank Rock shaking my booty. Snowglobe just swam into view, a la Esther Williams, and stole my heart, though. Team Clermont's blog has a few songs posted. Definitely in Best of 06 contention. There will be a formal review for Flagpole, and it may contain something about how the onslaught of vocals and instruments multitracked in close harmony squeezes the heart with warmth and happiness. This album was made for me. Maybe in a lab somewhere.

The Long Voyage Home: John Ford + John Wayne + Eugene O'Neill + Gregg Toland does not quite add up to as great as it should be. It may be because the story's woven from four different Plays of the Sea. Or because it is completely ridiculous to have Wayne playing a Swede. Or just because it's dated and we don't care about the hard life of the merchant marine much these days. I don't find it cohesive, but it is beautiful. The combination of Ford's simply framed shots, even of two men leaning on a ship's rail, with Toland's sense of light and focus makes for some breathtaking frames (the last one is a killer). To me, what it's mostly about is Wayne's star power, the sort of thing you don't even want to give in to as a modern person. It's always understated when he shows up in beer commercials or even in Preacher, which tend to use the older, gruffer Duke rather than the young man with a loose curl of dark hair falling over his forehead when he gets excitable. This is only a year after Stagecoach, and he's still pretty in a tough way, reminiscent of De Niro in Godfather II with his high-waisted pants, his suspenders, his white shirt, his little cap, and his undeniable presence. It's almost unconnectable with the older version of the same man.

Look, y'all (more examples here, no doubt), I love you, but I'm no less creeped out by your "he deserved to die" talk than I am by the "he deserved to die and I'm thrilled the government did it in the way they did and anyone who doesn't think so is a communist" stuff. I might say people deserve to die sometimes, when I'm in the car and someone's tailgating or if I'm watching the news and get particularly peeved, and I'm not shedding any tears, but the fact is that it is not up to me, and it shouldn't be up to me, even to decide whether something should have happened of this scale. I could talk about how I don't like government-sponsored assassination as a tactic or how it really hasn't worked elsewhere (Israel, yo), but that also is not the point. Good for you for proving your manliness and your patriotism, but killing someone out of respect for human life rarely adds up.

On second thought, maybe this is creepier.

Dear Publishing Executive magazine,

Might I suggest you hire a copyeditor or two.

Love,

Hillary

Flagpole talks about traffic calming (photo and caption not fooling anyone as to where it is), including why speed humps work better than stop signs (not entirely convincing; they should've mentioned that speed humps can hurt your car, while stop signs not so much), bicycling while black (clearly a major issue), and the need for more motorcycle cops.

Worst week ever.

At least Ira Edwards appears to have a spokesman now.

Yep, benefits for the gays next on the horizon. Whatcha trying to do, Heidi? Win my vote back? Cootitude sure to follow from SMC. Perhaps E.H. Culpepper's previous campaign will be brought up in more ways than one. You know how not to get my vote? Get Doc Eldridge to talk about how awesome you are.

Is northeastern Clarke County clamoring for 864 new homes?

Man doesn't want to go to jail.

Redistricting panel meeting, but can't spoke proper English. (Actually, is Meggers on the panel? Kinda unclear.)

Are you implying learning about granite is not fun?

Athens: great place to live; smells like ass in the summer. Small price to pay.

Partially right. Not completely.

Finally. A letter supporting Bar-Peled. Too bad it kind of starts off making no sense: "It seems the Cheshire Cat has lost his smile." I've read Alice in Wonderland, and I had no clue. Wikipedia doesn't help. Also, there's a letter from a teacher at Cedar Shoals who describes himself as progressive but clearly doesn't like this kid: "Copying verses from a book called the King James Version of the Bible is necessarily wrong? Interesting." A book called? Dude, was it in your class?

Don't our soldiers have better things to do than go around messing with church signs?

R&B is back, baby, and it's covering Adams's decision to veto something from the University Council for the first time, something that he seemed to be in favor of. The editorial supports it and hopes it's the beginning of a trend of caring about students. To which we respond with laughter.

And the university's returning to a stricter hiring policy, but more for faculty than for staff. World. Upside down.

Blogger was down last night.

Hence the rushedness here.

But here is a pdf of John Seabrook's article about bird fraud (those bird people love their articles) and the lady who uncovered it (Rasmussen). What struck me was the very end:

But the reviewer for a leading birding journal, British Birds, chided Rasmussen and her lead illustrator, John Anderton, for excluding so many “undoubtedly valid recent field observations.” He added, “Doubtless this reflects the fact that the authors are primarily museum workers.”

Right. And therefore idiots.

Also, here is yet another Jeffrey Goldberg piece on how great the Democrats who aren't really Democrats are. I understand that it is written in the spirit of tolerance, supposedly, but being told to go fuck myself as a liberal voter for page after page gets old after a while. Bully for you, centrists, that you actually have a chance of winning, but winning really isn't the only important thing. Isn't anyone willing to take a stand for principle on principle? Can you do that without getting called a wackjob communist?

I've got a rock I could sell ya.

Mother of God. This must be what the ranting was about last night. There was some sort of extended apology from Mr. McCarter when the hubby called me into the living room, but we couldn't make too much sense of it (save to say it was full o' coot).

No other commissioner in the past four years has voted against a budget, according to meeting minutes going back to 2003.

Also, we are stuck with those damn bulldogs for another three years.

They are terrified of boobies in Jefferson.

Here are more details on how to shoot yourself in the foot.

Making reality conform to election year promises.

One could also point out that Chambliss and Isakson both reside in a state with plenty of Mexicans, and it's not going to be all that unpopular a move to restrict the flow. (Shipp points out that the gays are slightly less popular than illegal immigrants, these days.)

Adams in nonresponsive jackass shockah. But, dang, the self-righteousness of this letter makes one kinda completely hate moratoria too.

Letter on Hudgens and self-aggrandizement: "To hear him talk, you'd think he's looking after the citizens of Madison County, but, in reality, he did nothing." To hear him talk and, occasionally, to read the ABH editorials, yo.

One of those flea markets that's just someone's house, right? Or maybe it's slang.

Arrest: On May 29, deputy Byron Yoder was dispatched to Bell's grocery, where an employee had marijuana in his possession. Brian A. Davis, 18, of Hollow Creek Lane, Watkinsville, denied having the marijuana, but Yoder searched him and found a small bag. Davis then said he purchased it at a flea market in Pendergrass.

I think we call that language "tongues":

Arrest: On May 28, Sgt. Byron Smith was patrolling on Georgia Highway 316 when his radar showed a Toyota 4Runner going 90 mph. He stopped the vehicle and the driver, Caroline Elizabeth Greer, 21, of Royston smelled of alcohol. He asked her to do some roadside tests and while she did them politely, she did not perform well. When Smith said she was under arrest, she became argumentative. Deputy David Burchett arrived and she began crying. At the jail, she began using profane language. She called the jailers names and once talked in a foreign language. She was charged with DUI and speeding.

Couldja explain to me the origin of that nickname?

Arrest: On May 28, deputy Scott Underwood was dispatched to a home on King Road, where a woman said that Frank "Tom" Hailey III, 38, of Kings Road, had pushed and threatened her. Hailey was charged with simple battery and cruelty to children, because children were present during the assault.

Less amusingness here.

1) Better in theory than in practice: Kells's "Gorilla" (streaming), which sounded so much greater than the resulting muddle.

2) Better in practice even than in theory (and the theory is pretty great): Pants-Off Dance-Off, which is exactly what it sounds like.

Halfway through:


Finishing up:


You know how you wish there was a camera filming you during your most ridiculous moments and then you're quite thankful there isn't? Some people don't have that second part. Why do I not get this channel?! There is much video, appropriately censored with blurry bits, so I suppose it is technically safe for work.

Reviews of:

1) Beirut's Gulag Orkestar
2) Camera Obscura's new one
3) The Red River, Songs About a Flood
4) DMC's poppa rap

Beaver. Busy little.

But I'm not sure I care.

Spank Rock. Nunk. That's my current "nerd" + "crunk" word. Find me a better one.

LD was right. It has some kinda mystical power.

Hmm. This is pretty poor evidence, but it's all I can do. I think it says Ramirez could use some more hormones. Or a few extra days' notice.

Browncast number 5 is up. We also appear to be accessible via iTunes and Podcast Alley. This one's sort of day-thematic.

So what the fuck? Now there is fancy, supermodel food that comes in a tube? I'm not saying it doesn't look/sound kinda tasty, but if the very thin and rich and beautiful invade the world formerly owned by extremely sour candies and gross yogurt substances (the world, that is, of tweens) what next? Foie gras shaped like Chester the Cheetah? Caviar doodles? Yuzu gelee molded into an oozing brain?

Don't you just love the warm fuzzy folks at ARMC, arguing that they can charge the uninsured $20K for a band-aid if they damn well feel like it. And, sadly, winning their case. This is where you have to close your eyes and softly whisper to yourself "It must have legal merits. It must have legal merits" repeatedly to keep from flipping out completely.

Guessing that tomorrow we get an editorial on how kickass it is that the state of Georgia has these new academic standards and how shitty it says the school system is that loads of kids can't pass them (though I'm beginning to have slightly better feelings about criterion-referenced tests due to the book I'm proofreading) and maybe, if we're lucky, another bone to sales tax funding of education.

Today's is about patience and land use plans and Madison County, so there's more gentle patting and less ripping of new ones.

Poor prostitutes. Nobody wants them.

Isakson so cute thinking immigration issues can be fixed by fulling funding anything. We don't do that anymore, Johnny. Don't rock the boat.

A-ha. Satan told Jim Thompson to say there should be limits on free speech. Evidence here. (Sidebar: First letter on the issue thinks the kid had no dang bidness trying to exercise that right.)

Insert new names. Run old story.

Oconee County sheriff dude, it's not that you got funds. It's that actual targets didn't.

Loran Smith: road-trippin'. Hates newspapers.

McBerry for Governor! Vote for a pre-1850 world!

Email to me:

Dear Hillary,

A good start. My name is spelled correctly, which doesn't happen too often.

My name is Dennis von Malottke First, I wanted to say that you have one hell of an iconic Blog – definitely a daily read for me. Your Blog is also why I’m writing you and about 150 other Elite Bloggers in your field. Relax, don’t tune out yet – I will not ask you to peddle Ambien or Cialis for me.

Flattery gets you points. Sort of. Weirdness like missing punctuation or needless capitalization loses them.

But maybe writing about Dropping Knowledge (www.yourquestion.org) is acceptable? It’s not exactly a “daily dish” subject, but an interesting one with a charity background… and of course, you should only write about it if you like (or hate!) the idea enough.

What that idea is?
Dropping Knowledge lets people ask questions – any questions – to find out what Joe Everybody (or even “Brad Hollywood”) would like to change about the world. These questions are collected, discussed, and projects will be formed to address them. Its a way of cutting out governments, politicians and the mainstream media, so we can really get to the core of matters and better the world – with each person involved having a voice. Quite Un-Hollywood, eh?

Dropping Knowledge has already acquired many prominent supporters – luminaries like Jane Goodall, Sean Penn or Nick Cave are nominated for their round table event in September. German Insurance firm Allianz even supports them with a web platform and TV ads, and they add a news service to the site where global issues are discussed.

Huh. Vaguely interesting.

So, why are we e-mailing you? Well, you are a funny, influential blogger read by thousands.

So you don't know my blog. Clearly.

And we desperately need coverage, even (and especially) for the entertainment and glamour-junkie crowd. Of course, you’re free to write something positive, something negative, treat it serious, ridicule it, question it or whatever. We respect your Blog, and freedom of expression is sacred to us. After all, it is what half of the project is about.

Woot for freedom of expression.

We want you to participate and we would like you to pass it on. We don't have the money to pay for space on your site. Frankly, we don't have money.

But we’d be delighted if you did one or more of the following:

Visit our site, check it out. If you like (or hate) the concept, write a blog entry about it and/or host our webband – you can find it at www.yourquestion.org/webband.

We'd like you to post your article in the first week of June, the second week if you can’t get around to it in week 1. Reason: We want to create a "Blogstorm" within a short amount of time.

And lastly: If you participate, please e-mail us back that you do – we like to be informed and would actually be excited to get a personal Email from you.

Our goal is to collect 100,000 questions. Please help us reach that goal.

Maybe with a question of your own?

Of course, the website doesn't actually work. Rock on.

Nearly a month and only two new entries.

28) The artist Tony Oursler attended CalArts in the 1970's and is represented with his own program of student works, including ''The Life of Phillis,'' a spasmodically funny video shot in the school lunch room. Centering on the travails (prostitution, necrophilia, murder) of the title character, it opens with a man's hand plucking a minuscule baby doll from the panties of a Barbie-like figure in a miniskirt and go-go boots. [from "The School With Antz In Its SquarePants" by Manohla Dargis, 05/21/06; technically a review of a show about CalArts and its video program, but check the crossover author]

29) Jonathan Miles: Modern cookbook writers rarely take the time to address the origins of women's panties, the best time of year for eating robins and meadowlarks, the effects of menstruation on mayonnaise-making and the unheralded kitchen pioneering of Genghis Khan, the Virgin Mary and Stonewall Jackson. George Herter's bombastic comic-culinary masterpiece, ''Bull Cook and Authentic Historical Recipes and Practices,'' self-published in 1960, did all that and more, as the opening lines attest: ''I will start with meats, fish, eggs, soups and sauces, sandwiches, vegetables, the art of French frying, desserts, how to dress game, how to properly sharpen a knife, how to make wines and beer, how to make French soap and also what to do in case of hydrogen or cobalt bomb attack. Keeping as much in alphabetical order as possible.'' Imagine the ''Joy of Cooking'' in the early stages of dementia. [from "Save These Books!" in the Book Review food issue, 05/28/06, an article that asked a bunch of people what their favorite out-of-print cookbook was; note: I think it's quite likely that my mom has or had this book]

Note: Panty-watch is a regular feature here dedicated to tracking appearances of the word "panties" or "panty" in the New York Times, partially because it's amusing to see the Gray Lady venturing into such areas and partially to see if it correlates with anything specific. The end of the year should result in a few more graphs.

[previously] [bugmenot NYT]

Jukebox 20 up. I feel nicely in sync for once. The Nelly Furtado really is the best song of the week. The Vines one really does suck. I thought I was being cranky, but it turns out I was being right.

Except I said this about the Marcelo D2 song: Hmm. Newest lesson learned is that baritone sax can be uncool if used properly. “O Gueto” is bad rap (is it even?) with elements of Big Bad Voodoo Daddy. Ick. [3]

Not that that's not right. It's just crankier than average.

Tunes to you if hillaryhazelbrown@gmail is emailed.

Birth: More than just creepiness, but that's there too. I knew Jonathan Glazer's name was familiar, but forgot to look him up. Now it all makes sense: the dreamy, beautifully colored imagery; the highly stylized acting (Kidman looks like her legs don't eve belong to her, she walks on them so strangely); the suddenness of action when it happens. I think these are things you can say of Sexy Beast as well, but they're more so in Birth. And it looks like a Woody Allen movie, one of his Bergman dramas. Everyone is ridiculously beautifully dressed. The colors (not really many of them) are harmonious. It has a peaceful feel until people get attacked or make sudden and unusual decisions. Do I have an answer at the end of it? No, but it slowed my breathing and grabbed my interest, which is more than a lot of similarly paced movies would do. (Query: Is Kidman's Rosemary's Baby hair intentional?)

Please explain why counties have to raise property taxes to pay for their school systems. Perhaps this has something to with their not being funded adequately to begin with.

Technology as force for good.

Is it worth $3 a day to ride in a van full of "wacky" people?

Note that people do not ever ever want to pay for stuff.

Ew. Old man tells you the drank is like dead flies.

Why yes. No doubt this House of Representatives committee will end up concluding to increase library funding. Paying attention to an issue isn't always good. It depends on who's in charge. Also to its credit, the legislature took time in this year's session to adopt a creative approach to library-related funding.

House Bill 1053 establishes a "prestige license tag" with proceeds going to the Georgia Center for the Book. According to its Web site, the center is the state affiliate of the Center for the Book at the Library of Congress. The state center's mission, the site notes, "is the support of libraries, literacy and literature, particularly Georgia's rich literary heritage."

For each prestige tag sold, $10 will be steered to the center "to support the purchase of books for public libraries in Georgia." Athens-Clarke County's legislative delegation unanimously supported House Bill 1053.

As H.B. 1053 shows, state legislators can find ways to get funding to worthwhile initiatives such as public libraries. If that spirit of creativity can be sustained by the House study committee, and by the legislature as a whole, the complex issue of library funding is certain to get the thoughtful attention it deserves.

Flowers and kittens and rainbows, people.

Francis Assaf also has some kind of full-time letter-writing job.

No letters yet on Thompson's bizarre excuse-making column arguing for limits on free speech.

Politics cheap and effective drug for youth of today.

When people talk about the feminists and their humorlessness, they are reacting to stuff like this. I'm not saying George Ouzounian is the most enlightened dude in the world, more than happy to run go get his girlfriend tampons a la Dr. Pepper ad. He looks pretty mookish, crossed with a healthy helping of nerd. I am saying that asking why women are more allowed to be mocked than folks of color is fucking stupid. Here is why: women are better off. There are scales for these sorts of things, and by those scales, white chicks are doing better than, say, African American males. Less likely to be in jail. More likely to get a loan from a bank. Less likely to die of certain kinds of cancer (more likely on some other kinds). I also think that, while Ouzounian never explicitly says it's white women he's more targeting (and we could argue about that too), it's pretty clear that's the case. Probably got rather more worked up about this when I first read it than now.

Sometimes we wonder if you have ever used a keyboard before. Or the English language.

Date: June 5, 2006 9:34:58 AM EDT
To: UGA-FORSALE@LISTSERV.UGA.EDU
Subject: double im flaeable bed 5000 btu ac

double size im flateable bed brand new use one time 100.00
also a new 5000 btu window ac unit used one night on a
camping trip 85.00

Yay! We're all a little less likely to die! Who says the paper never reports good news?

Reverse discrimination suit filed against ACC school district and some board members. This is going to be painful.

Cedar Shoals salutatorian not allowed to mock his own school at graduation.

The speech also questions lessons from Bar-Peled's health class, saying that not only did he "discover that condoms and birth control pills were engineered by liberals and the devil, but that Jesus is not just a name, but my personal savior." A follow-up parenthetical note questions if he also should talk about the time he had to "copy passages from the King James Bible for a grade."

Donna Bar-Peled wasn't aware her son had to copy Bible passages until she read the speech, but an older son who graduated from Cedar Shoals two years ago then told her he also had to copy Bible verses, she said. Such requirements are inappropriate for a public school, particularly with the mix of cultures and religions in the student body, she said.

Understating it a bit? Jim Thompson doesn't actually say "fire in a crowded theater," but he comes damn close, making the old "be responsible with your free speech" argument. Now I may be wrong here, but I don't seem to remember that part being in the damn Constitution. Corrections would, of course, be welcome.

Taylor leads Cox. Dunno leads both of 'em. Mr. Jones covers their differences on health care: Taylor wants all children in Georgia to have insurance, regardless of income. Because that's not insane. Cox wants merely to expand PeachCare and her campaign people promise big ideas to come.

Damn if that Adams fella can't be somewhat reasonable at times.

"Any academic fraud is serious, but we would make a mistake if we jump to the conclusion that there are a huge number of cases that we are concerned about," said Michael Adams, Georgia's president and the outgoing president of the SEC. "There have been three or four cases in this conference that several people thought determined a second look at test score reliability or transcript reliability."

Jumping to conclusions only okay when it's about demonizing your students who might have a little nip every weekend.

Henry Shirah has yet another insane letter to the editor. He's really piled up an impressive number.

Most exacting description ever of anarchy symbol.

Advice to melee starters: the dark is a good location.

Rock Eagle is back to normal after Katrina folks mostly gone. UGA would "volunteer: facilities again "if directed," which is nice, I suppose, but not quite the same as doing it immediately out of the goodness of your heart.

Walton County has a hugely diverse economy: from stocking shelves to making cups. Woo.

Madison County Commission wanders around in circles, snapping at itself.

Depending on your district, punching a cop may not hurt your reelection chances.

Rocks how Perdue will tout UGA in a letter for a biodefense facility. How about funding it first, fucker? Also, sorta seems like that biobusiness corridor is a way for a lot of companies to get started, take what they need, then move elsewhere. Awesome.

ABH notices disbursement of DHS funds is severely retarded.

Spec Ops vet and UGA student writes agin moratoria, an unpopular position if I've ever seen one. Look. Situations do change rapidly. And while I haven't always been the biggest fan of the ones in which the commission has exercised its right to moratoria, I do understand why they've done so, and sometimes it's appropriate, especially considering how long it can take to pass a new ordinance.

Shipp talks about Perdue's redistricting panel (well constituted) and Unity 08, the new Bull Moose.

Dick Yarbrough loves to hang with authority figures.

John English writes about the fraternity that wants to move into Cobbham, but he doesn't seem to realize that UGA did offer land on East Campus to the soon-to-be-displaced fraternities. They just didn't make it attractive or guarantee they'd be able to stay there a long time (they wouldn't own it). The real issue is why they're being pushed off campus to begin with, not just the consequences of that happening.

I heard this while ESPN was showing paintball the other day, as I was walking away from the living room, and I had to grab a piece of paper and a pen to write it down. Upon which I promptly forgot about it until a few days later, when I found the piece of paper again. Here's what it says, a direct quote from one of the announcers, and it should convey why you should never ever watch paintball on TV:

Williamson is very angry right now at his players for dying for no apparent reason.

Jefferson police chief fired due to internal investigations, not due to state investigations of the exact same stuff. That is one slim distinction.

But I'd venture to say Madison's pulling ahead in this race, with its commissioners fighting among themselves over a problem that they helped cause and Hudgens stirred the pot of. Can we please have a commission meeting where someone's answering machine message from a state senator gets played?

Jane files suit on principle with Supreme Court.

AP article on Georgia CMOs does make them sound like an improvement. Here's an article that points out some of the potential problems. Oy, and then there are these details in the editorial the same day, about health incentives, which seem to be financial rewards for following your doctor's advice, only they're financial rewards that can only be used toward medical expenses not covered by Medicaid or the state insurance plan. My guess is, once proved "successful," they'll provide a reason to cut those forms of insurance. The idea's not necessarily bad on its own. It's more just suspicious.

From hazing to not making inappropriate gestures on facebook, because they're very much the same thing.

So if you have a shit-ton of money and a maid to go to the grocery store for you, you can have New Urbanism in the Athens area.

ABH picks up on new reason to oppose getting rid of "Cocktail Party" phrase.

Imagine William Hung advertising for Hamburger Helper. But with no context.

Three Days in September: Topic richer than storytelling skills, and the presence of Julia Roberts as narrator is distracting. Not only is she too recognizable and not connected with the story for any reason, but she occasionally emphasizes the wrong word in a sentence. It's sensitively handled and shows how the people of Beslan are mad at both the terrorists involved and their government (the short footage of Putin in a hospital ward, patting patients in a manner meant to be sympathetic, but which comes off as squeamish and uncomprehending, is damning), but the revelations that a lot of people you've been hearing about are, in fact, alive are both manipulative and maybe tend to minimize the tragedy a little. Not that that should be the case, but when we've seen their faces throughout and focused on them, the relief that they've survived tends to overpower the upsettingness of the 350-ish who did die. I do wish it had done a bit more digging into what exactly triggered the explosion and subsequent gun battle, as there've been several explanations. You know, September's kind of a shitty month.

Mr. Brown is learning quite well how to be an editor. Here's something he instant messaged me the other day:

i'm inclined to strike the whole sentence, but i feel like to a certain extent you have to honor the intentions (however stupid) of the author (?)

This must be how parents feel when their child takes its first steps. And it should also be on a T-shirt for editors.

Longest 49 seconds ever.

No one's arguing these ladies don't love dogs.

An online petition to keep the shelter open has amassed more than 1,400 signatures, and other longtime animal rescue activists have stepped up their support for the shelter by calling and writing letters to the agriculture department.

But department officials said the closure date is firm.

"This is something they've agreed to," said Arty Schronce, a spokesman for the agriculture department. "They agreed to cooperate with us on this, and starting a petition to prevent it from happening is not what I call cooperation.

"This is the first time we've ever had to take an action like this against a rescue group. We worked with them for more than two years trying to get the shelter into compliance. We don't want to shut anyone down, especially a rescue group."

What they're arguing is that some people love dogs to an extreme.

This is called trying to build a case. Eyewitness accounts can indeed be inaccurate. But bald versus not bald is kind of a big difference. Maybe he owns a wig.

Kathy Hoard-Alice Kinman catfight in the works. Recreational sidewalks v. functional sidewalks. You know what's good? Shit that functions.

Look, bitches. Your tax rate can't go higher without a referendum, and things have to fall into place to make that happen.

Ten people attended Wednesday night's public hearing on the school budget, which was held at Gaines Elementary School. Some questioned why the budget increased so much over last year's $99 million budget and whether the school district is spending wisely when it has some of the highest per-pupil expenditures in the state.

Simms pointed to state-mandated spending, including $3.5 million in teacher pay increases and the cost of new teachers and portable classrooms because of reduced class sizes set by the state legislature.

Love the uninformed questions. Why bother to show if you don't know what's going on?

ABH appealing its case to get records on murders.

It's incredible how Spurrier always knows just how to piss off a Georgia fan.

Classic Wayne Ford.

Winders reveals secret identity as giant nerd (he's with me on the Ghost Rider trailer, too, for double confirmation).

ABH prefers the longer calendar for Chase and Gaines School Elems. But, again, they love the anecdotal evidence.

Yes. Glut is just the word.

The real question is how come no one took a free shot at Fairplay. Unless they're saying Victoria did. Really, what we call this in the biz is "win win."

And your animal obsession.

First:

Date: June 1, 2006 9:25:51 AM EDT
To: UGA-FORSALE@LISTSERV.UGA.EDU
Subject: WANTED!!!!!! Got deer problems????

Got deer problems?

If so, give me a shout.

Military Vet seeks to see the land I've protected in the past.

Looking to lease hunting land or join hunting club, 100 - 1000 plus acres.

My whole family hunts, wife, daughter, son and myself and we're not blessed enough to be wealthy land rich.

I would also like to find an area within city limits to archery hunt or muzzle load hunt, to help control the deer population. With all the building the deer are being forced into residential areas and an extremely high rate of auto/deer collisions are occurring, not to mention all beautiful landscaping being eaten and the risk of disease (Lymes) gotta luv those TICKS!!!

Willing to pay or work for privileges of utilizing your land.

Second:

Date: June 1, 2006 9:31:47 AM EDT
To: UGASTAFF@LISTSERV.UGA.EDU
Subject: getting rid of bats?!

Ok guys (and girls!),
I have read on here many times about all the old folks tales of how to get rid of bats in the attic. It never concerned me at the time but now it does. Was there a REAL legitimate way to get rid of them? I've got a bat, (or who knows how many but we've only see one), living in our garage attic. We've checked the vents up there and they are already screened. Don't have a clue on how it's getting in. We are using this for storage and do not want bat poop on everything!!!

Someone's whole story in one google search that happened to light here.